Seoul, South Korea – October 12, 2016

KIM JONGIN | KAI

       I have been Sehun’s friend since we were little. We basically grew up together and knew the secrets of each other. And of course, I’m very much aware of what happened between him and Joohyun. That’s why when I saw Joohyun in our school, I tried my best to hide her from Sehun because I know that my bestfriend haven’t moved on yet. I talked to Joohyun and asked her to transfer out of school but she said that she wanted to stay and pursue Sehun. She said that she still loves him but I still can’t understand that logic. I mean, she left my bestfriend all of a sudden and now, she wants to go back to him. I don’t really understand her that’s why I spent most of my times with her because I was still hoping that she would transfer out and leave Sehun alone. I don’t want to see Sehun miserable again. She has done enough damage to him and I will not tolerate such things again. But right now, that’s none of my concern especially now that I just found out that A is actually pissed off with me.

      “Can’t you see that I’m jealous over that perfect girl?!” Ayaka shouted, fuming.

      “W-what?” I asked, stuttering.

      She’s… jealous?

      “Did you not hear me?” she asked as she glared at me, “You’ve been with her these past few days and you would leave me all alone, wondering where you are. I would always overthink about everything Kai.” She muttered as her voice cracks and I just want to beat myself up for making Ayaka feel this way. “Sometimes I would even think if you’re letting go of me and going for that girl.”

      “What?!” I asked, surprised, “What the hell were you thinking, A?” I asked.

      I can’t believe this, I mean, why would she think that? Doesn’t she know how much I love her?! I will never ditch her for anyone. When I was with Joohyun, I was constantly thinking of her—thinking if she has eaten already or if she went home safely.

      “Well, that’s what you’re making me feel Kim Jongin.” She muttered as I saw how her eyes got glassy and seeing her cry because of me just breaks my heart.

      “A…” I called as I pulled her into a tight hug. myself, I just can’t believe I made Ayaka cry. I’m such an , argh! “I… I would never let you go for anybody else.” I whispered into her ears as she cried into my chest and I couldn’t help but to hear my heart breaking. This is one of my nightmares—seeing Ayaka cry because of me. “I love you so much and I will never leave you.” I muttered, “I’m really sorry, A.” I apologized as I rubbed her back as she continues to cry.

      “B-but you…” she muttered, trying hard to control her breathing and she was trying not to stutter but failed.

      I break away from the hug and cupped her cheeks as I stared into her beautiful brown orbs, “Look at me, A.” I exclaimed as she looks back at me, “I love you, okay? I will never leave you and if ever I will, you will see me coming back into your arms.” I told her as I wiped the tears away from her cheeks. “Now, stop over thinking and trust me, okay?” I asked her and she just nodded.

      I smiled and kissed her forehead. I just couldn’t help but to admire Ayaka right now. I don’t know why but I sound retarded but really, I just fell in love with her all over again. I love how she wrinkles her nose and how red she gets whenever she cries but don’t get me wrong, I hate seeing her cry. I just can’t help it. She just looks beautiful in whatever she does.

      “So you’re not leaving me?” she asked while she buried her face into my chest and I just chuckled.

      “No, silly,” I answered back, “I love you so much that I can’t leave you.” I exclaimed.

      “But tell me, what is that girl to you?” she asked me.

      I sighed and smiled, “Come on, let’s sit down first.” I muttered as I led her to the bench while she leaned on my shoulders. “You see, Joohyun is Sehun’s ex-girlfriend.” I started and she gasped, staring into my eyes.

      “What?!” she asked, surprised.

      “Yeah, she’s Sehun’s ex-girlfriend and they didn’t end well. That’s why I was spending my time with Joohyun to convince her to leave the school and leave Sehun alone.” I told her, “But she told me that she still loves Sehun and she’s not leaving.”

      “What… what happened between them?” she asked but I just sighed.

      “I don’t think I’m in the right place to tell you their story.” I exclaimed, “Ask Sehun,” I smiled and she just nodded. I looked at Ayaka and I know how exhausted she is after everything that happened today so an idea popped into my mind. “Do you want to grab some ice cream?” I asked and her eyes immediately lit up. “I know how exhausted you are today and I want to make up for all the days that I have been absent so, let’s have some fun today.” I told her.

      “That would be great!” she exclaimed happily.

      After that, we decided to go to the ice cream shop where she brought me last time when I was broken hearted with Sooyeon. And now, I just can’t believe that we will be here, together—I mean, together, as in ‘us’.

      “Here you go,” I told A as I placed a chocolate ice cream in front of her.

      “You actually ordered two chocolate ice creams?” she laughed.

      “Well yeah, you don’t expect me to order another banana split now, do you?” I kid and she just laughed.

      “Oh, I can still remember clearly the time when you stole my chocolate ice cream. I hated you for that.” She muttered as she scoops an ice cream and eats it.

      “Well, I still thank you for making me happy that day.” I muttered, “Anyway, what have you been doing when I was with Joohyun?” I asked.

      “I have been with the gang for almost all the time but mostly, I’m with Sehun.” She answered, “Thank your best friend because he never left me while you were away.” She told me and I quickly put that in mind.

      “I really do need to thank him.” I smiled, “Well, he should thank me too. I was doing him a favor.” I kid.

      “How about you, what did you do with… what’s her name again?” she asked.

      “Joohyun,” I answered, “Nothing, I was just making sure she won’t bump with Sehun or whatever. I saw how broken Sehun was when she left him and I don’t want her to make Sehun’s life miserable again.”

      “I don’t really know what happened between them but with the way you’re referring to Joohyun, I might hate her.” She sighed.

      “What? Why?” I asked.

      I mean, I never really thought of Ayaka hating someone so this got me shocked.

      “She’s hurting one of my friends and you know how much I’m protective over them.” She explained, “I know that Sehun is a really nice guy and he doesn’t deserve any bad things coming his way so, if that girl is hurting Sehun, I might hate her.”

      I smiled at Ayaka and just nodded, “Don’t worry about Sehun. He can handle himself. I will talk to him later so we can clear things up.” I exclaimed and she just nodded.

      After eating our ice creams, we decided to go home since Ayaka was really drained out and she wanted to sleep all day. I wanted to spend more time with her but I want her to rest and then I would take her on a date. I accompanied her home and went to her room with her. She said that she wanted to see me before she sleeps so I just agreed. I love how clingy she is right now because it takes a blue moon for her to act like how she is acting right now, but don’t get me wrong. I love how she is today, I would even pay a fortune for her to be like this everyday.

      “Haah, home at last,” she sighed as she went straight to her bed and lay down on her bed.

      “You should change before you sleep, A.” I exclaimed as I fixed her bag into the rack and sat beside her.

      “I’m too tired,” she mumbled, her voice was muffled by the pillow covering her face.

      “Come on,” I told her, “You’ll be more comfortable.” I exclaimed as I stood up and went to her closet, grabbing some pink sweatshirt and black leggings. “Change so you can sleep.” I muttered and placed the clothes beside her.

      “Fine,” she surrendered as she grabbed the clothes I picked up for her and went to her comfort room.

      I actually love taking care of Ayaka, it just makes my heart flutter and I don’t know, I love the idea of it. Like, I know how lazy she gets whenever she comes home from school so she sometimes forget to change clothes before sleeping so I always remind her to change before she sleeps. Or how clumsy she gets whenever she’s cooking her food so I sometimes help her so that she won’t burn the house down, or maybe when she forgets to turn off the aircondition whenever she’s leaving the house so I always drop by her room and check if she had turned off everything. There are many more things that I love about her, even the smallest things.

      “Can I sleep now?” she asked as she went back to her bed.

      “Yeap,” I smiled.

      She lied down beside me while I sat beside her, staring at her beautiful face.

      “Sing for me,” she exclaimed with her eyes closed.

      “You know I can’t,” I laughed.

      “Please?” she asked.

      And you guys know me, I can’t stand that look in her eyes so I finally surrendered and shook my head, “Fine, what do you want me to sing?” I asked.

      “Anything,” she smiled, “I just want to sleep.”

      “Okay then,” I smiled as I hear the loud beatings of my heart.

      For the record, this would be my first time singing for Ayaka so I wanted it to be special. I decided to just sing my favorite song, ‘Perfect’ by Ed Sheeran.

      “I found a love for me. Darling just dive right in and follow my lead.” My voice was quivering and my heart was beating like crazy. I’m so embarrassed right now but I really wanted to sing for her and I don’t know why. “Well I found a girl beautiful and sweet. I never knew you were the someone waiting for me.” but I guess, I can do anything that can make Ayaka happy and now, she wants me to sing so I obliged. “'Cause we were just kids when we fell in love, not knowing what it was. I will not give you up this time.” It’s just wonderful that this song is actually the very words that I want to tell Ayaka right now. I want to assure her that I will not leave her… I will not give her up. “But darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own and in your eyes you're holding mine.” I just wish that I could be his man sooner. I just can’t wait for that day to come… when I can finally tell the world that Ayaka is mine. “Baby, I'm dancing in the dark with you between my arms. Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song when you said you looked a mess. I whispered underneath my breath but you heard it,” I smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear and muttered, “Darling, you look perfect tonight.”

      I stared at her and the silence where the only thing that you would hear. I smiled and kissed her forehead, “I can’t wait for you to be my girlfriend,” I whispered under my breath, a smile tugging into my lips. “I love you always,”

      I finally stood up and decided to leave because I know that she’s probably asleep right now. I left her room and was about to go down when I felt someone hugged me from behind.

      “Yes,” a girl’s voice exclaimed and I know exactly, who she is.

      “A?” I asked as I tried to turn to her but she just hugged me tighter.

      “Yes,” she whispered but loud enough for me to hear.

      “Yes?” I asked, not understanding what she was saying, “What do you mean?” I asked.

      “Yes, I will be your girlfriend.” she muttered and I just can’t help but to feel the loud beatings of my heart.

      I turned to her and she was just looking down.

      “What did you say?” I asked as I cupped her face and looked at her face but she wasn’t looking at me.

      I don’t know if I’m dreaming right now or if I’m hearing things but did she really…

      “I said I want to be your girlfriend,” she exclaimed as she finally stared into my eyes, “I love you too, and for the rest of our forever,”

      I thought that butterflies in your stomach were all fictional and the feeling of cloud nine would never exist but Ayaka proved me wrong. I stared into her face and memorized everything… her beautiful doe-like eyes, her pretty nose and lips, and the wonderful soul that lies behind her orbs. This girl is finally mine and I don’t know what happened next but all I know was that I pulled her closer to me and claimed her lips. I don’t know what the future holds for us but I have faith in what I see. And I see her in my future, together with me.

Author's message ♥

Hello babies! I know that it has been almost a month since I updated. I'm really sorry because I was so busy with organizing my debut and all so I can't really update and write for you guys, plus, my laptop's keyboard is broken right now. So yeah, I hope you guys understand and I hope that you will continue on supporting my books! And since I wanted to make-up for everything that I have missed, here's an awesome chapter for everyone! I hope you guys liked my update and if you do, please do subscribe and upvote. And ofcourse, tell me what you guys think in the comment section!

With lots of love, Jihyun ♣

1 John 4:8 - Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.