TiredOfProblems: Hi!! Um so let's get to to point. My cousin N is mad at me and my other cousin S for video chatting for the first time. She found out when cousin S post up pics of us chatting on Facebook. She wrote on my wall and said "I see you..." so I asked her what was wrong and she told me not to talk to her anymore. I told cousin S about it and she said it happened to her too. I said it was so childish that she got mad just fir that. I mean me and her chat for like a billion of times!!! Me and cousin S chat once. When I saw her at school the next day, I said hi but she look away. So I guess she doesn't want to make it up. I told cousin S to not talk to her anymore since she doesn't want to talk to us. but everything became fine after a while...
Like a week ago cousin S came and slept over my house for the first time. Cousin S puts down on Facebook 'dancing with my cousin (my name here).' cousin N saw it and was comment 'so no invites? I see you guy's!' then cousin S comment that she can't come cause my mom wont let her. My sister did too. I guess she got mad and asked my sister why was she dipping in. My sister said she wasn't. She was just telling her why she couldn't come. Cousin N start saying some other things so my sister call her a 'ty wannabe.' my sister was just mad at her because she's acting like she can control everybody and she was sick if that. So we started talking on messager and cousin S, my sister, and I start saying that she keep on making the problem bigger by not letting us explain and her not talking to us. Cousin N got mad and told her mom about the problem. She pretend to be her mom and wrote to me something about solving the problem. I know it was her being her mom because her mom wouldn't cuss and her mom knows better grammar.
But how can we make up with her when she said she was tired of all of these problems?!? She said she was done so I guess we're done too but noooo... she brought her mom in after a few days of fighting. I just want to know how to deal with this because I know she needs us and still want us to talk to her. She's gonna turn to me, cousin S, and my sister in the future.
Well... like. Who's fought is it? What should I do?
Sorry for all of this! There's more but this is just the summary. Hope you can help me!!
-Thanks
~Tired of problems

Friend: Dear TiredOfProblems,

First off, it’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong and it isn’t your duty to choose any sides. A stubborn person can go a long way, but they all have limits just like cousin N does(: Repairing this friendship shouldn’t be too hard.

The way I see your situation, cousin N’s pride is getting in the way of solving this problem. Try to find out what happened between cousin N and S. Something must’ve happened or a misunderstanding occurred between the two in order for cousin N to act like this. Either way, it’ll help to understand why cousin N is behaving like this. If cousin S says that nothing happened, then there’s only one person who knows what’s going on and that’s N. Try to approach her by yourself and show her that you mean no harm. Reason with her and try to ask why she dislikes S so much and why she has been ignoring you. Everything has a reason behind it whether it be small or big(:

If the entire fight is really bothering you, then try and ask your parents for some help(: Your mom can try and figure out what N has told her mom and maybe a compromise could be made before things get too out of hand.

If N continues to be unreasonable and ignorant, then I’m sorry to say but I think it’s better to just forgive and forget. If N isn’t willing to meet you halfway, then I see no reason for you to apologize for something you haven’t done. In fact, N won’t even tell you a reason as to why you “should” apologize. I advise you to be mature and let the whole thing simmer down and not do anything rash that you may regret later. Just be patient and try not to agitate either S or N.

I believe that like you said so yourself, after some time N will want you all back and she’ll approach the two of you(: Things will settle down and after some time, puzzle pieces will be put together and this entire mess will be cleared up, just you wait(:

So sorry I wasn’t able to reply to your letter sooner TiredOfProblems >< I wish you and your cousins the best(: Fighting!~

~(Chingu) 친구