"Have a nice life. You deserve it."

"You need to stay here, okay?"

"If you study hard, you'll earn a lot of money!"

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Of course! I earned this must just to not go?"

"Kyungsoo, stop! Stop! You can't do this anymore!"

"Why did she leave me?"

Kyungsoo has never forgotten the cold night of walking through the streets and ending up at the Dream Orphanage. How his mother wrapped her scrawny fingers around his hands, bending down to reach his eye level. The way his mother's sagging back strolls away from him into the darkness. Not knowing whether or not she'd come back wasn't in his mind back then, and he feels utterly idiotic for ever thinking she'd come back. He recalls escaping the orphanage after 2 weeks of living there and trying to find this one woman who had no intentions of seeing him again.

Standing in front of a house, seeing her smile and laugh with a man and child like it happened everyday was heartwrenching. The happiness his mother had disgusted him as he saw her spin the child in the air with such a huge smile he has never seen before.

But that child.

That child happens to be a jerk who tried kidnapping someone he cares about. A who wants to hurt someone so much that he's willing to go to jail for it. That damn child happens to be Lee Taemin.

"Oh, right. This is my mom — well, stepmom, anyway." The words that come out of Taemin's mouth only sting Kyungsoo's stomach as he tries to process that his biological mother is standing in front of him. Not only that, but the guy he hates is his stepbrother. His body shakes as his eyes keep widening from so many emotions flowing in his mind and heart. The redness in his eyes from his tears wanting to rip through is so strong.

His breathing is off balance as the two just stare at him, waiting for him to introduce himself. He doesn't want to. For some reason, he wants his mother to feel his wrath. He desires for her to know that her own child is standing in front of her, wanting her to feel bad for what she did to him. The way his mind is seeking for revenge and evil is shocking him. Even so, his heart knows that this woman went through the same things as him. Getting beat up, living in dread, and not knowing whether or not they were going to live. 

"H-Hello, I'm . . . M-Mr. Do, your son's teacher," he introduces himself so bitterly that it hurts. The way he calls Taemin her son just pains him even more. He refuses to say his real name or else he's going to be revealed and he doesn't want that. He wants to know if the woman recognizes who he is. He wants to see her realize that he's her real son and not Taemin. He wants to test if she recognizes him.

The woman's face turns bright which doesn't fail to amaze Kyungsoo because he's never once seen her face like this when he was around.

"Wah! Hello! I didn't realize you were his teacher. I'm his mother, Lee Sohyun," she greets with a bow, and Kyungsoo bows even if his back is rejecting it. The surname 'Lee' used to be 'Do,' and hearing it makes him want to strangle everything. She even said that she's Taemin's mother, creating the empty soul in Kyungsoo all over again. His own throat declines the swallowing of his saliva because he feels like throwing up out of misery. She carries two boxes of Taemin's things while Taemin carries one. Taemin can see how unusual Kyungsoo is reacting. He doesn't have to know Kyungsoo that well to notice how strange his behavior is. The shaking, the enlarged, red eyes, the pained expression, and how hesitant he is. Taemin's right brow raises from seeing how clenched Kyungsoo's mouth is. "So, you're neighbors with Taeminnie? That's great! Now you have a teacher to help you with homework!" She nudges Taemin with her elbow, playfully, which leads to Kyungsoo's eyes averting the joyful two. The disgust he feels is so real.

He doesn't want to see it anymore.

He's sick of his heart feeling like this.

His heart is so empty that all he feels is the stinging. The pain is so normal for him that it's become a routine he lives through every day. He's gotten so used to it that there isn't anymore to feel. Happiness is only temporary, and Kyungsoo believes that more than anything. 

"I should go," Kyungsoo's words escape his mouth in a shaky way as he grips onto his bouquet of yellow flowers that are supposed to be for Jongin. The trembling of his feet makes it hard for him to run without getting off balance, so he tries to make it as professional as possible and fast-walks to his door. Punching in his code has never been so complicated for him until now. 

"H-Hey! What about the concert?!" Taemin questions loudly even if Kyungsoo is right in front of him. But from seeing how the guy is moving so fast, he has to quickly say his words before the door closes. The door shuts leaving silence between him and his mother. He knows something is up. There's no question about it. Kyungsoo looked like he was freaking out, and he knows it. The painful look in his right eye and the darkness in the other. The only thing that messes around with his head is how Kyungsoo was only looking at his mother.

"Your teacher is interesting," Mrs. Lee chuckles as a reaction.

His eyes remind me of his.

Kyungsoo's back attaches to his front door, but he immediately detaches because he knows the two are still close. He doesn't want to be near them. He doesn't like it. She didn't recognize him, but who would after 7 years? He lays the bouquet on his kitchen counter and runs into his bedroom, locking the door. Even if no one is bound to come into his room, locking the door makes him feel more secure. Tears stroll out of his eyes naturally, nonstop. He has no control over them as he wipes them with his sleeve. Holding his teeth together, he begins to weep when he tries to hold back. The more he holds back, the louder it gets and the more pain it creates. 

"K-Kyungsoo! What the hell are you doing?!"

"Kyung! Stop! Stop this!"

He looks up slowly with no expression on his face. Oh, how empty he looks as he holds the red bottle in his right hand. The dreadful smile he gives is so awful once he flicks on the lighter with his powerless fingers.

His heart hurts like Hell, and he scrunches up his shirt as he holds onto his chest. But it hurts too much. The darkness in his heart is so painful that he decides to punch his chest harshly just so he can calm down. He wants his heart to stop hurting; he just wants it to stop. The way he grips onto his hair afterwards just damages him more because he wants to bang his head on the wall. The reminder that he's nothing to that woman, the reminder that she left him and replaced him, the reminder of how cold the room was as he shoved his head through piles of books, and the reminder of how he didn't want to live anymore. 

"Stop coming back. Just stop," he whispers with weeping in the middle. His face is so distressed that all you can see is the life being yanked out of his body.

"Kyungsoo didn't come at all. What are we supposed to tell him?" Luhan asks Sehun who stands next to him as they eye the seat that was supposed to be Kyungsoo's. "Jongin's going to be so disappointed."

"Shouldn't we try calling him again?" Sehun suggests with a saddened face because they are both worried for him.

"I tried already. The signal here is horrible. I'm really worried, Hun. He wouldn't miss something like this." Anyone can tell that Luhan is a worried soul standing inside of the concert building. After witnessing Kyungsoo try to committ suicide, nothing has ever been the same. The more distance between him, the more everything breaks down inside Luhan. Kim Jongin is the only person besides him who could ever put a smile on Kyungsoo's face. If anyone can do that, then he has to be special to the 19-year-old. Missing someone's special concert isn't something Kyungsoo would do, and that worries Luhan to a horrible extent. "You don't think he got in an accident, right?" The words that are said send shivers down Luhan's spine as his brain turns into ice from the fear of believing it.

"Don't think like that." Sehun sets his hand on Luhan's shoulder with a soft expression full of worry as well. They don't know where Kyungsoo is or what he's even doing. 

"Hey guys! I found you!" They hear from afar and look to their right to see Park Chanyeol running towards them out of breath.

"Chanyeol!" Luhan waves high in the air to signal that they see him. Chanyeol sprints over, mentally thanking Jongin for remembering the seating numbers. 

"Hey, Luhan and Sehun! Jongin wants to meet you backstage. He just got done with high-fiving the fans," explains Chanyeol as he fans himself because of running from the backstage to the front audience in this damn building. He suddenly realizes that Luhan and Sehun are the only ones present. There's only one person that makes Jongin go crazy and that is the devil that lives next door. "Where's Kyungsoo?" He questions in curiosity from knowing how Jongin is expecting to see the guy. The couple's heads both drop down after hearing the question they can't answer.

"We don't know