"Avery? Hey, you with us?" 

I blink and blink again, vision fuzzy and shapes only vaguely recognizable as my eyes adjust to the light of the room.

"Jaebum?" I manage to groan, head fuzzy and tongue feeling like lead in my dry cottonwool-filled mouth.

"Hey, kiddo. Nice to see you awake again." He says, coming in to focus as my eyes finally adjust, dressed in sweat pants and a loose top he sits at my bedside, the mug he'd claimed as his steaming on the bedside table with what is probably coffee. 

"What, what happened?"

He squeezes my hand a little tighter at the question. "You broke your ankle, during the semi-finals. They gave you morphine that knocked you out and we managed to convince the medics to let us take you home so your healer could heal you instead of being put in the med-bay and being forced to sit out the rest of the tournament."

I try and sit up, limbs stiff and not obeying the commands my brain gives when I want them to. A hand slides to my back as another slips under my knees, shifting my body into a sitting position just as the door opens.

"Avery, you're up." Lay, his voice gentle yet so fear-inducing I feel my heart contracts and drops to my stomach.

"Hey Lay," I manage to choke out, earning a confused side-eye from Jaebum as he hears the struggle in my voice.

Lay turns to him, a small almost relieved smile gracing his gentle features as he asks who is undoubtedly my new best friend to go downstairs so he could finish his healing and discuss some medical things about my injury with me.

Unaware that he was leaving me with my soon-to-be murderer, Jaebum agrees and bounces downstairs to tell the others I am awake and everything is well.

The door shuts and my heart drops even further.

Lay says nothing as he adjusts his gloves and ignites the green energy of his ability, a cold shock running through my veins as he places his hands on the skin of my shin before it turns to a soothing warmth, the familiar feeling of his healing running through my bloodstream.

Yet still, he says nothing.

"Lay," I whisper, the slow drugged feeling easing as his hands continue to glow. "Please Lay, I'm sorry."

His jaw clenches, teeth grinding as his eyes turn to steel. "You promised. You promised me, Avery."

"I know and I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry but there was nothing I could do to stop this from happening."

"I don't care. You promised me you would look after yourself. That you'd forfeit if you weren't in good fighting condition but no, you're too stubborn and you kept fighting even after breaking two ribs and cracking your jaw. Jaebum said you wouldn't forfeit even after very clearly breaking your ankle and it was only luck that your opponent was honorable enough to not beat you unconscious and instead walked you out of the ring to end the match." 

I stay silent unable to say anything as he continues, not looking up from where his hands now press into my legs, fingers curling and grip tightening with each frustrated word that passes from his lips.

"You promised me you would never scare me like that again. You promised us all that you wouldn't do it. Avery, we felt your pain and we felt you get knocked out. All that pain, excruciating searing pain and it all just suddenly stopped. We thought you were dead. It was only once Luhan realized he could still feel your mind that we figured out you weren't."

He swallows hard, letting go of my leg and slowly beginning to pull his gloves back on. "You terrified us, Avery. We thought we lost you. One of the only people we can trust, who let us be human and let us learn to be ourselves again and we thought we lost you forever."

I let out a pathetic whisper, my apologies unfit to make up for the pain I caused him, caused them. "I-, I'm sorry." 

"I've lost too many people I love to lose another so please, please do everything you can to avoid doing it again. I won't make you promise because I'll just be disappointed again but please don't let me lose you, I love you, we love you too much to survive losing you."

The admission stuns me but as it sinks in and I fully register the words he has spoken I realize the feeling goes both ways. 

I love them. 

I love them all and I wouldn't be able to survive losing them.

They're my family and I can't lose another.

"I love you too, you and all your brothers. You're my family and I promise I won't scare you like that again if I can help it and I promise you won't lose me. Ever."

Lay smiles gently, a small sad smile and I know he doesn't believe me. I'm too reckless to keep such promises but his look of sadness is not one I'll forget so I'll try my hardest to honor the promises I've made to him just as much as I've honored my vow to bring the brothers together again.

"So what happened with the rest of the tournament? Who won?"

Amber chuckles and holds a hand out to Eric who groans and slaps a small stack of notes in her hand.

"Told you she'd ask who won the tournament first."

"Damnit, Amber."