Hello. As you might've known before, I already closed my account under kumakuma166. I transferred PoU to my friend and she is the one who manage the story. I simply mail the story to her and she will put the story to the chapter :)

I wrote this story (and my other stories) to ease my own thirst about todae. That was my first intention. But then, it became a habit for me, to make canon drabbles about todae. Yeah, this is a make believe stories about them, based on everything that has Daesung, Tabi, or Todae.

I was mentioning 'suicidal want' at I Am Sorry chapter and apparently there were people messaging me (and to this acct too. idk whether it was the same person or not -nana's friend here) saying that why did I write Tabi to be a suicidal and cursing me like it happened because of, me? Hell, I had NO intention to have it like that. This simply because I WROTE, once again, I WROTE it based on research about SK people tend to think to give up their life. Hell, Daesung had it too. I wrote the chapter even before Tabi wrote his apology. Do you think I went to SK, whispering mantra to Tabi to apologize and brought the idea of suicide? (heh, that's not a suicide attempt anw x_x)

Please, this is my imagination. Sometimes, I was surprised that some story even led to a real story.

My hear is in pain, too. But do not pent up your anger at me?

I wrote this supa-long author note because, I am sad because of a particular person.

Thank you for reading. Hope Tabi gets well soon.

Nana.

“Disgusting. What did he do actually? ing a trainee when he was high?”

“Now we have best sub-unit in South Korea, G-Druggie and T.Oh.!”

“Wow. A complete group consist of two junkies, one murderer, one addict and one racist.”

“He can go to hell.”

Seunghyun’s breath became erratic. The voices behind his head were too loud. Trembling, he took a bottle of medicine, his routine one, even though he had drunk it not too long ago. He needed to shoo away the shouting voices. He had to drink it. He had to sleep the voices away.

Please. I can explain myself, Seunghyun defended himself.

“Tsk. Don’t be silly.”

“Yeah. It’s the fact you can’t denied, Choi Seunghyun.”

“Don’t raise your head at us. You should know your place!”

Seunghyun closed his ears and bit his lower lips. He fell onto the floor while hugging his leg.

Please.

He pulled his own hair hardly after knowing it didn’t help him with the evil voices. Then he was thankful the voices almost went away as he pulled it even harder. It hurt, but it helped.

Slowly but sure, he opened his eyes.

But it was blur.

He blinked.

But it’s still blur.

He blinked again.

It’s black.

***

He opened his eyes. It was the river he and his mom were frequently at when he was a little. The birds singing, the sound of water crushing with the stones, the wind caressing his face… He looked at his surrounding that was too calm. His eyes searched for someone and that someone was walking to him. He smiled when he realized who the person was.

“Eomma,” he whispered.

“Yes, my child?” The older woman hugged him and Seunghyun just wanted to come back where his problem vanished as he buried his face into his mother’s shoulder.

“I’m tired.”

That was true. He was tired to hear all the voices. He wanted to sleep. Just long enough to wake up with a peaceful day.

“Oh my sweet child,” his mother cooed. “You’re saying that just now?”

“Now I’m really tired.”

“Then sleep?”

“I can’t sleep,” Seunghyun inhaled her sweet scent. “That’s why I have to take sleeping pills. But it doesn’t work anymore. I want you to cuddle me to sleep.”

“You’re a big boy, now, Choi Seunghyun. Eomma can’t cuddle you to sleep anymore.”

“Then who will?” Seunghyun looked up at his mother.

Just to find it all went black