A lot of people may think that I have everything already. That I can get whatever I want and I can do whatever I wish to do. What these people don’t know is that, even though I can get or buy everything that I want, I can’t seem to do whatever I want to do. I’m locked in a world where every movement is calculated, that once you do something wrong, it will backfire bigger than you expected it to be. Yes, I’m happy, but I still feel so incomplete. The happiness that I’m feeling is limited and there are times where it’s covered with fear and doubt. I’m free, but I’m not as free as most people are. If only I can be them even just for one day, I will definitely give everything I have just for it to happen.

My life has now been changed by an angel. Well, she doesn’t want to be counted as one but to me, she’s really an angel that God accidentally sent to make me see the world in a different perspective. I don’t know, but she’s really the woman that I pictured to end up with and share my forever. Our past isn’t beautiful at all. I’ve hurt her and if only she knows how I regretted it. I’m one stupid boy who played a good girl’s heart. All I want now is her forgiveness.

“Hello” it’s still so early. Whoever this is, I will slit his/her neck for waking me up.

There was silence on the other end, making me more pissed “Hello” I repeated.

“Open the door…NOW! Quick!”

“OH!” I jerked up, zoned out for a while, got back to my senses, got out of bed then rushed out to the door.

This is just so unbelievable. If this is a dream, I don’t want to wake up anymore.

“Good Morning!” she greeted cheerfully, making me smile from ear to ear.

I don’t know how Billie got here and how in hell she know where I’m living, but this is so great. Seeing her first thing in the morning is just so wonderful and her angelic smile is enough for me to claim that this day is going to be one heck of a day.

“OMO! What are you doing here? I didn’t know that you know where I live” I told her.

She chuckled “Jiyong….it’s so easy to know” she said then sighed “My boss is a good friend of yours and according to him….he’s a regular visitor here….I got your address from him….shocked?” she is really the cutest human being that I’ve ever seen.

I giggled “Ahhh yeah” I said while scanning her face in awe.

This woman is just so full of surprises. Months ago, she’s so awkward to me and it all changed in just a snap. She’s a little comfortable with me now and counts me as a friend already.

“Mind helping me with these?” she looked down and I followed her gaze.

Woah! She’s got lot of bags. It looks like she bought the whole grocery store. I don’t know what she’s up to this time, but I have a feeling that this is going to be fun once again.

We brought the bags in and man, they are heavy.

“Wow!” she said in awe upon entering my apartment.

Her head is going from left to right with her eyes and mouth wide open. She looks like a little kid who is amazed by what she’s seeing.

“This way” I told her and she followed me.

“Just put it down there” I pointed at the dining table.

She smiled at me then placed the bags down “This is a cool bachelor’s pad” she said while settling down on a chair.

I chuckled “Is it?” I asked then looked around.

She smirked “Jiyong…this is one of the most beautiful pads that I’ve ever been to…seriously….you’ve got a lot of wonderful things in here”

“Thanks” I said with a proud smile on my face.

Silence filled the room. She’s still admiring the place while I’m admiring her face. I just realized, this woman really looks like a doll. You can’t even see any flaws at all. If you’re going to look at little Billie, you will not even think that she’s going to be this beautiful once she grows up. I’m not saying that little Billie is really ugly, what I mean is, she really improved a lot.

“Did you buy the whole mart?” I asked while pulling out all her purchases.

She laughed “I bought a lot because I want to feed you a lot today”

My body frozen and my heart beat so fast upon hearing what she just said. I think I blushed and I’m wishing that she didn’t see it.

“Aigoo….do you even know how to cook?” I asked.

She smiled widely at me as if telling that she isn’t.

I sighed heavily then chuckled “You don’t know how to cook” I said and she gave me a smile once again.

“I’m so fond in watching cooking shows you know….so…even though I haven’t tried it yet…I believe that I can pull it off coz I know how it works in one way or another” she said with confidence.

I laughed so hard “Alright….I’ll trust my kitchen to you….but please….don’t burn my apartment….it took me years to make it look this good” I told her.

Her laugh is like music to my ears. Billie is really a special woman and I’m thankful that she’s in my life again.

“uhmmm….why don’t you go back to sleep while I prepare breakfast?” she asked upon noticing that I’m just watching her struggle in the kitchen.

“No…I’m all good….I’m not sleepy anyway” this is a lie because I just got home from rehearsals a couple of hours ago and I’m dead sleepy.

“You’re lying Jiyong….I can easily say that you are sleepy and tired…look at yourself in the mirror….you look like a zombie….your dark circles are so visible” she said then touched my shoulders.

Shivers ran down my spine upon feeling her warm hands on my skin. She looked straight at me “You don’t look good at all right now” she said and I just gave her a sigh. She turned me around then pushed me out of the kitchen “Get some sleep first….I’ll just wake you up once I’m done battling with the stove”

I laughed then gave a nod “OK….I’ll do that….BUT” I walked closer to her “Don’t burn my kitchen…call me if you need help….clear?” I asked and she rolled her eyes.

“Clear” she answered.

Billie is making me fall in love with her more. Seriously, I feel like I have a girlfriend who is so sweet and loving. I know that she’s not aware that she’s totally making me crazy over her, but she seriously does for I’m head over heels in-love with her. Nobody has ever done these things to me, not even my ex-girlfriends. Yes, they do visit me, but none of them has ever made me feel this special.

“I’m in-love with her and even though I know that we are impossible right now….in time….we’ll soon realize that we can be lovers too” I told myself while looking up at the ceiling.

I told myself that I will not make a move on her until she forgives me. Yes, we are cool now but there’s still a part of her that hates me or shall I say, the old me. The memory of what I’ve done is still fresh in her mind and up until now she still gets hurt every time she’s reminded of it and even though she hasn’t admitted that she’s little Billie, I can see in her that there’s still a bit of hate whenever she looks in my eyes.

“Jiyong”

I love everything about her, even her voice. This is really a good wake-up call. I swear.

“Jiyong…wake up….it’s almost lunch” her hand is on my arm. It feels odd, but she’s drawing circles on it with her finger.

I opened my eyes and saw her looking at me with the most beautiful smile that I’ve ever seen “Hey” she said while my arm gently.

My heart is banging my chest so hard “Wash up while I prepare your food…alright?” she said in her most angelic voice.

I gave a nod “OK” I replied, receiving a smile from her.

She’s getting softer and softer every time we meet and this is a good thing. According to Bunny, Billie is sweet but she’s not showy at all. She rarely shows concern as well. To cut it short, the woman that I’m with now is so far from the woman that her best friend for a lot of years now, knows. Maybe to her family and friends she’s not expressive at all, but to me, she is and I love every inch of it.

“WOW!” I said upon seeing a food tray on my bed.

“Brunch in bed” she said proudly.

I stared at her for a while then walked to my bed “You made all these?” I asked, receiving a nod from her.

“Seriously?” I asked again and she smirked.

“Yeah!” she answered, making me laugh.

OK. The food is not that great, which isn’t bad for she’s a first timer. Truth is, the food looks edible but once you put it in your mouth already, you’ll realize that it’s not and because of my love to the person who did this, I endured its bad taste and just pretended that it’s the most delicious food that I’ve ever eaten.

“Omo!” I spit out the last chunk of chicken.

She looked at me in shock “Why? What’s the matter?” she asked.

“Nothing” I answered with a smile on my face.

“Jiyong….I know