Title’s POV

I walk on the corridor checking if either Ai’Gun or Ai’Cap are already back in the house but I was shocked seeing P’Mark hugging Ai’Gun while walking on the corridor with Ai’Cap following behind—looking so solemn and of course Ai’White is beside Ai’Cap. “What happened?” I don’t normally talk a lot but I can feel the tension. Somehow, it makes Ai’Gun to raise his head and I was so shocked seeing his bloodshot eyes, “Just—an argument P’—but P’Gun is good,” Ai’Cap answered my question but that doesn’t even make me at ease.

They walk pass me already but I follow after them. They went in Ai’Cap and Ai’Gun’s room, “You—out right now!” Ai’Cap’s voice sounds scary somehow. I saw Ai’White and P’Mark walk out of the room with both of them sharing the worried expression. I know that P’Mark and I haven’t talked in a while—right after the issue the other day with mistaken message to Ai’Gun but I cannot sleep thinking that my friend—one of my closest friend is inside that room—probably crying his heart out again.

I grab both Ai’White and P’Mark’s hands and pull them, “Hey—hey!” P’Mark was protesting while Ai’White follows silently, “Where are we—woie! Ai’Title!” but I just let P’Mark complains because I am done just looking at them. Ai’White did mess up with Ai’White badly before they started dating and P’Mark’s name means bad news to all of us—especially to Ai’Gun.

I pulled both of them to the mini bar beside P’Heechul’s kitchen. P’ did tell us that we can drink here but make sure to clean our mess after.

Even though both of them looks confused, they still sit down and I put down 3 shot glasses and pulled out one of P’Heechul’s vodka, “What happened?” I asked again and pour each glasses a full shot of vodka—just vodka. I know it’s strong and I know we need some chaser but I decided to cut the crap, “Nothing—” “Don’t give me the nothing bull!” I cut Ai’White. He is as loyal as his boyfriend.

I look at P’Mark and pushed the glass towards him, “You might need to drink this khrab P’,” I told him though my voice doesn’t sound nice anymore. I am talking too much too—and Coo told me I only talked too much when I am talking to him, when I am sort of mad and upset, or when I want something. It looks like P’Mark really need that drink because he didn’t even flinch when he one shot the drink, “!” he cursed and I am curious now if he cursed because of the drink or because of what happened—that I still don’t know.

I pour another drink for him, “Seriously P’Mark—Ai’White, I don’t normally pry na khrab a lot especially to other people aside from Cooheart, but I saw Ai’Gun na khrab just now. Did he cry?” he never cries—even when we lose band battles or when he got C minus from one of our major subject—he always stays positive. I drink my own vodka letting the warm sharp feeling of the alcohol crawl down from my neck down to my stomach, “Ai’Title—Ai’Gun and I—” P’ looks at me straight in the eyes. I know what he is doing—he is trying to intimidate me to back off and stop asking, “Are dating,” he said and I only nod.

I don’t even think that my facial expression changes—not even a bit, “Woie—aren’t you shocked Ai’Title?” I look at Ai’White with his empty shot glass; he really cannot help but asked me. I shook my head, “It’s very obvious na khrab—Ai’Gun is in love but he didn’t understand it na khrab—” but I glared at P’Mark while he’s avoiding my eyes and just busy drinking his alcohol, “though I don’t like P’Mark na khrab for Ai’Gun.”

Ai’White laughs anyway, “You are so blunt—don’t you Ai’Title?” I pour them both another shot of vodka, “Do you even have any idea na khrab—how scared I was when I faced the head hazer of fourth year na khrab when I was just a freshman student?” I was trembling—scared—and cannot stand straight.

Flashback

I’ve met a very talented freshman just like me during the freshman orientation. We are classmate too and he has this over flowing potential—I want him in my band. Technically, there are two of them, one’s a drummer boy who looks more like a middle schooler rather than a university student called Ai’Plan and of course—our future vocalist and bassist, Ai’Gun.

There’s only one terrifying details that we all need to do, “Woie! Don’t worry na Ai’Title, my P’Hyuk na khrab isn’t that scary. People here in university na P’ are just exaggerating na khrab when they say that P’ is scary. He is a very good older brother to me and to Ai’Cap na P’. You don’t even need to worry because I am here and also Ai’Plan is here.” Yes, the three of us are on the way to College of Engineering because I need to face Ai’Gun’s older brother for permission.

Ai’Gun told me that he wants to join but we need to ask his brother first if it’s okay because they always go back home together because only his brother is allowed to drive their car.

Lunch break in our college, we all go straight to College of Engineering—actually—we are heading straight to the open field where we can already see hundreds or maybe thousands of new Engineering student in the middle of the field—sacrificing themselves to Thai Summer heat—I gulp. “WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT RESPECTING YOUR SENIORS?!?” I almost flinch hearing that loud yell.

When I look at my side, Ai’Plan looks scared as I am while Ai’Gun is smiling brightly, “Woie! P’Hyuk is so lively today na khrab~” did he really say that? We all walk in silent until we are a few meters away from the freshmen. “I CANNOT HEAR YOU! SPEAK LOUDER!” his P’ shouted again. So this is the terrifying SOTUS system of College of Engineering. They are bunch of barbaric people.

As soon as the hazers see us—or maybe only Ai’Gun walking behind me, then all wave their hands, “WOIE! NONG’GUN~” and this Ai’Oblivious behind me waves his hands back to those terrifying looking seniors. I suddenly hate the attention when the entire freshmen look at our direction.

“Who?”

“Don’t look na khrab!”

“P’Hyuk’s Nong~”

“Which one na khrab?”

“Woie! Na kar~”

“Red hair na khrab~”

“WHO SAID YOU CAN ALL LOOK?? LOWER YOUR EYES! ALL OF YOU!!” Ai’Gun’s P’ commanded the entire freshmen and unbelievable as it may seem, they all lower down their heads.

This might be weird that the previous head hazer is commanding the first year right now but I’ve heard before coming here that Engineering freshmen boycotted their third year seniors for SOTUS gathering yesterday which sent this fierce fourth year head hazer to step in and told the third year to take a rest today and they (the previous hazer) will take over just for this week to teach the freshmen the harsh way of SOTUS. They are scary!

The three of us stop in front of the blue jacket seniors (blue jacket for fourth years and red for third year). I didn’t notice when but I was the one leading us to the field a moment ago but now, Ai’Gun is in front. The three of us wai in union, “Sawadee khrab P’,” we said. I don’t know why Ai’Plan is nervous, this isn’t the first time he is meeting Ai’Gun’s brother. They told me that they were high school classmates.

All the hazers including the head hazer wai back at us, unbelievable—right? “Wadee,” then suddenly the head hazer looks at me. I don’t easily get scared or intimidated but this P’ is terrifying, “Ai’Gun, who is this new friend with you na khrab?” I noticed the changes in his voice too. He sounds so cold towards his juniors but so soft towards his brother. “Woie! P’, this is Ai’Title na khrab. He is our classmate na P’—can you believe that P’? Ai’Plan and I are classmates again~” if Ai’Gun has confetti, he is probably throwing them already all over the place.

“Wow—” P’Hyuk looks at Ai’Plan, “You two should always be together na Ai’Plan—just like in High school, right?” that doesn’t sound like a friendly conversation between your brother’s best friend, “Ch—chai P’—Ai’Gun and—I—we will always eat—lunch together na P’,” Ai’Plan didn’t even make it less obvious that he is nervous around P’Hyuk.

Anyway, I only sigh in relief when P’Hyuk directed his attention back to his brother, “Woie Ai’Gun, what are you even doing here in Engineering na khrab?” one hazer asked Ai’Gun, but even before he can speak, another hazer ask, “Did someone bully you in your college na khrab?” then another, “Do you need back up na Nong?” then another, “Or do you want to eat lunch in Engineering na Ai’Gun?” I don’t know how Ai’Gun handles all of this but—it’s too much for me.

Ai’Gun’s laugher sounds so loud especially when the entire field is just listening to him—everything that he is saying, “Woie! Who would even try to bully me na khrab? P’Hyuk went with me on the first day of school na khrab and then people in my college are talking so nicely to me na woie~ But, eating here? Hum—Ai’Plan—Ai’Title,” “Chai?” both Ai’Plan and I answered in union. We are so alert, “Tomyang is good in Engineering na Ai’. Do you like eating here with my P’Hyuk na khrab?” I nod without thinking twice, and so did Ai’Plan, “Woie! P’—are you going to finish soon na khrab? We are hungry na P’ and we only have 1 hour of break na khrab~” I don’t think they are close to finishing their hazing but I noticed how much P’Hyuk smiles at Ai’Gun, “Kharb, hang on na Ai’Gun. The three of you can go with your P’Singto na khrab while I am saying goodbye to first year na khrab~”

Ai’Gun nods his head before we follow another senior wearing blue jacket. He looks so calm and nice—unlike P’Hyuk. We are half way the field when we all heard the loud voice of P’Hyuk again, “BE THANKFUL THAT MY BROTHER IS HERE! THE NEXT TIME YOU DISRESPECT YOUR SENIOR AGAIN—I WILL LET YOU STAY OUT HERE UNTIL THE END OF YOUR CLASS DOING PUSH UP DRILLS!” it follows with a loud, “KHRAB, P’HYUK~” “DISMISS! BE BACK AFTER AN HOUR!”

Then the sounds faded already as we enter the Engineering cafeteria.

This is like entering a battle field. Ai’Gun is walking beside this P’Singto chatting happily while Ai’Plan and I are walking side by side—not breathing at all. “You guys can sit on that table na khrab while I’ll get your tomyang,” P’Singto pointed at the table at the middle part of the cafeteria. This is so weird, three Music Students walking and most probably will seat in the middle of Engineering cafeteria.

“Woie P’ I want to buy more na khrab aside from tomyan—maybe I can go too and buy—” “No!” I was shocked by the sudden cut off and P’Singto looks so serious, “I still love my life na Ai’Gun and even if your P’ is very close to me, I can’t risk of dying here because I simply let you buy your food alone. Now, go sit there and wait for me, okay?” I bit my inner cheeks preventing myself from saying something because damn this is intense, “What do you mean P’? Will someone kill you na khrab? Do you want me to talk to P’Hyuk to help you na P’Singto? Woie~ P’Krist will not be happy about this~” he is slow—very slow—I get it. I smile and decided to drag Ai’Gun without saying a word.

The entire time of sitting here in the middle, engineering students keep on looking at us briefly before looking down again and some are talking softly unlike when we first came in, they are all laughing and throwing food at each other—now it feels like we are inside the church. “Ai’Gun, how long have you been going here in Engineering na khrab?” I asked him. It wasn’t so loud but because people are all silent, they probably heard my question.

“The first time? Last two years ago na Ai’ because P’Hyuk na khrab said they have sports festival so I was so excited I asked him if I can go and Ai’Cap too went with us and then every time Ai’Cap and I are free or Ai’Plan and I have a lot of free time, we go here to eat lunch with P’Hyuk and his friends. Woie! those hazer P’s have been to our house many times when P’Hyuk was in first year in university na khrab,” so meaning to say, P’Hyuk has been implying to everyone not to ing mess up with his brothers since two years ago.

‘Title what will you do now? You have to ask permission na khrab to P’Hyuk or else you will lose your main vocalist na khrab—and maybe my drummer will also quit!’

Suddenly, there are several dishes on our table and some students mostly wearing red jackets are helping P’Singto to carry the bowl and plates and foods on our table. Just how hardcore is this college? Why are they treating us so nicely? Or why are they treating Ai’Gun so nicely? “You only said tomyang na Ai’Gun but now there are so many na khrab—how will we finish this?” Ai’Plan asked us but make sure his voice is so soft just for the three of us. I sigh while shaking my head while Ai’Gun is smiling, “Woie don’t worry na khrab, P’Hyuk will help us~”

Like his cue, if it’s even possible, the entire cafeteria became so quiet that I can even hear the grill of those pars cooking on the food stations. I look around and find P’Hyuk with the rest of the hazers walking confidently inside the cafeteria without looking at anyone—without smiling or even talking to anyone.

Good thing, the three of us are sitting side by side other with Ai’Gun in the middle.

The hazers sit opposite mainly to us and the other hazers that wasn’t able to fit in the table moved another table to where we are sitting to make a bigger table. “Did you try your tomyang already Ai’Gun?” the moment P’Hyuk asked, the entire cafeteria started acting normally again. They are laughing and talking loudly and even throwing foods again. “Not yet na P’Hyuk—but woie there are so many P’. We will not be able to eat all of this P’ so you need to help us na khrab—” then Ai’Gun look around, “P’Singto cannot eat spicy food na kharb, but I know that P’Off likes to eat spicy food~” Ai’Gun and this P’Off high five—this P’ is wearing red jacket not blue.

“Woie! You are really smart na Ai’Gun! Okay, I will eat a lot for you,” they look so close together, “Ai’Plan likes eating a lot too, right? I remember he likes the ice coffee here na khrab, should we get some?” another P’ wearing blue jacket asked and Ai’Plan suddenly smiles brightly, “Woie! P’Tor, you are such a great P’ na khrab! But—I can buy it na P’ and—” the breathing hitch from everyone, “No need na Ai’Plan. You are such a great friend to Ai’Gun so let your P’Tor buy you three your ice coffee na khrab,” and P’Tor run off without letting Ai’Plan talk again.

They are weird, all of them are weird and it looks like I am the only one feeling weird about the situation.

The entire lunch was a torture not only for me but for the entire engineering students. Did I mention that we finished the meal in span of 30minutes? I wanted to finish this already—really, “I will join Ai’Title’s band na P’Hyuk,” I almost choke on my ice coffee when Ai’Gun said it out of nowhere.  I put down my drink when I noticed how everyone looks at me, “Ai’Plan will also join na khrab but I told Ai’Title na P’Hyuk to ask permission to you na khrab because we always go home together na P’,” Ai’Gun is dropping all the information while trying to finish his ice cream that P’Off bought for everyone.

“No!” only that word and I shiver already, “This will only affect your study na Ai’Gun,” his political voice is scaring the s out of me—but they forgot something. I am the son of a musician—and nevertheless, he is a businessman. My Pa is crazy getting the talents he wants—and so do I, “Aww—P’ I approached both Ai’Gun and Ai’Plan because I saw potentials on them,” I smile nicely at him because that’s how it supposed to be.

P’Hyuk on the other hand looks cold—and actually the hazers behind him are all gesturing me to stop talking or I’ll be dead, “Ai’Gun is very talented na P’Hyuk—he has really nice voice na P’ and he is a talented bassist too—Ai’Plan too—but I know that if Ai’Gun will not join, Ai’Plan will also not join—” I am speaking way too much, “I promise this will not affect their grades na P’Hyuk~” I know what I said isn’t enough yet to please the previews head hazer.

He shook his head, “Awww P’Hyuk~” Ai’Gun whined and drop his spoon on the table. He looks upset, “Ai’Gun—P’ is doing this because you will be distracted na khrab if you will join this band,” it feels like P’Hyuk is talking to a 5-year-old kid rather than a freshman university student. I sigh deeply, “I guess—we cannot do anything about it Ai’Gun,” they all look at me again but I love the sad eyes of Ai’Gun and Ai’Plan right now. They are so pure—I swear I will protect them when I get P’Hyuk’s permission.

“Maybe—P’Hyuk is right na khrab. This extra activity will affect your grades na khrab and I don’t want that to happen,” I only speak long when I am with Cooheart, when I am angry or somehow upset—and when I want something. I smile apologetically to them, “I mean, Ai’Gun—you are really talented na khrab—so good that I chose you to be the main vocalist na khrab—right?” and Ai’Gun nods eagerly, “Because I believe in you na Ai’Gun—I believe in you so much and—” “Don’t you believe in me na khrab too, P’Hyuk?” I almost laugh when Ai’Gun got that conclusion.

I only want him to fight for what he wants because I really believe in him but he took it in different turn, “Aliawa? No—no—Ai’Gun listen to me—you are a great musician na khrab and you know that Ai’Cap and I are your number 1 fan na khrab—right?” it’s fun outsmarting the fourth year head hazer of Engineering, “But P’—Ai’Title really talked to me as soon as he heard me sing and told me na khrab that I am so good. Then I introduced Ai’Plan to him and he got impressed by Ai’Plan’s skills too—but P’Hyuk said that he is my number one fan but P’ didn’t let me join the band na khrab~”

In the corner, I can see the other hazer laughing silently. I grin  at them and one by one, they show me their thumbs up—of course they didn’t let P’Hyuk sees it, “I—but—Ai’Gun—” “Na na na P’Hyuk—you will let us join right? Na—P’Hyuk~” this is game over for P’Hyuk.

A loud sharp sigh followed by sudden P’Hyuk’s loud voice, “Fine!” I smile, “Yeah~” Ai’Plan and Ai’Gun’s high five, “But—” then P’ looks at me, “If this band thing na khrab will put Ai’Gun in trouble—then prepare to die because the entire Engineering na khrab—will hunt you Nong~”

Back to Reality

“P’Hyuk is—terrifying,” Ai’White said probably remembering his time with P’Hyuk.

“I know,” I sigh and agree with him before we clunk out shot glasses.

“He hurt Ai’Gun,” I look at P’Mark when he said that P’Hyuk hurt Ai’Gun. There’s no way that P’ will hurt Ai’Gun—well maybe unintentionally—but no. “Ai’Gun was treated differently in Engineering na P’Mark—there’s no way—” “I was there okay! Even Ai’White was there!” I look at Ai’White but he only looks down. “P’Hyuk said that Ai’Gun is stupid and dumb and slow!” I can feel the anger coming from P’Mark.

I put down my shot glass, “For what? He is dumb and stupid and slow for what reason?” I asked him this time. That explains why Ai’Gun was crying—P’Hyuk handles both him and Ai’Cap with too much care, “For believing in me—that I will not trick him—just like what I did to Ai’Cap and Ai’Best—but that wasn’t the point Ai’—he hurts Ai’Gun’s feelings!” I clench my jaw and grind my teeth. “Yeah, P’Mark! How sure are we na khrab that you will not trick Ai’Gun?” doesn’t mean I am not speaking up all these time, I didn’t have any grudges on him, “I’ve been protecting Ai’Gun, Ai’Plan, Ai’Cap, Ai’Toptap—even Ai’Fluke for so long!”

“Ai’Fluke? Why do you even protect Ai’Fluke na khrab? There’s no way Ai’Ohm will harm him,” Ai’White commented and I look directly at him, “Exactly, that’s why I am protecting Ai’Fluke from himself na khrab—and also protecting Ai’Fluke so that he won’t hurt Ai’Ohm—but that wasn’t the point. P’Hyuk entrusted Ai’Gun to me after he graduated from the University—he trusted me enough to let Ai’Cap joined the band—then suddenly both of you will arrive and flipped their world around. Now tell me P’Mark—how sure are we that you will not trick and hurt Ai’Gun?” his eyes are telling me to believe in him but I am done with him being so manipulative.

P’ put down his shot glass loudly, “I love him!” I snicker, “I’ve heard that from you a lot P’ but you still used P’Best—right? I am not stupid not to see thru your plan P’,” he nods his head, “Chai, I used him—I will not try to deny anything—but this isn’t about me Ai’Title—this is about Ai’Gun’s feelings!” this P’ is spatting bull, “This is all about you P’! You ing announced that you love Ai’Gun—then openly flirted with him na P’—then suddenly acted so friendly with him while you keep on spatting about your bulls with P’Best—and then now you are angry because P’Hyuk called Ai’Gun stupid? dumb? and what? slow?” I am too angry right now.

I understand how P’Hyuk feels right now. It must have been awful calling Ai’Gun those names but he definitely didn’t mean it, “Fine! Let’s say that P’Hyuk didn’t mean it, but how about Ai’Gun? How about his feelings?” he still doesn’t get it. “P’Mark, Ai’Gun loves P’Hyuk—Ai’Gun will then realized that P’ didn’t mean it—and I think Ai’Cap will not let them fight—he will explain it very well to P’Hyuk and Ai’Gun,” finally, Ai’White is saying something useful to P’Mark.

“Look P’Mark—what I want to say is—P’Hyuk will never want to harm his brothers na khrab. Believe in me because I’ve seen them—and how P’ treated them especially when P’ was still in the university. You are lucky enough—no—both of you are lucky enough that P’Hyuk didn’t witnessed your first hand flirting with his brothers. Now—I want you P’Mark to be open minded. Ai’Gun isn’t yours—he is also a brother to Ai’Cap and P’Hyuk and as his boyfriend, you shouldn’t be the reason na khrab of their misunderstandings and argument. Come out clean to P’Hyuk—prove him that you will not do the same with Ai’Gun—shower him with all or whatever you can give—and try your best to reach out to his brothers. Earn P’Hyuk’s trust—and maybe you need to earn Ai’Cap’s trust—then eventually P’ will acknowledge you—just like how he acknowledged me before,” I pat P’Mark’s shoulder.

I said I don’t like him—but I am not close minded. Ai’Gun loves him and when Ai’Gun loves something, he will go all out of it just like his passion for music. P’Mark needs to prove to everyone that he deserves Ai’Gun and the love Ai’Gun will give to him.

“Thank you na khrab~”

This is wayyyyy tooooo longggggg

I love head hazer Hyuk and I love reading Title’s POV—he makes so much sense hahahahha

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