Jade’s POV

“Unnie, perk up! Why’re you so slouchy?” Krystal asked as we walked out the car.

I couldn’t help myself. Suddenly I was weak, tired, & felt like throwing up bad.

We walked into the restaurant & Krystal & the girls spotted Leeteuk & Eunhyuk from way ahead at the back of the restaurant. I felt my stomach lurch all of a sudden when I saw the rest of them there, sitting at the table.

“I gotta go.” I said in a hurried tone.

“W-Wait, where’re you going?” Luna asked me. The guys turned & looked over to our direction. I glanced at them, then back to Luna.

“You guys go ahead. I’ll catch up later.” I said & turned around to leave the restaurant.

“J-Jade?” Victoria turned around & watched me leave.

I hurried out onto the sidewalk & kept on walking in fast speed so that I’d be out of there in no time. I had my hands inside my pockets to warm ‘em up. As I was finally far enough, I let out a deep sigh & continued walking slower this time.

Thoughts came running through my head. Deeper thoughts. Not about Heechul (& the fact of how ANGRY I am right now.) What’s important & has been swarming around in my head is the fact that I might be leaving.

First off, I know the guys are ok with me staying with them even after my contract’s finished. But after what happened with Heechul…… don’t think I’m gonna.

I hate this feeling. Really. Making decisions is never my kind of thing. I’m always so bad at them.

Now all I have to think is whether to go back, or stay

I didn’t realize how long I’ve been thinking. Next think I knew is that I was at the park already.

I strolled deeper into the park & came to a wooden bench that was filled with snow. I brushed ‘em off & sat down.

Deep breaths I keep telling myself. At that moment I really felt like hitting myself on the head.

How on earth am I supposed to solve this?

I cupped my face & let out light sighs. But then, I felt a little wind brushing against my neck. I slowly turned around to face behind me…

“GAHHH!!” I jumped, almost dropping down to the snowy grounds. Heechul stood behind me with both hands in his pockets. “W-Where the heck did you come from?!” I yelled.

“Hoengseong.” he bluntly replied.

I slapped my forehead. “Did you stalk me or something?” I raised a brow.

“Duh.”

As I was busy trying to get up, he grabbed my arm & pulled me up straight.

“What’re you doing anyway? Siwon’s offering you a big deal there for a free lunch!” he told me.

I couldn’t help but blink & stare at him. He’s so… normal. As if… as if last night didn’t even happen.

“Jade?” he called me. I heard him, but I was too caught up in my thoughts that I don’t even bother anymore.

“Just go ahead…” I told him. “I’ll be there in a sec.”

He eyed me curiously & raised a brow. “Are you ok?”

His voice seemed rather concerned now. I tried my best from letting a sigh escape from me.

“I’m fine.” I said sharply.

He arched back & sighed. “You’ve always been bad at lying.” he told me.

“Yea, I am.” I replied.

“So come on. What is it?” he pryed.

“Nothing.” I said as I sat back down on the bench.

He cleared some snow away & sat down next to me. “Go ahead. You can tell me.” He said.

As I stared back at him, I realized that there was really no need to run away anymore. He seemed… fine. No awkwardness whatsoever. Is this even Heechul?

Finally, I sighed. “It’s just… The whole contract thing, i-it’s-”

“Been bothering you, right?” he finished my sentence for me. I nodded. “It’s up to you.” he said. “Whether you wanna head back to New York, or if you wanna stay… It’s your choice. Not the guys’, not the girls’…” he trailed off a bit. “…Not mine.”

I looked back at him & he was looking straight ahead. Why do I suddenly sense a slight sorrow coming from him? I mean, have I even seen him in sorrow?

“So?” he asked me. I looked away & down to my feet. I still couldn’t figure out the final answer.

“I dunno…” I finally said.  

I felt every mood in the whole place drop. So I decided to change up the conversation. Although by accident, something else slipped away from my mouth.

“Hey, about last night…” I began.

To my surprise when he suddenly slipped right out from his seat & onto the ground. A panic look was written all over his face. He gulped & quickly adjusted himself & stood up, fixing his hair. “What about last night?” he asked me in his most casual tone.

I tilted my head to the side & couldn’t help but eye him curiously. He leaned against the bench & had his eyes looked else where away from me.

“You ok?” I asked him.

“Yea never better.” he said in a rush with a slight ‘convincing’ smile. I nodded slowly. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea to ask him.

I stood from my seat & brushed the excess snow from my lap. “I think I need to head back.” I said as the queasy feeling came once again. “Meet you guys later at the dorm” I said while slinging my bag on my shoulder.

But right before I could leave, “Wait.” he took my wrist & stopped me. I turned my head around. He bit his lower lip & took deep breaths with his eyes closed. I waited, & finally he burst out. “I’m sorry!”

I blinked at his reaction & on he went with his blabbering. He wouldn’t stop apologizing & explaining his excuses about the Mistletoe & how he choked & didn’t know what to do, & how then he felt bad, but at the same time he’s scared that I might kill him, which, I was like ‘Huh?’ Even though I had to admit, I did felt like murdering him at one point. But seeing him like this made me decide to change my heart.

“Y-Yah, Heechul-ah.” I stuttered. He didn’t listen & just kept droning on & on in a fast tone. I started to panic.

How on earth am I gonna make him stop??

I glanced to my right & noticed a few people passing by.

Crud. If they look this way they’re gonna notice him. I thought. Plus with his non-stop blabbering right now who’s ‘not’ gonna notice him?

I quickly took off my pink snowcap & adjusted it on Heechul’s head, which, finally stopped his insane blabbing.

“Be quiet! People are gonna notice you!” I hissed while pulling his head down. “Just forget about last night! Hurry before somebody sees!”

Before he could say anything else, I pushed him deeper into the park near the snowy trees.

He nod his head down & apologized silently. “Sorry.”

I rolled my eyes. “No worries… Just what on earth were you thinking, coming here?? You could’ve at least worn a hat or something!”

He just looked down & pouted.

Oh dear… here comes his ‘Agyeo’ act again.

I ignored his try & just turned around. “Look, I’m heading back to the dorm now. I’ll see you later.”

“Wait, what about lunc-”

Before he could finish, I’d already left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later

I took out my keys to the dorm & opened the door. As I head inside, it was quiet.

Just what I need I thought to myself. Some peace to think

I head over & opened my bedroom door & plopped on the purple sheeted bed. I couldn’t help but brush my hand against my forehead & remember last night’s ‘confusion’. I felt like I wanna burst out & scream if I could.

Just as I closed my eyes to relax, my cellphone vibrated in my pocket. I opened my eyes & took it out. It was a text message from Krystal.

Unnie, what’s Heechul oppa talking about? Are you leaving us? :(

There was a sad smiley pasted just after the message. I clasp my hand over my mouth & suddenly felt as if tears were gonna run down.

One, is because I’m so confused on what’s the right decision.

Two, I’ve never had anyone call me ‘Unnie’ before. I had always been the smallest & youngest amongst everyone. Now that Krystal’s with me, I felt like as if I’ll be leaving my own sister behind…

I stared down at the phone. My hand itched to reply back, but I h