(W) You Calmed Me Down
A Farewell
Hey Jjong, my baby dino. First, let me say this. I miss you. I miss seeing you in front of me at your concerts. I miss listening to your voice live. I miss your lame jokes, I miss your big smiles.
The first time I knew you, it was Replay of course. I was not really impressed by you at first. Your solo song "Y si fuera hella" got me into you. Your distinct vocal, your melodious tones, your high notes, they blew my mind. Then i got to see your personality through Hello baby. It was a great show.
When i listened your recent solo songs, I feel your sadness, when I saw your concert, I kinda feel there was something wrong, but i didn’t notice it was that dangerous.
Dear Jjong, I was depressed myself back in my teens to my 24th. I self-harmed for a year. I've struggled enough that I felt like to kill myself. Thinking that I was alone. I miraculously stopped myself after I listened to 'Breathe' which you wrote. You calmed me down, I know it sounds so cheesy. I think. I searched for help, thanks to you. Now that being said, I regret that you didn’t feel the same way. If only I knew you personally. If only I could hug you when you had your thoughts back then. If only I were there when you ended you life.
Now that you've gone, it still hurts Jjong. But we are moving forward, remembering you in our hearts. Now that you became the hero, not for your action, but the afterwards, people can speak up their depression, they seek help. You help people. And now, you should smile in heaven. You should dance there. Sing your heart out, scream your happiness. I am sad here, but happy that you are not in pain anymore. Farewell Kim Jonghyun. You are always in our hearts.
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