SadGurl: I don't really know how to say this..But I get really sad how people (even my family) judges me by the type of music I like..I really like kpop..and every once in a while on my facebook, I post up a cute picture about it(not every day but like once a week). I just want them to find it as a joke, but instead they say mean things like how disgusting that is..I want them to find it as a joke,but no they say "eww how horrible is that"...I really don't know what to do..Because I have friends who actually find it funny and encourage me to do that once in a while..But my family just....dislikes it alot..and they call me names now..and always tell me if i'm becoming "Lesbian" or whatsoever /:

Please help?

Friend: Dear SadGurl,

First off, please don’t be sad. Everyone is different and unique in their own ways and sometimes, others just can’t seem to accept that. However, being different shouldn’t be something you should be ashamed or sad about. Take Psy’s “Oppa Gangnam Style” (if you haven’t watched it, I’m sure it’ll put a smile on your face if you go watch it later :) ). His MV was completely different from the usual y, cutesy, or strong war-like styles you usually see in kpop. And look at that, his MV has reached millions of views and hits to a point where Justin Bieber’s agent even called him to discuss a possible partnership together. Being different is nothing to be ashamed about. You like a different style of music and I bet you that each and every one of your friends has different music they like/love as well. I mean, let’s be honest, how many friends do you actually know that are exactly the same when it comes to their music choices.

“A lot of parents will do anything for their kids except let them be themselves.” This quote was by Banksy, a popular graffiti artist. Your parents may not see the way you see, and their view points are very different from your own. You might view this kpop group to be hot and amazing, and they might just see a bunch of skinny guys doing absurd dance moves on stage with some funky colored hair. I don’t think any parents should judge their own child, especially going to a point where they call you names and such. Getting others to accept you the way you are can be quite a challenge sometimes. Sometimes you just have to meet them halfway. Ask them what’s so wrong about kpop. Take matters into your own hands and try to figure out why they continue to tease you on such a matter.

Your friends who constantly make fun of you, I guarantee that at least half of them have never even given kpop a chance. I know where you are, your friends teasing and taunting you about the people dancing weird and funny as they sing some random jibberish they don’t understand. Some of my friends even confessed that they didn’t like kpop at first just because they couldn’t understand what they were saying! But I’m telling you; don’t let it get to you. They don’t understand the fact that there’s the option to hide a person’s statuses so that it won’t appear on their newsfeed. If anything you can tell them that if they don’t like your statuses, they can unsubscribe from you. If it’s come to a point where they’re just spouting insults from every direction, I recommend you delete those friends because I promise you that they aren’t worth keeping. But remember: just because you delete someone from Facebook, doesn’t mean you guys can’t still be friends in person(: You can also have the option to make it a private album and only share those photos with the friends you know will laugh alongside you(:

Sometimes you may not have your way and you might need to be the first one to hold out your hand and offer a compromise. Sometimes people can be very dense and stubborn. Your family and friends have probably never even once given kpop a chance. They may have said they have, but I guarantee you they were only pointing out the flaws. I think that if they took a moment to actually listen to some of the songs and see the amazing lives that kpop has to offer, they wouldn’t say anything bad to you again. I’m not saying they’ll become die-hard fans and be hardcore shippers, but getting them to lighten up can be a great step in the right direction. Don’t force them to watch it if they are utterly against it though, that could just add more fuel to the fire and worsen the situation!

Now those friends who accept you and actually support you and kpop - those are your true friends that you should hold onto. They accept you for who you are and a real friend is someone you could be yourself around and not hold anything back(:

As for your family, I think you should really have a talk with them. Tell them how their words are hurting you! Don’t just be the sitting duck that sits there and takes it all! Even though they are your family, they are about as much of mind readers as I am – meaning they aren’t mind readers at all. Because they’re family, you shouldn’t feel obligated to hold back. They should accept you for who you truly are because well … that’s just what a family is meant to be(: So try and explain to them that this is something you like and it has nothing to do with your uality or any of the sort. Sometimes parents need their own children to open their eyes and show them what they’re doing wrong.

Kpop is slowly spreading around the world and more and more people know about it each and every day. So have hope, stay strong, and good luck! –insert Super Junior H’s “Good Luck” :P-

~(Chingu) 친구