I brought down my fist on the wall for the fiftieth time.

“Stupid Daehyun,” I muttered angrily as I winced in pain. My knuckles were already bleeding, and I was pretty sure a bone was misplaced in my hand. I didn’t stop. I wanted to feel physical pain just so I could get over my emotional one.

“Stupid Daehyun, thinking I could handle that. Did he think that I would buy a bouquet of flowers from the nearest flower shop and give it to them as a congratulations gift?! HELL NO!” I shouted, pounding the wall with my fist again.

The pain now was too much for me as I clutched my bleeding left hand in my right one. Tears started forming in my eyes as my heart ached again. Daehyun, why did you kiss her back? In the week I have known you, you were not like that.

You were cold, arrogant and heartless. Even though we fight, I still appreciate the things you do, even if it’s just noticing me.

I looked around the place I was in. I somehow landed in an alleyway, only one street lamp to provide light. I sighed and started walking aimlessly around, not caring where my feet took me.

I stopped walking when I arrived at the park. It was eerily silent, the place still. It was already eleven o’clock at night, so what do you expect?

I sat down in one of the swings, slowly swinging myself. With no distractions, my thoughts went automatically to Daehyun. Images flashed through my mind, like the sleeping face of Daehyun, his smile, his girl group dance, etc.

I unclenched my right hand from my wrist and brought it softly to my chest. I closed my eyes as I softly sang the lyrics I wrote in my notebook.

No matter how much pain you cause me

I find myself running to you

Your smile keeps me from isolating,

The feelings I have for you

You’re cold, arrogant and heartless,

But I still keep on hoping,

That no matter what the world brings us

You’ll still be there,

“And even though you’ve had enough of me,” I heard Daehyun’s voice sing. I continued singing though. It was just my mind playing tricks on me.

“I’ll still be there to cheer you on,” I sang the next line, waiting for the imaginary Daehyun to keep on singing.

“I’m still loving you, with all my heart,” Imaginary Daehyun sang once again, though the voice was stronger this time, more… real.

“And I know these feelings will never be gone,” I delivered the last line of the song lyrics. I whipped around to see a real life Daehyun standing behind me, looking cautious and concerned.

I fought to keep the tears back as I stood up from the swing abruptly. I planned on running away, maybe kicking him in the shin first when Daehyun himself stopped me.

“Namjoo, wait. Where did you go?! We have been searching everywhere for you! Yongguk hyung is going out of his mind with worry, Jongup refuses to smile until he sees you, and Sarang-!“

“Don’t you ever mention that name to me ever again!” I interfered, staring at him with uttermost hatred. No, my anger isn’t misdirected to Sarang. Yes, I was mad at her. However, Daehyun is in hot waters with me right now.

“Why not? She was worried sick when she couldn’t find you! That’s why she offered to stay home after a ten minute search. She couldn’t bare the pain that’s why she isolated herself,” Daehyun explain, looking at me confusedly.

I almost wanted to laugh at him. Here was Jung Daehyun, eating up all the lies his girlfriend told him. I didn’t point it out though, knowing it was useless.

“Daehyun, if I and your girlfriend decide to commit suicide, who would you stop first?” I asked him seriously, looking into his eyes. His eyes flitted between me and the air beside me.

“Don’t make me choose-“

“Sooner or later, you’ll have to choose Daehyun. That time is now. Choose Daehyun, for I will know which path to take if thy choice… hurts me,” I stated sadly, smiling. That smile was not full of warmth and fun. That smile told him that this girl here is already used to being screwed over.

“You really want me to choose?” Daehyun asked quietly, his eyes telling me it was a challenge he was already willing to take. In truth, I didn’t want to know. It was better to not know than to live with the painful truth.

“I choose Lee Sarang”

That one sentence had enough power to bring down the last brick of the wall that separated my heart from my feelings. That once sentence told me clearly to give up, that he already has someone. That one sentence was powerful enough to break me.

“How did you know those lyrics?” I asked him, my voice steadier than I imagined. He waited awhile before answering.

“Sarang showed me the lyrics. It’s surprising you know them,” Daehyun answered cautiously. I shook my head, my eyes focusing on the ground.

Those lyrics? They were really mine. I have a talent of writing lyrics and finding a tune to them. How did Sarang get a hold of it?

Never mind. He thinks those lyrics belong to her anyways, so it doesn’t matter to him.

I turned my back and headed to the dorm, not glancing back. I could feel Daehyun’s burning gaze, but I felt nothing anymore. It seems like my heart shut off all my feelings and emotions after Daehyun chose her. I should’ve been expecting it anyway.

I found the spare key under the mat and unlocked the door. I opened it up, noticing no one was in the house. I guess Sarang went home.

I walked robotic like to my room, opening it with my right hand. I glanced around the room. Nothing has changed except for the person that was already in it. I could feel the tears already threatening to spill. I let it.

I collapsed on the bed, not caring if my left hand was already filled with pain. I didn’t want to feel anymore. I wanted to get rid of emotions. Only one word summed me up now.

Numb. 

A/N: You guys creatively expressed your hatred for Sarang, ehem, Kitchin and shawtyshawty, so I'm pretty sure you'll not hesitate to kill now, LOL XD. I hope you guys liked this chapter! Thank you again to those who commente, supported and read my story! I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU! :D

-runs to a new corner and hides from everyone- 

PS: Those lyrics that I posted up? It was not copied off a song. I wrote them myself. Yes, I know I fail at stuff like that XD