Jade’s POV

I walked over to one of the dance studios & found the guys’. I peeked in, & knew that I was in the right room.

“Hey guys” I walked in.

“Oh hey, Jade!” Sungmin greeted me as he saw me walk in.

“Are you guys done rehearsing already?” I asked them as I saw that most were lying on the floor drinking soda.

“Yep. Just now” Eunhyuk replied. “Want a drink?” he offered.

“Nah it’s ok. I think I’ll wait a bit & pick up some breakfast later” I said.

“Breakfast?” Yesung raised an eyebrow while chuckling. “Isn’t it a little bit late now?”

“Yeeaaa… I kinda woke up at 2 today” I said & rubbed my neck in embarrassment.

“So you haven’t eaten anything yet?” Donghae asked me worriedly.

“Not yet, but I will” I told him. I turned my gaze to the corner. “Heechul” I called him. “What was it that you wanna talk about?”

He packed his backpack & slung it over his shoulder. “Let’s talk over breakfast”

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At The Cafeteria

There was a small café in the building & Heechul brought me there to boost up my energy. I didn’t eat much though, but just grabbed a sandwhich & some hot drink.

“Here” he handed me a piece of paper.

I put my sandwhich down & took it. “What’s this?” I asked, pointing it back at him.

“It’s the address you were looking for” he said cooly as he leaned back on his seat.  

“Address?” both my eyebrows arched at the same time as my face looked a bit blur. I think I need some more hot drinks to boost myself back. Staying up all night yesterday didn’t do me good at all.  

“Weren’t you searching for the place where your brother’s grave is?” he asked. I was completely dumbfounded. At first I blinked.

“Y-You mean” I began to stutter. “You FOUND it?!?” I rose from my seat instantly & leaned in forward to him.

He smugged as he was chewing his sandwhich. I didn’t hesitate to get up & leap onto to him to give him a BIG hug!

“HEECHUL, I LOVE YOU!!!!!” I shouted as I squeezed him into a tight hug; almost making him choke on his sandwhich. “Thank you thank you thank you~!”

“O-Ok now! Y-You can let go” he stuttered. I didn’t listen & just tighten the hug even more. “Uh, Jade? P-People are staring”

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Later

I walked out & closed the car door shut; one hand carrying a bright combination bouquet of roses, carnations, & lavanders.

“Here it is” Heechul breathed in heavily as we finally arrived. There was a huge opened silver gate in front of us. Behind it stood who-knows how many graves.

As we walked over, I continued looking around the place. It was empty & pretty quiet.

“Are you sure we’re at the right place?” I asked Heechul.

“Yep, positive. This is the address I got” he said; both hands warming up in his jacket pockets.

The place seemed peaceful, & even the atmosphere seemed peaceful. I guess it’s a good thing as well that the place is empty. Better chance of me finding Jason’s grave myself without a crowd.

You’ll be ok… the voice in my head kept telling me. As I walked an inch closer to the place, my heart kept on pounding.

What am I afraid of? That something would happen? That maybe this is the wrong place?

Or maybe… I’m just not ready; to face the fact that mom & Jason are finally gone. I have to admit, that all my life living far away in the foster home, I still can’t quite stop myself from having some little hope in me that maybe they’re still alive…

“Jade?” the sound of Heechul’s voice stopped me from thinking far ahead. “Something wrong?” he asked as he stood behind me.

“Nothing… I’m fine” I bit my lip & continued walking further into the cemetery.

The feeling of peace was there. But nothing could stop my pounding heart. Beat by beat… it kept on racing faster. I began to sweat as well even though it was cold. Darn.. I should’ve worn something warmer besides this T-shirt.

My head turned from left to right, busy searching for it. & finally… I almost stepped on something. & when I looked down, there was a certain grave. My eyes grew as I read the plate name.

JASON LEE

1987-1998

I don’t know if it was just me, or I wanted to faint. The sweating stopped, & almost my heart beat as well.

He’s gone… the voice finally told me, & I dropped the bouquet in my hand.

“Hey, Jade!” Heechul’s loud voice called me from across. He hailed me to come over & I did.

He pointed down to the ground. He found it. My mother’s grave…

I didn’t know what to do. After all these years, that little piece of hope in me finally fell down. 

& so did I…

“Jade!!” I fell swiftly into Heechul’s arms as he caught me.

I stood back up lightly as I regained my strength. I don’t think, ever in my life, have I ever felt such pain. It’s kinda like when you get your heart broken by your boyfriend, & you feel some sort of hole being plunged into your chest.

“S-Sorry” I apologized. “I guess I was just surprised” I explained to him.

“Too surprised” he said as he eyed me carefully. “Do you need to rest? We can head home & come back next time” he suggested.

“No…” I said aloud while shaking my head. I kneeled down on the ground, just in front of the grave that wrote Brie Richard.

Both my hands were tight in a fist, shaking. My eyes were holding all the tears back in, but my heart was trembling.

After I paid my respect, I tried to speak, but my throat was too parched in pain. It was dry, & all that came out from my voice was a slight croak. My mouth was hung opened a bit, but nothing would come out.

“Jade, you know, we can just come back tomorrow or something” Heechul told me as he saw how bad my condition was.

“No” I replied sharply, looking down.

“Jade, please-”

My head spun around. “I’m fine, ok??” & the tears accidentally spilled. He didn’t look shocked as his clear, round eyes met my red, watery ones. I clenched my teeth tight, turning my gaze away from his.

I realized how I had just reacted & quickly turned back to him. “H-Heechul, I-I didn’t mean-”

“No worries. It’s ok…” he assured me as he was now down on the ground beside me & to my eye level. My mouth was opened slightly, & I was still feeling the guilt of what I just did. I never meant to blow up like that. Really.

I couldn’t hold back anymore, so I just tilted my head down, closed my eyes, & let the tears sway down to my pale cheeks. He looked down at me, trying to peek at my face that was hidden away slightly by my hair. There was sorrow in his eyes… Something that I’ve never seen before.

Slowly, he leaned in & pulled me over into a one-armed hug as I continued to cry. My body shivered a bit before, but having him beside me now made me feel warmth; both inside, & out.

“I’ve been crying a lot lately” I said. “I really shouldn’t…” I whispered away silently as I rememb