Sungmin’s POV~

The car ride home was silent. She was driving since I didn’t want to endanger her life anymore than I already had. How could I do this? So stupid! The ELFs are gonna kill her, the press is gonna tear her apart, and worse yet, Siwon and Leeteuk are gonna tear me apart. Damn. A thousand times damn! After she parked the car in the garage, we both climbed out and quickly went inside. She dashed into her room and shut the door firmly. I looked at my watch. 11:00 already? Damn. I really hope that things don’t get too scandalous.

Uki’s POV~

I was near hyperventilation at this point as I tore off my clothes and slipped into a pair of Sophies and my UCLA T-shirt. I mean, Sungmin and I…Yah! What would have happened if that photographer hadn’t snapped that photo when he had? Would we have kissed? Would we have kissed more than once? Would I have liked it? No! A thousand times no! This is just unacceptable! I can’t fall for another guy! As if my life wasn’t complicated enough. I’m just now mending things with Donghae and then Sungmin comes along acting too cute for his own good? NOT ACCEPTABLE.

And that photo! I can already imagine the story that that’s gonna generate! Oh man, oh man, I’m just causing TROUBLE for Super Junior at this point. What do I do? Leave? Apologize? Cry? Yah! I know. I’ll call Michelle. Wait, wteff? Hell no! That betrayed me! Troy? Wait, what?! Did you forget that he double crossed you already?! Ugh! Why is it that everyone in my life are such backstabbing bastards?!

I flopped on the bed, covered my face with my pillow, and let out a frustrated scream, screaming as loud as I could to be rid of all this pent up angst. After I was done, I returned the pillow to its natural place and sighed. This is ridiculous. When did my life become such a mess? I crossed my arms behind my head, staring at the ceiling. I know. All I have to do is just chill out and think about everything. I’ve been in a whirlwind for so long thanks to Super Junior that I haven’t had a chance to just sit and relax and unwind and really just think about things. I let out a slow breath. Okay. Thinking.

1] Lee Donghae

I didn’t know what to do about Donghae. I mean, what was I supposed to do? Did I like the guy? Totally. Did I forgive him for what he’d done to me? Not completely. Did I want him in my life? Yes<3 Ugh. Life is just so hard sometimes. But I know that I wouldn’t be able to live without this guy. I mean, c’mon. We’ve been friends since the very first day I met him, which was, what? Six years ago? Seven? I can’t throw all that away. But what was I supposed to do? He’s always so busy, and he has his younger sister to tend to, and I have my studies, and I’ll be leaving soon. Dang. It just dawned on me that I’m gonna be leaving soon.

O__O

I’d been living here for what seems so long that anywhere else but here seems like such a foreign concept to me now.

-Sigh-

Donghae. What am I going to do with you?

2] Leaving

Now that it has come to my attention, did I really wanna leave anymore? I mean, ever since I moved to the US, I always promised myself that I was never going to move back to Seoul. I really disliked it here with a passion. I mean, fun to visit, but I’ve gone through way too many bad experiences here to ever want to live here again. But, like, I’ve had so much fun with the boys that I don’t want to be so far away from them. Ugh. Maybe I’ll stay in Korea and just move outta Seoul. Maybe move to Mokpo. I mean, Donghae rose up out of that city, so it’s obviously not a total fail. Besides. A quiet city. That’s all I really need, right? That’s all I want.

But then what about Mommy and Daddy? They love it over in the US and they’ve become quite accustomed to US life. I can’t just tell them I’m moving to Mokpo by myself. Wteff are they gonna say?

Oh eff.

What about COLLEGE?

­-Yeah, Uki, college. Ya’ know, that thing you’ve been working for half your life to get to? You can’t just forget about that.-

Oh great, it’s you again. I don’t wanna talk to you. The last time I did, Donghae and I ended up on a date.

-I haven’t heard a thank you yet~-

…Thank you.

I sighed. Arguing with myself again. Not lookin’ good, Uki, not lookin’ good. What do I do? I mean, Harvard is waiting for me. And Cambridge. I mean Cambridge. That was my dream college. I can’t just not go after I’m so close to being admitted. Then where would I be? Sobbing twenty years from now, “Why?! Why didn’t I just go to college?!”

Ugh.

At least I know where I’m standing now.

Seoul.

Mokpo.

Cali.

…England.

3] LIFE

Oh what to do. In just the past two months, my visit to my brother somehow morphed from the happy-go-lucky family visit I had intended it to be, to a drama-filled warzone. Even though the drama was, like, a thousand miles away! Wteff, man! Life has just been so screwy lately, and I hate it. I was all happy when I first got here, then next thing you, my boyfriend cheats on my with my so-called best friend, who SWORE to me forever ago that she didn’t like him, my current on-the-verge boyfriend and I are already having issues without even going out yet, my brother is being over-protective, I have people asking me if I like a guy ten years older than I am, my mother and father are being gross and having a “romantic getaway” to Europe, and my birthday is almost coming up. I DON’T WANT TO GET OLD YET!

Yah. Midlife crises and I’m not even twenty yet. -__-

When did life get so complicated?! T^T

-Sigh-

I don’t know what to do about you yet, but I suppose I’ll figure you out along the way like I always do.

Ahh. I feel so much better now. It’s moments like these that I live for~

Oh, one more thought I suppose.

4] Lee Sungmin

…

4] Lee Sungmin