Wendy: I, myself have noticed that i am slowly changing. It is almost 2013 and i already set my goals: Lose few kg, be paler, get a clear skin. Those are the goals that i want to accomplish but somehow my beats my sister beats me to it; She got it all. Al trough i can't deny it, i envy her. She is the typical girl-next-door and i also want go be similar like that. My aunt is going to meet us (we haven't seen her for a year) somewhere in the summer and, my parents decide to give her a party. They will invite all the people i know and i just want to look good. Because, i got my school photo yesterday and i looked horrible in it ( i don't exaggerate) I want to see them going next year like ''OMG, is THAT her?!''. Could you tell your opinion on it, Do you think it is worth it? I mean, do all these things for my appearance.

Friend: Dear Wendy,

If you set yourself a goal that you really want to achieve – then the sky’s your limit. Anything is possible as long as it’s within your grasp and you give it your all(:

I think that this is worth it if it makes you happy and if you’re doing this for yourself. If someone called you fat and you want to lose weight because of that, or if someone said you were ugly and you want to splatter on some makeup – then you’re doing all of this for the wrong reasons. Changing yourself should be because you want to, not because someone else is forcing their opinions onto you Wendy. I say this in pure honesty that if you change for yourself, then you can walk out of any door with confidence and poise(:

Please don’t compare yourself to your sister Wendy. All of us are different and just because you see yourself as inferior to your sister, does not mean that everyone else sees the same thing. Someone might say your sister is prettier and someone else might say so otherwise ;] Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, don’t forget that.

In all honesty, I think that appearance does matter. I’m not saying that appearance is more important than personality, because it isn’t. I’m just telling you that appearance does make a huge impact. For a job interview wouldn’t you want to look professional and mature? For a first date wouldn’t you rather look presentable rather than come in with a ratty t-shirt and some old sweatpants with flip flops? Of course you would and that’s all because of our society. We were raised to judge those based on appearance and first impressions.

I’ll give you a little insight on my life and its changes. When high school began, I was a typical freshman. I wanted to make new friends, get good grades, and live life to its fullest. Yet after seeing every girl in the hall I thought, “Wow, they’re all so pretty.” And one thing I noticed about nearly all of them were that they all had one thing in common; makeup. So of course peer pressure got to me and I ended up wearing makeup. It became such a habit that I ended up over-doing the eyeliner and…well I’ll let your imagination do what it wants (P.S. THAT’S NOT ME DON’T WORRY LOL). It went so bad that the day I didn’t wear makeup, I felt so self-conscience. I couldn’t walk down the halls with any confidence and I tried to even hide my face from my own friends :/ That day was a huge wakeup call and after that day, I put away all the makeup I didn’t need. When I stopped, my friends told me that I didn’t even look any different. Some people even told me I looked better going natural(: So you see Wendy, my point is that I began to wear makeup for all the wrong reasons. Just because everyone else was doing it and seeming prettier, I ended up joining the bandwagon. But it wasn’t worth it. Wearing makeup or being skinny doesn’t have to define a girl’s beauty(:

Do you want to know a little secret Wendy? Have you ever wondered why some girls may look average in your eyes and beautiful in someone else’s? It’s confidence. Believe it or not, so many of my guy friends have told me that one thing that makes any girl hotter is her confidence. If you feel like getting a makeover will do you justice then go for it. If you believe that if you were a bit slimmer you will have more confidence, then do so(: In the end Wendy, it’ll be your opinion that matters and no one else’s.

I’m so sorry I couldn’t reply to your letter sooner Wendy >< Don’t worry too much on that school photo, one day you’ll look back on it an laugh ;] Hope everything goes well and I wish you utter happiness in whatever you decide(:

~(Chingu) 친구