Kim Jonghyun, Kim Jonghyun, let us remember this name and the person who take this name.
Kim Jonghyun is someone who I looked up as a person, he is not my bias, hell, I am not stanning SHINEE, but I just like them in particular and take them as a bigbro evem though I am a girl, well except for Taemin and Jonghyun. But this one guy, that infires me so much, that is very talented on his music, who will make me perk up just by his name, who I love his very attitude even if I don't know whether he was just trying to act strong at the time or was he really happy at that time, him, who is really attractive, y, sassy, and sensitive that I can't help but falling into.

The realization that Jonghyun isn't there across the sea living his life had just dawnd on me this afternoon. I've onown the news since yesterday, but that didn't feel real. I didn't feel remorse. I didn't pause and think what is the meaning of death here. It just felt like someone I didn't know die and that's it.
But this afternoon, with the instagram post every idol was making, and the translation of his last note to the world, and that foto of him surrounded by flowers, and the videos of idol going to his public service in all black, it suddenly became so real, very real, that i cried in a public place.

I guess I am a slow one.

Realizing that he is not there across the sea. Realizing he is not there in his studio working hard and do whatever he was always doing. Realizing that currently his soul, his soul, is not here on earth but somewhere in another world. Realizing that he is not here, with us, that the chance to met him has ceased to -0,0001%. Realizing that once again, a very talented, lovely human has ended his life because of depression and it escaped the eyes of those who are closest to him, dearest to him.

THIS is why the first think that I am going to tell an idol when I meet them is to love yourself first, love your family, survive, then make music if you feel it, don't get pressured, we will be waiting for it even if it takes eternity for you to make music or even if you stopped making it altogether and just decided to go awol from the world, just one thing, don't die on us, don't die because of us, don't die on me.

This might be my last note regarding to him and his death. He is such a bright human, he shines so bright that the shadow and fire in his heart has become so great that it's consuming him. I hope this won't happen again, ever. But, I guess that is impossible to happen with the power of 1 measly person that is me.

For SHAWOLS and those who are affected by his death, be strong. Friends, let's be strong together, life must and will go on. Start making a difference by being aware of those around you, being aware of depression around you.

We are not that weak if we are together.

Depreassin can be prevented, suicide can be stopped. So many people has preached about it below, read it, implement it, and save those who are closest and dearest to you, before reaching out to the idols that we love. Most importantly, SAVE YOURSELF FIRST. I by all means am no professional, but please, please, REACH OUT TO ME IF YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEMS AND NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO. Maybe I can help, maybe I can not, but let us think about the solution together and act on your problems together. It is about you, it is not in the slightest about me. By surviving, you are doing a favor for yourself. You are a great person.
#?
#REACHOUTTOME
#LOVE YOURSELF, LOVE MYSELF♡