I feel like you could have given a more details in the summary of the description. However, I love that you put a prologue with a bit of a cliffhanger in the foreword.  

Appearance: 5/5

Nice poster and the color complements the mood. 

Plot: 13/15

At first I was cringing because the interactions seemed strained, which was the whole point, but then how you brought in the was brilliant. I just wish the rising action wasn't drawn out as much, and the resolution wasn't so inconclusive. I know you probably meant it to be that way to have a sequel, but every story should have a conclusion or some sort of epiphany, even if it's open-ended. I need you to tell me why the story is important, why I read all of that. You don't have to tell me outright what you wanted me to feel, but you should at least give me a clue of what your theme is. 

Originality: 14/15

I see a lot of stories like "I'm converting my gay husband to straight" so that's probably why I wouldn't be attracted to your story at first. However, now that I've read the whole thing, I can see that this story definitely stands out. 

Grammar/Spelling: 17/20

You have misspelled words now and then 

(e.g. seeping instead of sleeping in ch. 1) 

Sometimes you're missing helping verbs or you're using the wrong tense of it. Also, sometimes you use words in a way they shouldn't. Like when you describe Sehun's way of talking as heartlessly, I think you mean "with no emotion". Heartlessly implies that he's cold or having negative intentions. Be careful on repeated words. While they provide connection, they also make the story dull. 

Characterization: 9/10

Most of the characters were really realistic in their reaction. However, Sooyoung tended to be a bit contradictory through her actions, as she would act one way in one chapter but that part of her was never consistent. I didn't get the feel of what she was like, which is important, even if she's a minor character. 

Flow: 8/10

The voice you used was confusing. Sometimes I felt like you were trying to do 3rd POV omniscient where you had some narrator making comments in the background, other times it was 3rd POV limited. I know you're trying to establish background in the beginning of the story, but it messes up the flow. Your chapters were linked in a consistent manner, and I never felt that was choppy. 

Overall Enjoyment: 8/10

I'm not going to lie that if I was following this story, I would probably have stopped following around ch. 9 or somewhere because I felt like the story wasn't going anywhere. However, you definitely won me back with the ending. Great job!

Total: 84/100