Notes From Reviewer

Prompt

Since I don't think there is a title, I changed this section to 'prompt' since this was a prompt you received from what it seems. This part is a part you really can't be held accountable for since it was a request but I just wanted to say that a Chaebol (재벌) means a large business practically. It says Taehyung is a rich chaebol. So that practically means Taehyung IS a large business company. People using Korean terms usually leads to mistakes like this but I don't know, I figured I'd say something about it since... why not? 

Moving on, just reading the prompt makes me know that the plot (which won't be discussed in this section) is going to be cliche. It's just one of those cliche and unrealistic plots. Maids do exist, yes (my grandmother was one when she first came to this country years back) but the whole rich kid thing is just old and maids work mostly in hotels. Same with the whole "bully is bullying the person he likes then bam, one day he confesses" it's unrealistic. But as I said earlier, you can't be held accountable.

Plot

I don't get the first part- I actually said "What?" out loud and reread it just incase but... I still don't get it. He said "I want to go to bed," and then she replied saying "No-nothing, young master." and then she walks out. What was she saying nothing to? Maybe I'm just tired but I really don't get that part.

I'm only a few lines in and this really is cliche and just not original. I know you didn't have control over what is written down considering this WAS a request but still. Maids wouldn't call their workers "master" that's just really a weird kink at this point. Sure, you'd be respectful but master is really pushing it and all I think about is that "praise kink" and "master kink" that exist. I don't know what time period this really takes place in but in this time, I highly doubt people use that outside of the bedroom unless it's located in a certain country where things are more... strict, to say it nicely. You don't see maids in hotels saying anything like that to you.

Writing Style 

When it comes to writing style, it's mostly just dialogue. Dialogue is quite necessary or critical in many portions of a fanfic, I would know considering I put decents amount of dialogue to get a move on but there's also no detail. It's just explaining basic actions, when I add dialogue I put a lot of detail and it ends up being a paragraph, unless it's something I can't write a follow up for. Dialogue is just there, it doesn't give you anything besides what they're saying. Focusing on details is much more important than dialogue, just dialogue can get very boring after awhile.

Also there's a typo in the beginning. "Taehyung was lying on his king-sized bed. On of his arms covered his eyes."
> To make it better as a sentence, I'd say "Taehyung was lying on his king-sized bed, one of his arms covered his eyes." Instead of ending the sentence after the word bed, a comma would be better after it. Also, one was spelled as on, you just forgot the e.

Characterization 

Chorong sounds like a robot. The way she acts is almost ridiculous and I really can't see anyone acting that way or staying THAT close to someone who bullies or harrasses them, even if they "love" them. I don't see any love between them at all and really don't see how Chorong doesn't have head issues considering bullying does you up in many ways. So Chorong is quite unrealistic as a character and is not relateable to anyone. Plus the majority of maids work in hotels, not for an individual person.

All I can say about Taehyung is that he sounds like a rich who doesn't care. Like asking Chorong to strip was just weird and not really necessary. At the end, him doing a 180 personality change was just off and also uncalled for. But the prompter DID say they wanted a happy ending... 

Flow 

It went from him being an to him just loving her in two seconds at the end. There isn't much flow to it, it's just kinda there to put it that way. There's not much background story to either character. Like why the hell is Chorong a maid out of all jobs, most poor students/people work in like retail (points at myself) or a coffee shop/fast food. As I said, there just isn't much flow to it.

Personal Enjoyment 

Too cliche for me, plus I don't read straight things. But that's not the point, the main problem is definitely the cliche-ness and too much dialogue. The dialogue made me feel uninterested. I didn't feel like there was much story to it either and maybe there was and I missed the mark but from what I saw, it was just a oneshot following a prompt, that also didn't have much of a real story to it.