Gill's POV

 

In school....

 

" Hey girls... I saw that person with youngsaengie..it's not very clear though, but I'm quite certain it was a girl..." myo min whispered to her clique. 

 

My heart skipped a beat as I recalled that evil smile she flashed. "It better not be a fangirl...or any girl.." 

 

" Er..did..you .. see..who that girl is?" I stuttered.

 

" She..was wearing brown that day.. Long sleeved.. But I didn't see her face though..so I'm not very sure.." her eyes was filled with jealousy.

 

" Let's not talk about this anymore.. Hmm girls, let me show you something" she took out her phone and browse through the internet.

 

" Guess who this is.." myo min unnie grinned.

 

I stunned. "Ajusshi!!" I screamed in my heart.. What is she doing with ajusshi's picture? 

 

" Your appa??"  Ling asked myo min unnie.

 

" Close to..it's my darling's appa.." myo min snarled proudly, addressing saengie as her darling. 

 

" De???!!!  Youngsaengie's appa?! How did you get this picture? How are you so sure he is the one??" everyone was taken aback.

 

" I got my sources..but I'm certain he is the one.. Shhhh.. Don't say it so loudly..this is suppose to be a secret.. There are a lot of youngsaeng oppa's fans here.. I don't want them to know.." myo min placed her finger on her lips, gesturing for us to lower down our volume.

 

" Omo...ajusshi.. My appa's boss... The person I had lunch with..saengie's appa" I traced back my thoughts. " Oh.. So saengie is the son he was referring to.. Why didn't i thought of that? was that something drastic ajusshi referred to abandoning? Can it be that? How can it be? How can such a nice man abandoned his own son?" A thousand and one questions popped up in my mind as I recalled what ajusshi told me over lunch that day.

 

I struggled inside.. My head was in a turmoil..

 

"This can't be..i have to work something out.."

 

Soon, lessons started...

 

" What should I do? Should I look for ajusshi and clarify? " My thoughts ran wild. I kept spinning my pen at the tip of my fingers and my mind..blank.

 

" Gill...Gill..  Gillian!! Wake up from your dream! This is the 5th time I'm calling you! Stop dreaming about your lover..." the whole class burst out into laughter as the English teacher screamed and teased.

 

" Oh..oh.. Sorry sorry .." someone nudged me and I instantly woke up from that deep thought.

 

" Read from where I stop..." 

 

" Er..o..okay..." I flipped my textbook frantically ,trying to recall the page where she stopped. My eyes swept across the classroom and saw 39 pairs of eyes staring at me.. Cold sweat trickled down my forehead..

 

" Er... There is no..." suddenly, the laughter grew louder. " She already read that long ago..teacher is already on page 170, you are still living in your page 150 world.." one person teased. 

 

" Oh...sorry sorry.." I apologized profusely in embarrassment. Saengie's appa still couldn't get out of my mind..

 

" Hey Gill, let's go out today with myo min unnie and her clique. They are having an outing today and invited us along. Maybe we could get to see Youngsaeng oppa again if we follow them " Ling asked in eagerness..

 

" Er..so sorry Ling, you go enjoy yourself with them, I got more important matters to settle now..bye! Oh ya, remember not to stalk saeng..er youngsaeng oppa, he needs freedom too!" I rushed off to the other direction as soon as I finished my sentence.

 

" I need to clarify this now.." I thought as I ran all the way to the bus-stop. 

 

" What if..what if myo min unnie said was true? What if ajusshi is really saengie's appa? What if ajusshi is looking for his son now? 

What if saengie knows about it? How will he feel? "Those thoughts churned furiously in my brain. The thought of ajusshi abandoning saengie saddens me.

 

Those thoughts accompanied me all the way to ajusshi's company. I ran straight up to the highest level in the company when I got stopped by a security guard. 

 

" What are you doing here, young lady, do you know that there is not suppose to be any outsiders here?" that security guard claimed.

 

" Please.. I need to meet the boss now..i need to meet ajusshi.." I tugged his sleeves as I begged anxiously.

 

" Ah..ah..ara..arasso arasso, you sit here and wait till his meeting is over, I will help you inform him." he replied in frustration. 

 

" Kamsahamnida.. Kamsahamnida!" I thanked profusely.

 

The minutes ticked by and I felt restless. Really restless. Those thoughts didn't fail to haunt me in my mind. My mind was swirling 

like a tornado. I paced myself up and down the hallway till ajusshi's meeting is over.

 

Finally, the meeting room door opened as some of his colleagues and other company's managers strolled out of the door.

 

I lost my patience. Not waiting for that security guard to call on ajusshi, I pushed my way into the room.

 

" Aju..ajusshi... I've got something..something to ask you.." I said breathlessly..

 

" Ah Gill, you seem very anxious.  Are you looking for your appa? He is on the second floor."

 

" No ajusshi! I came all the way to look for you ajusshi!"

 

" Ah de de, come into my office and we can talk from there.." ajusshi led me to his office.

 

Just as i stepped into his office, a name placed on the tabletop caught my eye. Heo Suk Gi.

 

When his office door closed a distance behind me, I mustered all my courage to ask him. Even if it is just a misunderstanding..i need to get things right.

 

" Ajusshi, promise me to answer every question i ask truthfully.."

 

" De, I promise, what is it?"

 

" Ajusshi, let me tell you a story. Once, there was a boy, a young little boy..he led a very happy life till he was ten. At the age of ten, he was thrown out by his parents. No matter how hard he cried and begged, his ruthless parents left him..forever.. and never went back for him. Ajusshi, what do you think of this kind of parents?"  All my emotions started to bottle up inside me.

 

His eyes widened. He blinked a few times, shocked. He fidgeted his fingers and couldn't answer my question. Not waiting for his reply, I continued..

 

" I know of  a singer,a successful singer... Heo Youngsaeng. He is my friend, an extremely important friend to me.. Ajusshi, do you know him?"

 

" Ah..er.. De..no..ani.. Is he from..er..SS501..yes I saw him on TV a couple of..times.. He...is.."

 

" Who is he.. You should know very well.. Ajusshi.." my voice softened as I saw droplets of tears forming at the corner of his eyes.

 

" De..you are right..he is my son..my only son I was talking about." a tear rolled down his cheek.

 

" But..why? Ajusshi? I always thought..i always thought you were a very nice uncle.. But..why? He is your son...wae??!!!" tears too, gushed down from my eyes as i grabbed my bag and ran towards the door.

 

" Gill Gill Gill! Let me explain.. Jebal.." ajusshi caught hold of my hand..

 

I stopped, just in front of the door. I wiped my tears away and stood there.

 

" Youngsaeng..Youngsaeng he is my son, a very precious son to me... His omma and i really..really had no choice at that time.... We..we were both financially unstable..we barely had enough.. to sustain..to sustain... ourselves for even a week... Youngsaeng.. We don't want him.. to suffer with us..so we...purposely hated him and threw him out of the house.. We really had no choice..you have to believe me Gill.." he struggled to explain between tears.

 

My tears felt like a never ending flowing river.. " So ajusshi, how do you think he has been living his life since then? Huh? He is 10..only 10 years old then!! " I stammered.

 

" Ar..arasso.... I have been looking for him... Until now..i have no face to meet him... I see him on TV...he is very happy now.. I don't want to be a burden in his life... His omma too.. But.. He is my son... I will give up anything just to see him now...even if it is giving up my title or losing my money...i want my son back ... Jebal..jebal...help me..." ajusshi desperately begged and forced a piece of paper, with his number written on it in my hands.

 

I fought back my tears. I held the paper tightly in my hands... And walked out of his office.. 

 

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Ling's POV

 

It was quite late at night when I reached home. I hurried into Gill's room.

 

" Gill Gill!! It was such a great outing today! It's a pity you didn't join.. Myo min unnie shared with me a lot about Youngsaeng oppa! He is working on a new album now..well,not exactly new, but they are coming up with a U R man remix version soon! Isn't that cool? he must be very busy..we didn't have a chance to meet him at all..but, I guess I know him better now..you are way far behind..join us next time!" I exclaimed in excitement.

 

" Oh..okay.. Glad you had fun with..with myo min unnie and the rest... Sorry i'm kind of tired today, want to sleep now. Remember to switch off the lights for me when you go out."

 

Gill's back was facing me. Her voice was unusually solemn and soft. I went beside her and saw a tear started trickling down her cheek unknowingly. 

 

" What happened Gill?" I walked up to her.

 

" Nothing.. Hurry go out, I need to sleep.." she buried herself under her blanket to hide the fact that she was crying..

 

I didn't have much of a choice..just hoped that she is alright and left her room.

 

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The next morning...

 

Gill's POV

 

I held on to that piece of paper. Not knowing what to do. I can't possibly call saengie now. He is busy...

 

After much thoughts, I decided to call ajusshi.

 

" Yeobuseyo ajusshi, this is Gill. I..i'm not sure how you can abandon your son at such a young age but..after thinking through the whole night, i think you must be in pain when you did that. I.. will try helping you, give me time. I don't want to disturb him now. Wait till he finishes all his recordings of the new songs and all the events he has to attend, only then..will i tell him." i didn't wait for ajusshi to say anything, and hung up the phone abruptly.

 

On the other side...

 

" Komawoyo Gill...Cheongmal...komawo..." he held on to his phone tightly in his hands.

 

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