A/N -I am so blank  today and can't even think of writing the follow up on my stories...It is either I am so loaded of all the things that is going on around me or just being empty.it is not even my life but then the people around you sort of influence you one way or another,I think I took everything in and somehow,got full without me knowing it...I need to discharge this negative feeling of mine.

Anyway...I am writing this story for someone....special...AND hoping she get something out of this...a kick ,a laugh or some sort of inspiration...and nothing far from being hopeful for the future....I love you girl...and i guess this is also for me...

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The rain is puttering on our roof as she listened to the sound.It was a constant pitter patter sound as she listen to it more intently. She stood up from the bed and look out at the window.It is very dark outside,she could barely made out the view outside,the wind hollered and the big trees in front swaying to the strong winds.The God up there must be mad or something...crying in despair? She wondered why?

She turned around and looked at the clock hanging on the wall , it says past eleven o clock.She didn't know that it was that quite late.She must have fallen asleep,she thought .Still the house is so quiet and yes so empty. Jaejoong is not home yet.He should be home by now.Unless,he passed by his friends or went out somewhere.But where can he go at this type of weather?She bit her lips at the thought .

She went to the kitchen to checked on the dinner that she cooked earlier. And sure enough ,they are cold.He must have eaten already ,as she put them in the plastic container to put it away in the fridge. It has been going on for sometime now,him going home so late and yet if she asked him,all she gets is an angry reply  from him.She usually just looked at him with a glare but sure enough,she keep mum about all this things.She wants to say a lot of things,but then....something is holding her back.

What if this time,he really wants out? Did they really fall out of love already?? So soon? Two years of living togeher and building dreams together,she was hopeful that it will lead to something more....to a more permanent state.But this means that their trials have hit the miss and failed and now  the experiment is now null and void,only to start all over again???But will she be part of that trial run again???

If only emotions are just trial runs in an experiment and you can just discard once you miss the targeted results,but then,human emotions are so complex that it is hard to understand and less hard to master....Studies after studies,still nothing is conclusive about all this thing called love....How one overcome the hurt and the pain from such failure??? She hoped that she can just walk away and never to look back and think about the whole thing after...

Soon enough,the door opens and then came Jaejoong,the reason why she is  living and the reason for her existence,at least that what she thought until now.He still looked so handsome.Sometimes when she is staring at him when he is sleeping,she wondered how can she be so lucky to have him in her life.She just loves him to much,and she will do anything and everything for him,just to make him happy.She will be a slave to him if he wants to,just to make have him and to make him happy.

He avoided her gaze,once he went in.he didn't know that she was still awake at this time.He wants to avoid her tonight.If there is onething that Jae hates is confrontation.Isn't all men hates confrontations when the time comes.They want everything easy and uncomplicated and yet they always do the most complicated things in life.

"I didn't know you are still up." he said."I am sorry I am late,the weather is terrible outside."

"Did you have dinner yet?" she asked."I just put the food away just now,but if you want I can still heat it up for you."

"No,it is alright,I have eaten already." he said as he walked straight to the bedroom.

She followed him there.She watched him as she took off his shirt and threw them on the laundry bin.he was unmindful of her as he went to the bathroom to wash up.She just stood there watching him,watching his every movement.She was still standing there when he came back from the bathroom.

"Are you just gonna stand there? I am tired,I still have an early day tomorrow." he said as he fluffed himself in the bed.She sat on the side of the bed as she looked at him....maybe it is the time to have all the cards open on the table.Maybe this is it and maybe this is now.

"Jae,we need to talk.We cannot postpone this anymore.I want to hear what do you have to say?" she said.She was surprised at the calmness of her voice,like she was not even part of the whole drama....

Jaejoong looked at her,with a surprised look in his face."What do you mean?Can't we discuss it tomorrow or someday when i don't have to go to work the next day?" he asked with the sound of irritation in his voice.

"No,I want it now,and I really mean ii now.." she said."I don't think, I can live another day like this anymore."

"I told you,I am no good at this thing.Commitment and living together.I want my freedom.Don't choke me ,you are choking me." he said ,as he stood up and looked at the window.She looked at him and didn't know that her tears came...as she wiped them away as soon as it fell.She doesn't want him to see it.

"But I thought,you love me? You told me you love me.That is why I give my all to you.I loved you." she said,as tears poured again but this time she tried not to hide it anymore.Hell he was hurting her,and he might as well know it.

"I do love you but I never promised you anything. I said i will try but...I guess it is not working up for the two of us.I still like my freedom,more than anything else." Jaejoong said."I have been meaning to tell you..but.."

"But you don't have the balls to tell me.is that it ? All along you are just stringing me along.For what ??? For just a roll in the hay.So as to bed me?" as she slapped him on the face...Jaejoong stared at her after the sting in her face.he can see the hatred in her eyes.He tried to hold her....but she pushed him away.This time she is the one pushing him away from her.

"It is not that way...I really do love you.I loved you from the start...Please don't hate me that much.I did love you." he said as he looked at her with such a sorry look.

"Yes you did and that is over now, you don't love me anymore .And so do I .I did love you too ,I did love you too more than you ever loved me." she said.

"Does it mean this is the end for us?" he asked.She nodded her head...and smiled at him through the tears...

"I am leaving you now,for I can't wait another day to start anew.Goodbye Jaejoong." as she stood up and left without looking back at him.She wiped the tears on her face and smiled at herself...it is not the end for her...There will be another day after this and tomorrow the sun might be even shining unlike now......To let it all out is so freeing and it is quite a happy feeling...Finally she can look forward for another new day for herself.....full of bright mornings and hopeful of the new tomorrows...