Seoul, South Korea – September 30, 2016

LEE JIYEON | AYAKA

      It’s already dismissal time and still, Gayoung’s words are ringing at the back of my head like a sick tape. “If you just know…” I mean, what does she mean by that? I asked her many times but she just wouldn’t tell me. Everything that’s happening right now is just giving me headache so I decided to go home early today. I didn’t waste any minute staying in school because I might see Kai or Gayoung might bug me again. I had enough for the day so I’ll just rest at home and forget about everything. I was walking my way out of the school when I spot Sehun’s car parked beside a mango tree. Sehun was nowhere in sight and I bet he’s still at his classroom, probably flirting with his classmates. I didn’t know why but I suddenly found myself waiting for him as I sat beside his car. I guess I just need someone to talk to, a new set of advice that could probably help me. I also miss him anyway, together with Chanyeol. I miss their laughters and constant bickering.

      I sighed, “I don’t really know what to do now.” I mumbled under my breath.

      “Jiyeon?” someone called.

      I immediately stood up and met Sehun’s eyes and saw a girl student together with him.

      “W-what are you doing here?” he asked.

      “I c-came to talk to you b-but…” I muttered as I looked at the girl, “I’ll just tell you next time. You guys go,” I smiled as I decided to leave but Sehun quickly stopped me as he held my arms.

      “N-no,” he exclaimed. He turned to the girl and smiled apologetically, “Sohee, I’m sorry. I need to talk with Jiyeon. It’s really important.” He muttered, “I’ll make it up to you tomorrow.”

      “B-but…” the girl muttered.

      “I promise,” Sehun exclaimed, “I’ll bring you to the VIP section, that’s a promise.”

      “R-really?!” the girl’s eyes lit up with excitement and Sehun just nodded.

      “Yeah but for today, let’s cancel first the plan.” Sehun exclaimed and the girl finally agreed.

      “See you tomorrow oppa,” she beamed as she waved him goodbye.

      Sehun finally turned to me and pulled me into a hug, “Where have you been all this time?” he asked.

      Aaw, how I miss Sehun so much, I guess he did really grow into my heart like one of my brother. He’s such a cute guy and I wish I have a brother like him—a twin brother.

      I just sighed and hugged him back, “I need someone to talk to,” I muttered and Sehun just nodded.

      Sehun parted from the hug and opened the car for me. We went inside his car and decided to go to his house since I’m not in the mood to go anywhere loud or whatnot. As we arrived at his house, I couldn’t help but to notice the silence surrounding the house as well as the mess in his house.

      “I’m sorry you’ve got to see my mess at home,” he muttered, “You know how it is when a man lives on his own.” He chuckled as he scratched the back of his head.

      “No, its fine,” I smiled.

      “Sit down,” he commanded, “I’ll just cook for you first.” He smiled as he went inside the kitchen.

      I looked around his house and I should say, his house is quiet big for someone who lives alone. I mean, as I’ve heard, his entire family is back in Kyoto and he’s the only one living here in Korea. I guess it’s super sad to be alone in such a big house.

      “Sorry,” he muttered, “I only got some instant ramen in the pantry.” He exclaimed as he put two bowls of instant ramen on the table.

      “Thanks,” I smiled as I sat on the couch.

      “So…” he trailed, “What’s up?” he asked as he sat in front of me.

      I didn’t beat around the bush and quickly got straight to the point, “I-I’m sorry for the past few days,” I started, “I know you’re angry with me.” I muttered as I looked down, embarrassed.

      “I’m not angry,” he smiled, “Just a bit disappointed.” He answered truthfully.

      “I’m sorry if I have been avoiding you guys…” I mumbled as I fiddled with my fingers, not being able to meet his eyes.

      “Well,” he sighed, “That’s the reason why I’m disappointed. I mean, I know you’re avoiding Kai and all but you know, you can avoid him without avoiding us.” He muttered. I finally looked at him in the eyes and he was smiling—a smile that gave me comfort after this tiring day, “You know that I really like you and if it weren’t for the fake relationship between you and Kai, I would have probably courted you.” He chuckled, joking. “But kidding aside, it would’ve been better if you didn’t involve us with what’s happening between you and Kai.” He exclaimed.

      “I’m really sorry,” I apologized, “I promise I won’t do the same thing again.” I told him as I raised my hand like I was swearing.

      He just chuckled with what I did and sighed, “I missed you little dimwit.” He muttered as he went to my side and hugged me tight.

      “I missed you too, as well as Chanyeol.” I told him as I hug him back, “Where is he anyway?” I asked.

      “He cut classes in the middle of the day.” He answered back, “I bet he’s partying like a wild animal right now.” He added laughing, “By the way, don’t avoid us tomorrow anymore, yeah?” he asked and I just nodded, smiling.

      “Yeah,” I answered.

      “By the way, what even happened between you and Kai?” he asked as he started digging on the food that he prepared.

      “I-I think I’m already in love with Kai.” I confessed, not even thinking with what I just said.

      Whenever I’m with Sehun, I don’t know why but it feels like I’m high on truth serum.

      Sehun just smiled at me and nodded, “I know,” he muttered, “I know from the very start.” He added. “I can tell with the way you look at him and how you behave when he’s around and now, I guess I’m right.” He smiles warmly. I guess my feelings for Kai was always evident and he’s the only one who doesn’t seem to notice. “Wait, is this why you’re avoding him? Because you know that he’s still inlove with someone?” he asked, too straightforward for my liking.

      I can’t do anything but to nod my head, “Haah,” I sighed, “But I guess avoiding him won’t do anything good.” I exclaimed, finally feeling relaxed and all, “I’m just missing him more.”

      “And I know you’re missing us too.” Sehun kidded.

      “Yeah, I miss watching you guys bicker all day long.” I chuckled.

      “But you know what,” he mumbled, “You might lose Kai in this state.” He informed me sadly which I didn’t get what he means.

      “What do you mean?” I asked.

      “Gayoung probably told you that Sooyeon has been sticking with us for the past few days and we kind of welcomed her happily. Kai is also welcoming and they even reminisced their good, old days.” He informed me.

      “Well,” I trailed, “Sooyeon have lost him so I guess it’s just fair for her to get her love back.” I sighed as it felt like someone pulled one string of my hope.

      “In that part, I don’t think you’re right.” He smiled.

      What?

      “What do you mean?” I asked him, puzzled.

      “Well, Sooyeon keeps on going back to Kai but we noticed that Kai kind of distances himself from her. Kai is fine with her being a friend but more than that? I don’t think so.” He told me and I don’t know why but I suddenly felt my heart beating faster. I felt kind of happy but seriously, I don’t really understand myself anymore, “Chanyeol was puzzled because he knows how Kai loves Sooyeon so much and he will do everything to bring Sooyeon back to him but I guess…” he paused as he locked his eyes on me, “…some things changed.”

      I don’t know what Sehun is thinking right now but I don’t want to get my hopes up or anything, I’m afraid that it will just get crushed when Sooyeon and Kai will finally get back together.

      “I-I know Kai,” I exclaimed, “He holds on the pain that Sooyeon have left him. Maybe that’s the reason why he’s doing this.” I told him, convincing him—but more like convincing myself.

KIM JONGIN | KAI

      It has been minutes since I saw L Kim hugging Ayaka in the corridors and I couldn’t feel anything but rage. I don’t know why but I suddenly found myself waiting for him in the corridors and when he reached my place, I quickly blocked his way. He looked at me and I can feel the fire in his eyes, burning through my soul.

      “What’s your problem?” he asked.

      “You are,” I answered, gritting my teeth, “You’re the problem.” I exclaimed blatantly.

      “Why?” he smirked, “You saw what we did there?” he chuckled sarcastically, his proud voice ringing against my ear.

      “Ayaka is mine,” I growled, with authority in my voice.

      I’m never possessive but I don’t know what happened to me right now.

      “Yours?” he scoffed, “As much as I remember, she doesn’t belong to anyone.” He stated as a matter of fact.

      He just shook his head, mocking me and was about to leave when I held unto his shoulders, saying the words that I wanted to say from the very start.

      “Leave Ayaka alone,” I warned him.

      L ing Kim just stared at me as a smirk creeped up to his face.

      “Why are you sticking your nose to somebody else’s business?” he asked.

      This guy is seriously turning me to someone that I don’t know. I just hate the perks of him and just thinking about him together with Ayaka is something I can’t tolerate.

      “Because she is my business,” I answered back.

      He laughed like some retard and stared at me, then turning into his serious mode.

      “Tell me Kim Jongin,” he exclaimed, saying my name like it disgusts him, “Do you love my best friend?” he asked, “Because if you don’t, then I’d be happy to protect her from a jerk like—“ I didn’t let him finish what he was about to say and shouted, “Very much!”

      He stared at me, probably surprised by my sudden outburst, “I do love Ayaka,” I exclaimed, my words merely a whisper.

      “Love?” he asked as smirks, “Then what was that with Sooyeon?” he asked as he removed my hands from his shoulders. “Jiyeon is my best friend and I don’t want anybody hurting her.”

      I quickly pushed him to the wall, my hands purposely landing on his collar. I gripped it tightly as I glared at him angrily. How can he say those things in front of my face?! I will never hurt Ayaka!

      “Are you implying that I’m going to hurt her?!” I asked.

      “I’m not saying anything,” he shrugged as he removed my hands from his collar, “With your small gestures, you’re already hurting her. Do you even know that?” he asked. “You love her?” he asked me again, “Really Kai?” he mocked as he pushed me away from  him, “Then don’t be a coward trying hard to hide your feelings for her just because you’re afraid to love again.” He told me as he finally left.

      I was left there, dumbfounded. How can he know what I’m feeling right now? Yeah, he’s right… I do love Ayaka but… I’m just too scared to love again, too afraid to get hurt again. I don’t even know if Ayaka feels the same way as I do. I don’t even know what will happen when I pursue this interest. I don’t want to lose her just because I risked my friendship with her. I don’t think I’ll be able to bear with the pain when it’s Ayaka who’s going to leave me because for me… she’s the air that I need, and if she leaves, I don’t think I’ll be able to survive.

Author's note ♥

Oh my gosh! I am actually so happy to be writing this right now! Like oh my gosh, I have been waiting this for so long already and finally, it came to this point! I hope you guys liked my update as much as I liked it! If you do, please do subscribe and upvote! Also, tell me what you think on the comment section! I read everything so yeah! I love you guys!

Sending purple hearts, Jihyun ♣

Colossians 3:14 - And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.