In The Midst Of The War
A FarewellDear Jonghyun I was never a Shawol.
I looked upon Shinee and their songs although I never became into them like how I was with SNSD.
But why does everything hurt now? Maybe it's because of the SM connection? Maybe because of the emotional connection? Maybe because of the mere fact of someone suiciding? I don't know, really. But it hurts. It hurts so much.
I never knew you. But I am sorry. I'm sorry you had to go through this. That, in the midst of the war you were battling, you chose to end it by ending yourself.
I'm sorry. I never saw it. The signs. The messages. I'm so, so sorry. Maybe it's because I could feel the pain you were feeling..? Or was it just the trail of the sadness you left when you said goodbye? I never knew and I will never know.
I'm so sorry because I should've supported you when I had the chance. You don't deserve this. You were an angel. You deserve to be happy You deserve to smile. You deserve the love Shawols give you no matter what. You deserve to see the talent you have been pouring out to the world.
I may not have been a Shawol although these words stuck in my heart. These five words are stuck in my grieving heart. I could have save you. But I didn't so I'm sorry.
You've done well, Kim Jonghyun... You've done extremely well... Now you deserve to rest.
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