Athena’s POV

I decided to come to work. No matter what happens to my personal life, I should not neglect my responsibilities. I came to the set of the TV special that I’ll be doing with Kim Soo Hyun.

            “Cut!” The director announces.

            “That’s it...We can all go home now.” He adds.

We bow towards each other.

            “Thank you very much for your hard work!” I tell everyone.

            “I’m really happy to work with you sunbaenim.” Kim Soo Hyun says. “I hope we could do another project together.” He says after.

I smile at him.

            “Same here. You are a passionate fellow so I definitely want to work with you again in the future.” I answer.

            “Ah....I feel so flattered by that sunbaenim.” He says shyly.

            “I said that because that’s what I really see in you. Keep it up.” I smile and give him a tap on his shoulder.

We bid goodbye as we walk our separate ways. I ride the elevator and suddenly, No Min Woo shows up and ride it too. He smiles at me.

            “You just got off from a taping? I was also a guest on another program so I’m here.” He says.

I ignore him and press the button for the underground parking lot instead.

            “What a long day, huh? Do you want to come for a drink? My treat.” He says.

I roll my eyes.

            “What makes you think that I’ll come with a bastard like you?” I finally reply.

But the smile on his face didn’t change a bit.

            “You changed a lot...even your way of speaking comes strong now...but I like it.”

I shot him with sharp looks.

            “I’m hearing some hearsay....they say that your relationship is now on the rocks...some even says that you quietly headed to splitville...”

            “That’s none of your business.”

Why does the elevator seems to move slowly?

            “Just like I told you, he’s no exception than others. Forget about him and let’s start anew.”

            “Excuse me, did you say something?” I answer with the purpose of annoying him.

            “I told you, I’ve changed. I can stand up for you now.” He seriously says looking at me.

            “The one who left is you not me...and like you, I changed too. There’s nothing left of what I once had for you so no matter what happen, I wouldn’t want to be with you again.”

His eyes show that he’s hurt of what I said but before he could talk back, the elevator door opens. My eyes widen upon seeing Jaejoong standing there. For a split second, we meet each other’s eyes. Shivers ran through my spine. Jaejoong glances at No Min Woo before turning back to me.

            “Let’s talk.” He says.

I’m not moving and so he grabs me by the arm and pulls me out of the elevator.

            “What are you doing?!” I pull out my arm. I don’t what him to know that I’m shivering.

            “Let’s talk.” He repeats.

            “There’s nothing left to talk about. It’s over between us.” I avoid his eyes.

            “Do you think I can believe all of that easily?” Jaejoong’s calm yet his eyes are interrogating. “I gave you a few days to have space and clear your mind but it doesn’t mean that it’s over..... Tell me, what’s happening?...”

            “I told you, I got bored...I suddenly want to play around.” I say repeating a lie.

            “You want to play around?....You mean this?” He sarcastically says as he glances at No Min Woo who followed us.

I secretly breathe in and put on a stoic face.

            “Yes. Now that you got the answer you are looking for, I’ll leave now.” I turn my back at him.

            “Do you expect me to believe that too? I know you...this is not who you are.”

Jaejoong, why are you being stubborn? Don’t make it hard for both of us......

            “Dude, she doesn’t want to be with you anymore. Accept it.” No Min Woo cuts in.

            “This is between us so back off because my patience for you is really thin right now.” Jaejoong says in a fierce tone.

I’m sure that he is irritated with No Min Woo’s presence as much as I do. I give No Min Woo a warning look telling him not to meddle.

I turn back at Jaejoong and smile crookedly.

            “Athena, you are better than this.” His eyes are now pleading.

Just give up on me. I don’t want to hurt you anymore....

            “I think you had big hopes for me. This is the real me so open your eyes wide. Before you met me, I’m already like this. I date and breakup once I start feeling bored. Don’t tell me that you honestly thought that I’ll change for you? I admit, I was truly happy during my time with you but you can’t always stay in a beautiful dream...there will be the time that you have to snap out of it and face reality.” I say it in the most ruthless way possible.

            “Thank you for the good memories.....but that dream…… is not for me.” I utter with the last fake strength I have.

My heart hurts so much. We’re totally different. He is loved by many which is totally opposite from me. We’re standing on different sides. I can’t stay where he is and I won’t allow him to be stuck on where I am as well...I’d rather go to hell for losing him than to stay with him and make him feel hell once they strip off everything from him.

            “Am I the only one who feels the same? Does it mean that....you no longer love me?” There is nothing but bitterness and pain in his voice.

I didn’t look at him. I swallow hard and bit my lips. I can’t let my mouth open because definitely, I will cry. I didn’t answer and start making steps. No Min Woo walks beside me. I see Ms. Go next to our van on a distance. She has a confused look on her face. No Min Woo opens his car door and without a choice, I get in.

Jaejoong remains standing there as we drive pass him. I close my eyes and endure the excruciating pain inside my chest.

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Jaejoong’s POV

I pour my glass with some soju and drink it in one shot. I plan to drink my heart out tonight.

            “You had a fight with Athena sshi?” Yoochun asks.

How I wish it’s just a minor fight like he thinks. I didn’t answer but drink instead.

            “Seems like it’s a serious one huh?” T.O.P comments.

            “You just couldn’t stop grinning with happiness the last time we met but you’re the total opposite now.” Hyun Joong says as he pour my glass another shot.

            “She wants to break up with me.” I finally drop them the bomb.

            “W-hat?!” They say in unison.

            “Why? What happened, hyung?” Yoochun asks.

I shook my head.

            “I don’t know….I’m also confused…”

Hyun Joong and T.O.P both sighs while manager hyung stays quiet on his seat.

            “Getting involved with her was the last thing on my mind. I kept telling myself ‘Yah! Don’t meddle…don’t meddle…it won’t lead you to any good. Don’t let yourself get affected….it’s not yours to mind’…But you know, it’s easier said than done……Now the tables have turned and I feel like everything about her is my business…” I voice out.

No matter how hard I think about it, there was nothing wrong so I couldn’t buy her ‘reason’.

The four of them didn’t say a word but continue to observe me instead.

I empty my glass.

            “She’s different from the women I dated in the past…… No matter how many times people degrade her or claim that she’s imperfect or ugly...but for me, she’s simply the most beautiful...that’s why I think, ‘This is my woman’.” I admit with my eyes focus on the glass.

            “Having the strong will to be there for her, to be able to protect her.....I think it suits me...Looking after her is something I’m confident that I can do well. In return, being able to stand next to her, it brings me so much happiness.”

They might make fun of me the next day because of it but I just don’t mind it…I don’t mind at all. All

I want to do is to be honest with how I feel.

            “I think you had big hopes for me. This is the real me so open your eyes wide. Before you met me, I’m already like this. I date and break up once I start feeling bored. Don’t tell me that you honestly thought that I’ll change for you? I admit, I was truly happy during my time with you but you can’t always stay in a beautiful dream...there will be the time that you have to snap out of it and face reality.”

I remember how cold her words were. I’ve seen this side of her before so it’s not totally shocking for me to hear such harsh words from her but….that’s how she tries to shield her pain. She puts up this strong and rude mask when she’s hurting and being vulnerable so I just couldn’t believe it….I can’t believe any words she said.

What happened? I have to know….I have to know….

            “I told her.” Manager hyung says.

We suddenly look at him.

            “She asked me to meet her….She wanted to know and so I told her everything. I told her about your problems at work……I think I also exaggerated….I was just desperate that moment….I’m sorry….I’m sorry, Jaejoong ah…” he says without looking to my eyes.

Suddenly, it came to me. The time she wanted to come with at work me but I refused…..she already knows but wanted to hear it from me and I chose not to say anything. She’s obviously blaming herself for it. How can I not see that?

Once more, I drink another glass of soju. I feel it burning over my throat.

            “So it’s the real reason….She’s righteous that I hate it at times…” Athena is a person who hates wrongdoings but knows how to admit if she’s wrong. She won’t stand back and pretend like nothing happened. “She’s probably thinking that it is her fault. She didn’t do anything yet she wants to take it all on her. Tsk….” I feel frustrated.

I try to fight my emotion but tears filled my eyes.

            “She can just talk and save herself but all she could come up with are those stupid blank stares and foolish lies….Seriously……does it make any sense?”

Then tears streams unpermitted. I chug down another shot and breathe in.

            “Jaejoong hyung….”

            “Jaejoong ah…”

_____________________________________________________________________

Ms. Go’s POV

I arrive to the place Athena texted me. I came to pick her up. I couldn’t comprehend well what I had witnessed in the parking lot earlier but definitely, there’s something wrong.

In the empty riverbank, I found No Min Woo. He shows me where Athena is. Athena is silently sitting there…her expressionless eyes are staring pass the dark river. I approach her immediately.

            “Athena…”

I sit next to her. Silence reign over us for a few minutes before she finally says something.

            “I used to tell myself that I’ve got nothing left but myself. Stop feeling because it will only bring me nothing but grief....but for the second time, I fall in love. I start thinking about a fresh start….I really thought someone as dysfunctional as me can have a second chance….” She says with her sight straight to the water.

She considers herself dysfunctional because the people in her past discarded her.

            “Once again, I start to smile and hope for a future with that person but suddenly reality bites. I can’t be with him because he’ll suffer. Seeing people point fingers at him……it hurts me. Why does he have to suffer from all of that because me?....... I can no longer smile knowing that he’s having a hard time.”

I also heard about Kim Jaejoong’s troubles but I kept quiet.

            “And you’re giving up on him?” I ask.

She shook her head.

            “It’s not giving up…..It is me, protecting him. When I decided to let him in my heart, I promised myself that I will give this love my all. But you know what, I think I now understand why mom chose to it all up and sacrifice for my father. You would rather take the pain because you can’t bear the thought of him hurting. I hated her for that but now I understand her heart….she really is a strong woman.” Athena looks at me smiling but then tears flows out of her eyes. Each drop came out like clear crystals.

            “But why is it so painful? It feels like it’s tearing up my heart….my everything. It’s hard….it’s really……really hard…”

I hug her. Her shivering hands hold onto me tightly.

            “You should have seen his face….You should have seen Jaejoong’s face when I told him I’m leaving him….”

She cries like a baby. She pours her heart out with every sobs. I’ve been with her for almost nine years now but I never seen her like this. My heart is aching for her.

I can’t say anything to comfort her. I just rub her back. The Athena I know is strong and sturdy but she’s vulnerable at this very hour and I couldn’t do anything but cry with her.

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[Author's Note]:

I'm sad too.....But let's just wait for what will come....the next update will be on Friday. Thank you for patience and comments.

Please leave your thoughts about this chap on the comment box...^_^