"It was her death anniversary. That's why I went back," Seungri explained more clearly this time. "I went to go visit her and her parents."

Sitting beside him on his couch, Suzy quietly listened to his story.

"She died about a month after she turned 23. She was already pretty weak by then; couldn't walk or do anything herself. Hara told me about her disease a few months after she saw the doctor, so we only really had 4 months, I think, to spend together. Those four months went by," he snapped his fingers, "like that." He grew silent for a moment, recalling the memories. "I never thought a person could become so weak in so short a time. Her blood was being out of her, literally."

"Seungri-" Suzy interjected after seeing the anguish in his expression.

"Don't feel bad for me. I need to tell you. You have the right to know."

She nodded then.

"Since she died, I've had a hard time sleeping. Until a few months ago, every time I closed my eyes, I could see it in my head; how she looked the moment she died. I was in the room when she reached her arm like this," he demonstrated half-heartedly, "towards me, like she wanted me to save her. I held her hand and she, uh…" Seungri closed his eyes.

You won't forget me, right Seungri?

When he opened his eyes, even the image of it remained etched in his mind. "She asked me not to forget her. Then she just stopped breathing. Her hand got limp and weightless for a second. Eventually it got cold. The doctor had to force me out of the room because I couldn't stop staring at her. I was willing her eyes to blink. It didn't make sense to me how somebody could be so alive one second and be so lifeless the next. Imagine having to face all that with the only person you've ever loved."

Reliving it like this hurt exactly as he had expected it to, but he'd run away from it long enough. "How'd I do?" He asked quietly, turning his head slightly to meet Suzy's eyes.

"You did good."

"You know, for four years, I never got that out. This is the first time I talked about Hara's death."

"She's not suffering anymore. You have to remember that," Suzy said, fully convinced of it. "I really believe that she's in a better place now. She must be sad that you're still in so much pain. I think…when she asked you not to forget, she meant to take good care of the memories you guys shared together. She would've wanted you to be happy."

Seungri looked up at the ceiling. He knew it, but it felt good to hear it from someone else. "You think so?"

"When you love someone…what you want the most is for that person to be happy right?" Suzy lightly touched his hair. "You carried a lot of pain in your heart for a long time. I'm sorry that you had to," she added in a quieter voice, pondering over it.

As Seungri watched Suzy's face, he felt that same familiar, overwhelming feeling. Only now he realized what it was. But he knew he couldn't say the words out loud until he let go of Hara completely. Suzy deserved to hear those words, the words women treasured so highly, in the right way.

"Let me go back," He said immediately, realizing everything now. He had to go back and say goodbye for the last time. "There's one last thing I need to do," he tried explaining. "I'll tell you everything when I come back."

Emotionally drained, she rested her head against the couch. There was more he couldn't say, but at least he was starting to open up. She had to be satisfied with that. With a slow nod, she met his gaze. For a long time, she just stared into his eyes, memorizing his every feature. Could he love her someday, she wondered? It seemed more possible now at least. That had to be enough, she said to herself.

When he held her close, she then said, "Then go."