CX

"It's not worth it."

You replied without even thinking about. Sure, you wanted to know about Myungsoo. You wanted to know what was going on inside of that head of his but also what from his past could have possibly caused those kinds of thoughts. His present self was more important. You knew that. Those words came out of your mouth towards Woohyun. Yet, with Myungsoo, it was different. It was as though his past was something he was keeping hidden. Not telling anyone. It was as though it was something he wanted to tell but couldn’t and it was eating away at him bit by bit. If the other werewolves’ knew, they never mentioned it. So then were you simply being kept in the dark or did no one else know either?

Then again, why would he say he wanted you to ask?

Did he really think you were just some crazy human? Is that why he had no problem telling you about his past? Unlike Woohyun who feared you would view him differently afterward.

This wasn't good. You were comparing two people that weren't comparable in any way; Woohyun and Myungsoo. But wasn't it the same with the other werewolves? You knew no one else’s past besides Woohyun’s. Yet it didn't seem to bother them enough to make them act as though they were behind a thick stage curtain for fear of displaying to the audience that was the rest of the world who they were. This was Myungsoo. Hidden behind a pitch black curtain with the shimmering of stars scattered here and there.

You were given the chance to pull this heavy curtain back. You could take it. But you wouldn't. It didn't seem right. Myungsoo's questions came out due to his surprise you actually shut up and moved on for once. This is what you told yourself. Nothing else made more sense than this.

"Tell me when you want to tell me."

Myungsoo was quiet, as though he was pondering if he should. Then again, you were never sure about what he was thinking so maybe he was just thinking about how psychotic you were again. Either way, in the end, he stood up from the ground and continued walking forward down the hall. Towards the darkness that engulfed the way forward.

It looks like he solved the matter without a word.

As per usual Myungsoo-style.

When he wanted to tell you? When exactly would such a time come? He rather be forced into telling it before he ever let it willingly roll off of his tongue and slip from his lips. So then was it that he wanted you to force him to tell you? Should he just go ahead and say it now?

He didn’t look towards you and instead stared straight forward into the darkness that was at the end of the hallway. The lights were out there but it didn’t bother him. His eyes adjusted naturally. His mind seemed to clear in the darkness. He heard a bang and stopped in place. He didn’t have to turn to know what had happened. You had tripped and fallen down. It was too dark for you to see.

He laughed. Not at you. But at how accurately this seemed to depict the reality of his situation. He could see perfectly in the dark while you tripped and stumbled over the slightest of things, akin to being blind. He felt his resolve to speak growing by the second. He remembered something you said earlier. He spun it, twisted it, making it his own. Then, he said it clearly, his voice resounding in the darkness around him.

“I’m not my mother’s son.”

You were motionless now. He heard the slow beating of your heart. It hadn’t quite hit you yet. You didn’t understand what his words meant. His lips curved upwards in the darkness as he his heel.

You gulped down as you heard his footsteps nearing you. You were sitting on your knees on the ground. You were going to stand back up moments ago but then he spoke up, freezing you in place.

He wasn’t his mother’s son.

There was the obvious implication of what that meant. Biologically, he wasn’t his mother’s son. Adoption? Step-mother? Those were the two options but neither one seemed exactly right. What confused you more was that he actually told you that at all.

Your confusion all but disappeared from you mind as you felt something grab onto your underarm. You were lifted with a single pull and you felt your head spin from the sudden movement. Before you could question what was going on, you felt something brush against your hand. Something warm. Incredibly so. It lasted only a moment however before you felt a tug on the end of the sleeve of Myungsoo’s jacket. The tug caused you to start walking forward at a steady pace.

Myungsoo was leading you through the darkness.

Your eyes couldn’t adjust no matter how hard you tried. So instead, you closed them and relied solely on him to guide you.

“I am my father’s son.”

His voice seemed much clearer now that your eyes were closed and once more, he had taken up that soothing tone from before. You didn’t speak. You stayed quiet because you didn’t want to ruin this. This moment in which Myungsoo was telling you about himself of his own volition.

“But I don’t miss my father.”

He spoke another short sentence. His tone of voice wasn’t weary. He wasn’t sad. He was speaking as he always had. As though each statement he said was a fact he couldn’t change.

“He’s a businessman.”

You felt the tug on his jacket shift to the left. The hallway had apparently ended and Myungsoo had decided to take a left. Whether there was a right turn or not didn’t cross your mind. Myungsoo was the one deciding where you two would go amidst the darkness. If that took you to the left, so be it.

“I never was the business type.”

You felt the tug cease. He had stopped walking. You let your eyes open. You could see now, only dimly, the outline of his body that was a lighter shade of black. He seemed much closer now than before when your eyes were closed. Was he always this close? Why were you only noticing now? It seemed as though he was facing you from how near his voice was now.

“So I left them. My father and my mother both.”

You felt a sharp pain in your chest. It was odd. You were happy to finally start to get to know more about Myungsoo but at the same time, your chest felt like a stack of books was being piled on top of it. He left them. His father and mother.

A small voice in the back of your mind whispered to you a question you didn’t understand.

Would he leave you too one day?

For some reason, the question didn’t seem unreasonable. What about the werewolves then? The hunters? Would they leave one day as well? You felt as though the answer to that question was an affirmative. Yet why? Why did you feel as though you were reaching an impending separation from them?

As you focused once more on Myungsoo’s figure in the darkness, you asked him a question that had nothing to do with your inner thoughts because for some reason, it felt as though talking about that was taboo. Something you couldn’t bring up right now.

“Your favorite color really isn’t black is it?”

“No. It’s not.”

He replied and the sound of screeching metal caused you to flinch. In a moment, the hallway was filled with light. Your eyes had gotten used to the darkness from moments ago and as such this new source of light blinded you. Disorientated, you had to choice but to follow once more the tugging on the sleeve of Myungsoo’s jacket.

You covered your face with your other arm as he pulled you further into the light. You looked through squinted eyes to find that you were in another hallway once more lit by dim light. How long had you been walking in the darkness that such dim light seemed so bright?

You felt the tug on his jacket sleeve cease. You blinked a few times to get used to the new light around you. “Myungsoo?” You questioned, finding that he once more had his back to you. When he turned, your lips parted on reflex. It felt as though you were looking at someone you didn’t recognize.

He wasn’t the same Myungsoo whose expressions you couldn’t see in the darkness just moments ago. Now, he was back to being the real Myungsoo.

But was this the real Myungsoo? This stoic, sharp-tongued, blunt, un-phased by anything Myungsoo? It seemed more like a mask he wore. Perhaps a mask he always wore. For some reason, the Myungsoo who was with you in the darkness was different. You couldn’t help the feeling that that was the real Myungsoo. The one who only came out when no one was looking. Shrouded by his dark, star speckled curtain at all other times. He was standing behind it once more now.

Black may have not been his favorite color but unsurprisingly, it suited him.

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A/N:

Back to Myungsoo and Hyunjoo for this chapter! So we learn a bit about Myungsoo but he's as vague as always. Anyone else enjoy this metaphorical chapter as much as I do?

In response to one of my commenters, I am going to clarify the situation which occured in the last chapter. Block B (with the exception of B-Bomb) found out that Hyunjoo was missing in chapter 105. Infinite found out in chapter 104. However, Infinite never told B-Bomb that Hyunjoo was missing. At the end of chapter 109, he finds out and Block B has arrived at the werewolves' home after finding out about Hyunjoo. So chapter 105 takes place on the same day as 109. Hopefully I cleared things up for everyone.

I didn't fall alseep this time to Infinite. So I'm Improving in a way? Not sure if this is a good thing.