Discovering One’s True Feelings

The Way We Used To Be

As the week slowly comes to an end, it was getting closer for the time for Taecyeon’s father to return.  That night Guigui laid in bed worried, thinking about how she was going to break the news to him.  She felt apologetic towards him but yet, she knew she could no longer stay by Taec’s side.   How could she when he sees her as some evil villain who is trying to break up his relationship with his precious Yoona.  She pondered and pondered about how disappointing it will be for her beloved uncle.

At the same time, Taec not knowing that his father will be returning the next day; lay in his bed wondering about what Guigui was doing.   All week long, all he thought about was her; how she was doing, what she was doing, who was she doing those things with, did she have her meals, was he too harsh on her, should he call and apologize, is she going to come back home, and when will she come back home?  Those were questions that kept running through his mind.  He became annoyed with his own thoughts and so he got up and drove to Nichkun’s house.  When he arrived, he noticed that everybody was over there.

“Oh Taec, we was just about to call you man,” Nichkun said as he opened up the door for him.

“What are all of you guys doing?” Taec asked back.

“Nothing much, everybody was bored and since it’s a Friday night; they all decided to gather here to hang out.” Nichkun replied.

“Wah Taec, you’re here.  I figure you wouldn’t want to come since you and Yoona are spending so much quality time together,” Wooyoung answerd.  “So tell us, how is the life without a wife around anymore huh?  I bet you’re enjoying every second you have with Yoona huh, am I right!”

“Yeah I bet he is.  I bet he is so overjoyed that he purposely came here to gloat.” Jay responded back jokingly with a smirk on his face.

“YA!  Don’t joke about that, do I seem like I hated my wife to you guys?” Taec shouted back.

“Well, I wouldn’t say you hate your wife, but I wouldn’t say you love her either,” Chansung answered.  “It’s like you don’t care whether she is there or not.  She isn’t important to you, well at least not as important as Yoona is.”

“Well of course, Yoona is my girlfriend and I love her.  Guigui on the other hand,” Taec pauses as he tries to think what she means to him.  “Guigui is, well she is just my pretend wife.”

“Pretend wife?” Junho asked.  “Dude, a wife is still a wife.  Even though you may not want to be with her, you should at least try to enjoy the times you guys have left together.”

“Hey Taec, I am curious about something.  What was the reason as to why you guys fought anyways?  I asked Guigui, but she wouldn’t tell me.” Nichkun asked.

“You met with Guigui?  When, how was she doing?  Is she still upset at me?” Taec quickly asked.

“What is with all that questions all of sudden huh Taec?” Jay answered.  “I thought you said that she was only your pretend wife?  Why are you so anxious after hearing hear name?”

“Actually Taec, we didn’t talk about you at all.” Nichkun replied.

“What?  So what did you guys talked about and why did you meet her?” Taec asked a little disappointed and aggravated.

“Well we just kinda bumped into each other on the streets and so I invited her to have brunch with me.  I asked her about what happened between you two but you know her, she wouldn’t tell me anything.  Instead, she just smiled and told me that it wasn’t important, for me not to worry about it.” Nichkun replied.

“Was she by herself,” Taec pauses.  “Or…..was she with somebody else?”

“Naw man, she was there by herself.  Who else will she be there with?”

“Freaking Aaron.  He is always with her; like he is glue to her or something.” Taec thought to himself.

“But when we was done, her friend did come pick her up.” Nichkun added afterwards.

“WHO!?” Taec asked with his eyes wide open.

“Dude seriously, why is you so curious about your wife’s personal life?” Jay, Wooyoung, Junho, and Chansung asked.

“Shut up!” Taec replied to them.  He turns back to Nichkun, “Who came to pick her up?”

“What do you mean who?  Who else, Aaron; she is living with him!” Nichkun answered back.

Taec immediately stood up, “WHAT!  SHE IS LIVING WITH HIM!!!!!” Taec responded with a surprising and infuriated voice.  “How can she just moved in and live with him.  What is she thinking?  We are still a married couple.  How can she just do that?  And here I was, feeling guilty about how things went down for the past week, worrying about her; and yet, she has been living happily with her new boyfriend.”

“Why were you feeling guilty and miserable for the past week?  I thought that you said you didn’t care about her huh?” Jay asked curiously.

“Yeah, and what does it matter to you so much about who she is living with huh.  What difference does it make if she is living with another guy; you are practically living with Yoona anyways from what I hear about her always being over.” Junho asked.

“Shut up!  I didn’t do anything wrong, she is the one in the wrong here!” Taec shouted, trying to defend himself from his friends prying.

“Taec, could it be that maybe you have feelings for Guigui?” Wooyoung asked.

“Yeah is that it?  I mean, when I think about it that way, it all makes sense; all those times when you would get jealous whenever a guy approaches her and also why you are so upset about her staying with another guy.” Jay asked.

“Uh-huh, don’t forget about how eager and anxious he was earlier when Nichkun mention her name,” Chansung responded.

“No, I don’t have feelings for her.” Taec screamed at his friends and then pauses.  “Or do I?  That would explain why I am always so annoyed of Aaron being around Guigui, but……..”

“Oh my gosh Taec, you like her don’t you!” Jay shouted excitedly.

“I don’t know,” Taec snapped back.  “I mean sure there are times when I do feel something for her, but yet, I know that I am in love with Yoona.  I mean, how can I not be in love Yoona when she was the person who I had waited so long for?”

“Just because you waited for her don’t mean that you can’t fall in love with someone else.” Junho replied.

“Well how am I supposed to know if I like her or not?” Taec asked confusedly.

“Let me ask you something Taec,” Nichkun responded.

“What is it?” Taec asked.

“First close your eyes.” Nichkun replied.

Taec, unsure of what Nichkun is going to asked, do as he is told.  He closes his eyes, “Ok, now what?”

 “Ok, now think about Guigui, imagine that she is here with you, tell me how do you feel?  What is the first thing you think about when you see her face? ”

“Hmmm……When I see Guigui huh….well when I see her, I immediately notices her smile and think to myself that something bright has entered into the room. I feel….happy and excited…and relaxed……and comfortable I guess…..Seeing her smile is like the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.   And when I saw her crying, I felt an aching pain in my chest.  For me……Guigui is kinda like my coffee you can say.  Whenever she is around me, I feel energized and alive…….”Taec began expressing his feelings toward Guigui with a smile on his face.  “Being with her is like……it’s like taking in a breath of fresh air, something that I have never experience before.  Being around her, I am always smiling and happy because she is always so cheerful.  And when we have a conversation, it’s like…..I don’t know but it’s ……. it’s something I can’t really do with Yoona you know, where I can openly express my thoughts to her and she would understand.  We can sit somewhere and talk forever about everything and anything that comes to our mind.  And whenever I am upset, she is the person who always tries to cheer me up by doing little stupid things.  To me, she is………….”

Jay interrupts Taec before he could finish, “Hate to tell you this bro, but it sounds like you not only like her but you’re in love with her!”

“Yeah man, just watching you describe how she makes you feel, we can all tell that you are in love with her already.  You have a completely different look on your face whenever you talk about Guigui, you know that?” Nihckun answered.

Taec sits there staring at his friends with a blank look on his face.  “What, I am in love with Guigui?  How can that be, I know that sometimes I do feel something but, it’s not the same as how I feel towards Yoona.” Taec said aloud as he thinks to himself, trying to make sense of what his friends are telling him.

“Look Taec, we can all sit here and tell you what we think; but until you realizes it yourself and admit to it, this is all pointless.” Jay answered back.

“Argh I don’t know!  This is way too complicated for me.  I am going home!” Taec replied as he gets up and heads out to his car.  He drove off and returned home where he laid there thinking about what his friends had said to him.  “This doesn’t make sense.  How can I be in love with her when I am in love with Yoona?  Am I really in love with her?  I mean sure I will admit that I do feel something towards her whenever I see her, but for me to be in love with her?” Taec thought to himself as he fell asleep.

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leeluv #1
Chapter 67: Authornimmm,i've been reading all over again,please update soon =)
leeluv #2
Chapter 67: Author-nim , update soon please . in love wth this story! Fightting! =)
Priincessg1 #3
Chapter 66: I really like Nichkhun for Guigui he really looks after her :) Keep it up! I really like this story!
suri65 #4
Chapter 67: Tq dear author for update the story. Welcome back. After so long of waiting finally you update the story . Tq again. Wow what an amazing story. I also like nickhun and l don't mind if guigui choose khun at the end of your story. He will treat guigui well. Your story never fail in touching my heart. I like it so much. Please don't stop writting and please continue your story until the end. Your story is so good and play with our emotion and l cry so much when l read it.Tq again forwritting such an amazing story.
HappyThings #5
Chapter 67: Authorniiim~~~~~ your story really really really touch my heart... You will continue this story didnt you?
suri65 #6
Chapter 63: dear author. please update the story. you cant stop now. you are a very good writer . i love reading your story. l want to know what happen next. who will guigui choose taec or nickhun. please update soon. your story really touch my heart
aimeharumaa17 #7
Chapter 63: love this story... I want more taecgui skinship, hug n kiss... I'm so so curious what will happen next, update please...
v3n4m5 #8
Chapter 63: Really love the story! Still waiting.. Pls Update soon Authornim. Fighting!!!
mistxz
#9
Chapter 63: I love to see what's going to happen between Taec and Nickhun next. May the best man win. And I hope it will be Taec..hihi.

Author-nim..fighthing!
mikoshine
#10
Chapter 63: thanks so much for updating! :D
that's an exciting twist in the story, Nichkhun being Taec's competition... I think that'll help Taec in finally doing something and decide what he really wants... and the two of them watching movies, just like old times... so sweet!
waiting for the next updates XD