First thing in the morning you hate to see the most, you wound yourself even deeper when you see him. Why does it have to be now when you badly want see him the other times but didn’t get to? You have a long eye-contact with him, it felt as if you’re breathing through the same air as him, looking at the same reflection. His blazing stare pierce right into your soul through every second, then you realize that you couldn’t let go of him, and so does he.

Don’t stare at me like that, I might not be able to forgive myself. Kyungsoo looked away as he cannot stand to pulverize you any longer.

Don’t stare at me like that, I might not be able to stand myself forgiving you. You looked away as you cannot stand to be pulverize by him any longer.

You played along with his avoidance, not getting near each other, not looking at each other, and not hurting each other. He is a coward who couldn’t explain to you why he did that, you were a coward for not being able to stand by him when deep inside he wanted you the most. Nothing works well for the both of you, all you can hope for is to let the time slowly heal and explain everything.

You walk out of the practice room and bump into Miss Sung Jung, she looked at you with a serious stare, almost evil but apologetic at the same time. Did you really love her? You’re defeated by such beauty before you, it makes you lose self-confidence by comparison. She came to reveal the situation and also to clear everything about the scandal, which in result is false. Her agent already posted an article revealing the true story behind it, it was because of her selfishness and greediness for love. Moreover, she is most apologetic to the fans for causing such riots to their dearest boys, and you, whom she successfully break the both of you up.

I guess it’s really over. You went to the bathroom and washed your hand. You look at yourself in the mirror, how ugly and horrible you look right now. Your fingers went up to your lips, touching the tip of the pluff lip. This place. You talk to yourself in your mind. Should’ve never been touched. Your first tear fell. You wipe it roughly until its ridden red, with some skin layers peeled off and little red blood smearing to make it redder. You wash your lips with hot water and soap, it breaks your heart so much every time you wipe and think about those times when he would kissed you. Twice or thrice a time is not enough to erase his mark, you want to damage your lips, damage his heart, damage yourself for satisfaction. You cried softly as you no longer feel anything on your lips, it went numb and empty.

Areum: “Oh my gosh! What happen to your lips?!” Areum unnie enter the restroom to see you standing in front of the mirror, with your lips bleeding and dripping down on your jaw.

You: “Huh?” You look at her as if nothing happen to you. You forgot what you just did despite not feeling the pain on your swollen lips.

Areum: “Your lips! They’re bleeding!” Areum unnie quickly grabbed some tissues and wipe your lips with a little water dabbed on it.

You: “They’re bleeding?” You turn to look at the mirror. “Oh my god.”

Areum: “What’s wrong with you? Are you okay? Are you sick?” She quickly feel your forehead with a worried expression.

You: “Am I? I don’t know what just happen?” You really forgot what just happen, because your emotions completely have control over your conscious mind, you went crazy for a moment.

Areum: “Let’s go to the office desk and I’ll get some treatment for you.” She held you around the shoulder to guide you over to the office desk.

Areum unnie took out her aid box full of all types of medicine for injuries. She dabbed a little bit of some sting medicine on your lips, you finally felt the pain. Your lips were completely swollen and red, it also puffed out a little. After applying some of the medicine, she took out a white mask to cover your lips. You had no idea that it would be this serious, though you just remembered that you wanted to damage your lips at that moment. Now, you kinda regretted for harming yourself over such personal emotions. You also realize that you’re childish and stupid, these intended self-harm acts are ridiculous when you think about it.

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