"Fine. Then give up something that's important to you. I lost my dominant hand, now you must lose something. I gave up drawing because of you, so you have to give up something. You want to redeem yourself? Then do this." Hansol's hands are in fists as his forehead shows wrinkles from being furious. Sehun and Luhan stand in front of him with enlarged eyes from hearing this. They don't even know how to react to this deal. Sehun's heart is being sprinkled with acid as he thinks of the thought of losing Luhan. He doesn't want to do it.

But he bullied this kid so much during high school that he can't use his dominant hand anymore. The kid had to give up his love and dreams because of what he did and it hurts him even more to know that he ran away from such a tragedy. He tries thinking in Hansol's perspective. What would it be like to be hit and kicked for years? What would it be like to have your dominant hand crushed so much that you can't use it anymore? What would it be like to give up the dream you wanted so much just because of a bully?

It's painful; real painful.

The guilt Sehun feels is so harsh that he ended up hiding himself behind a mask just because showing his face is a sin to him. He never wanted his face to be remembered or even cared for. He wanted to hide so badly. He wanted to stand in the dark forever because of what he did in the past. Hitting students for just standing in his presence, kicking people because they dared to mess with him, and feeling good about people thinking he's the strongest one; how no one can possibly be higher than his rank in toughness.

But his culpability is too strong. Crushing Hansol's left hand feels like squeezing his own heart. 

If the people think you're the strongest, are you really the strongest?

After crushing Hansol's drawing hand with bricks that fell while he was beating him, he finally knew what it meant to have your heart waver even the slighest bit. Not in a romantic way but in blameworthiness.

"Fine. I'll give it up."

"Great. Meet me here at 5pm tomorrow and tell me or even show me what you're giving up. I'll be sure to watch you give it up as well," Hansol says with an evil tone. Sehun can't help but think how much Hansol has changed. He used to sit in silence only drawing in his sketchbook. Sehun remembers ripping one of his sketchbooks for fun, and his stomach stings just from recalling the memory.

Luhan stares at Sehun with well-rounded eyes because he noticed Sehun glancing at him after he heard "something that's important to you." He suddenly has a bad feeling of what's going to happen and it keeps growing by the second.

Hansol leaves without another word, leaving Sehun and Luhan alone in the parking lot.

"L-Luhan, I know I've kept it a secret. You have every right to get angry with me. I was a bully and a jerk, but I swear that I'm different—"

"You think I don't know that? That you're different now? Sehun, you're one of the sweetest people I've ever met in my entire life. But what you did . . . why did you hide? The kid lost his dream because you injured his hand, and you ran away? I know you're already redeeming yourself. You don't even know how damn well I know that. But you left the one thing that is the most important in redeeming yourself, Oh Sehun!" Luhan yells at him with crying eyes that only make Sehun feel like breaking down even more. The person he loves is crying because of him. "I-I want to go home, please." The soft, hurt voice Luhan brings starts watering Sehun's eyes as well. The two men that stand in the parking lot are crying because of the pain they feel.

"Alright," Sehun says in his own soft, pained voice that rings in Luhan's ears forever. Such a short word can bring out so much emotion in his heart. 

The way the two walk next to each other as they go towards Sehun's car is unnatural and distant. Luhan wants to stand closer to Sehun with a warmer feeling in his stomach and so does Sehun, but they both know that if they do so, they'll hear their sniffing from crying louder than before when they were distant. They approach the gray car in mute and open the doors. As Sehun drives, he notices how Luhan's not even looking at him; he's staring out the window trying to hide his sniffing. Not only Luhan is sniffing, but Sehun is too. 

Sehun was too scared. Too scared to tell Luhan all of his dark secrets and past and see the hurt face Luhan is making right now. There is a difference in what Sehun was thinking Luhan's reaction would be. He thought that Luhan would be hurt from knowing he was a bully and smashed a guy's dreams, but Luhan isn't thinking that way. Luhan is more pained to know that Sehun kept it from him and how he ran away to hide himself. Sehun couldn't be more shocked than now.

Driving into the apartment parking lot, they feel more heavyhearted than before. Entering the building is an achievement, but entering the elevator is an accomplishment. They arrive at the 6th floor and exit the transporter with dropped hearts. Luhan punches in his passcode as Sehun punches in his. 

"Good night, Sehun," Luhan says quietly yet loud enough for Sehun to hear him. Luhan enters his apartment without sparing a glance toward Sehun's figure. Sehun is surprised to hear his boyfriend's voice and turns his head to only see the rush of Luhan's figure leave him. Viewing how Luhan's door closes feels like Luhan is shutting him out of the world. Sehun's saliva never tasted so bitter before.

Luhan slips off his jacket and tosses it on his drawer. The painful feeling he has is so massive that more tears start drowning his eyes. He wipes them with his hands that seem too weak to do so. Knowing Sehun was a bully is heartbreaking and knowing how he hurt someone so much couldn't be more saddening. He can't imagine how Sehun felt in that apartment all alone. The past must have haunted him and it stings Luhan's stomach even more. The more Luhan thinks about Sehun in pain, the more tears stroll down his cheeks. His teeth clench strongly as he keeps wiping his tears.

What a first date.

Sehun stands inside his bedroom with an empty feeling in his stomach. The room feels cold, but he thinks it's himself that is colder than the room. He doesn't bother to change clothes and sits in the corner of his room in the darkness, full of dispirit. Meeting Ji Hansol coincidentally is too amazing. Sehun is starting to believe that the world is small, a bit too small. Dropping his head onto his knees, the only thing that can be heard is his weeping. He can feel his warm tears drop on his pants, but they feel heavy and harsh. He doesn't even know what to do anymore. It's too much to handle.

"J-Jongin," Kyungsoo says the name in surprise as Jongdae's arm is still wrapped around his neck.

Jongin is witnessing the Kim Jongdae that left Kyungsoo so coldly in the pass laugh along with Kyungsoo as his arm is wrapped around his shoulder. The Kim Jongdae that pushed Kyungsoo away like trash after Kyungsoo's mother did what she did. On top of that, Kyungsoo was smiling along with Jongdae. The smile Jongin can only make happen. He can't help but think he's selfish to think he can be the only one to make Kyungsoo smile. Kyungsoo realizes this by reading Jongin's mind and quickly removes Jongdae's arm from his shoulder.

"Ah, Kim Jongin!" Jongdae snaps his finger and points at the guy with a bright face. "You're Soo's friend, right?" Jongin nods slowly with an expressionless face already hating the guy more than anything. The nickname 'Soo' has him feeling more infuriated because it shows how the two have gotten close. Jongin saw it; the two were walking down the sidewalk, eating sundaes, and laughing and smiling like nothing happened to them in the past. Even if Jongin has nothing to do with it, he feels enraged. He doesn't know that Jongdae had his reasons for doing what he did and he doesn't know that it was to protect Kyungsoo. All he knows is that this damn man told Kyungsoo that he didn't need him anymore right after he witnessed his mother forgetting all about his existence. If anything, Jongin hates the guy and is not happy to see the smiles and laughter from their mouths.

"Why is he with you?" Jongin questions Kyungsoo with furrowed brows as his hand tightens on the handle of his gym bag. Kyungsoo carefully reads Jongin's mind realizing the guy doesn't know how Jongdae did what he did to protect him.

"Does he know? About your past?" Jongdae whispers in Kyungsoo's ear which only raises Jongin's temper. Jongin can only feel infuriated thinking how the guy even dares to whisper in Kyungsoo's ear so naturally. What he doesn't understand the most is how Kyungsoo doesn't even care! The guy that betrayed him seven years ago is whispering into his ear like they are buddies! Jongin is confused but can't help but feel fumed.

Kyungsoo nods his head lightly. From seeing Jongin's gym bag and him in sweats, he knows this guy has been in his practice room. He hasn't seen Jongin in days which feels empty and strange. Kyungsoo understands that Jongin's concert is coming up but not seeing him every morning and hour of his life can be a little bi