My Senior Year : Apologies

It was the most unexpected thing. I almost fell off my bed when my handphone started ringing and flashed Kyuhyun's name. Hesitating should be the least of my worries at the moment, but thinking about our last encounter, I'm really not sure how I'll be able to respond to Kyuhyun at the moment.

The ringing stopped and I realized I accidentally pushed the button to answer Kyuhyun's call. After a few seconds of regretting and blaming my stupid finger for acting on its own, I placed the handphone next to my ear to listen to the other line.

"Hello? Sungmin?" I sighed hearing Kyuhyun's voice, I thought I was never gonna hear him say my name again.

"Look..." He continued when I didn't speak "I know you're there, and you probably don't want to talk to me right now... But..." He paused for a few moments, I heard him sigh as well "but I wish you could just listen to me for a while... Please don't hang up..."

I wouldn't, but at the same time, I couldn't bring myself to speak up and tell him I'm gonna listen. Instead, I laid properly on my bed, hugging MinBunny with one arm and closed my eyes, concentrating on Kyuhyun's voice.

"Sungmin... I..." another pause "I'm..." and another one "I'm sorry..." I heard him let out some air "I'm sorry Sungmin"

I bit my lip. I couldn't describe the heavy feeling that was suddenly lifted off from me upon hearing Kyuhyun apologize. I never thought I'd hear such words from him. I didn't expect it. Of course talking to him again was enough but this... I squeezed MinBunny tight.

"I'm sorry if I was being rude the other day. I was just... I--" He clicked his tongue in frustration "I don't know what happened to me when I did that..."

I sighed as well. Kyuhyun's voice was so warm and rich, I couldn't help but smile in relief.

"I know I hurt you... I did feel bad right after, coz I know I promised you that I'll protect and help you... But look at what I did..."

I felt Kyuhyun's sincerity in his tone. He didn't sound like he was pleading but he sounded so sincere.

It made me want to run to him and hug him, but given the situation, of course I can't do that... For now...

"It's okay if you don't want to talk to me just yet, but please try to forgive me. I'll.. I'll do whatever you want, if it means we can get our friendship back. Sungmin..."

There was a long pause before he spoke again. "Sungmin... Say something... Anything..."

I opened my mouth only to close it again. What am I going to say? Of course, it's easy to just forgive him. But I think there's much we need to talk about to really straightened things out between us.

"Sungmin... Are you even listening?"

"I'm here..." I couldn't hold it in any longer. I wanted to let Kyuhyun know that I heard him, that I was listening to everything.

"Is this a bad time? Did I wake you?"

I shook my head even though he couldn't see it. "No... No, it's fine. I was just..." I was what? "I..."

"Hey, you don't have to say anything now if you don't want to"

"Sorry... I really don't know what to say right now" I figured it was the honest thing to say.

"I..." I heard a shaky breath escape Kyuhyun "I want to see you"

I don't know what went on in my stomach but when I heard what Kyuhyun said, there was this weird feeling and I felt like my lungs stopped working. Knowing how Kyuhyun felt for me gave a different meaning to everything else...

I didn't realize that I was not able to say anything until Kyuhyun spoke again "D-do you want t-to see me as well?" He sounded like he didn't want to ask me about it. He clearly was hesitating.

I smiled. I felt satisfied with what he said but I really don't know how I should answer his question. Of course, I want to see him. I miss him. But I can't just say that, right?

"Maybe..." Finally, I answered.

"Have you forgiven me yet?"

"Hmm... No. Not yet."

"Are you thinking about forgiving me soon?"

"Uh... I'm... I'm not sure... Should I?" I fought back a smile.

"That's always up to you. I can't force you if you don't want to. Though I want you to..."

"You want me to huh? Did you say that you'll do whatever I want?"

"Huh?" I can just imagine Kyuhyun's face. He must be regretting this now "Well... Yeah... Why? Is there anything you want me to do?"

The smile I've been holding in has crept out of my face. Well, well... Opportunities like this don't come so often, right?

"I'll think about it Kyuhyun. Right now I need to sleep, I guess you too."

"Right... So, I'l