“When two hearts beat together, the third one is conceived. Making a decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body”

My freak button is on while driving to the nearest coffee shop in Hongdae. I’m telling you, my heart is pounding in my throat and my mind doesn’t know what to think anymore. I don’t know, but if what I’m thinking is true, I’ll surely have mix emotions about it.

Yes, a baby is really God’s blessing, most especially, when you and your husband wants it so badly.  Thing is, if I’m really pregnant already, I will surely have to give up a lot of things and commitments as well. Truth is, I’m not that sure if I’m already ready to be a mother, but if there’s one thing I’m sure about that is, my husband wants this more than anything and if this will make him happy, I’ll take everything in and go with whatever is waiting for me in motherville.

The moment I spotted Eun hee at the coffee shop, I rushed to her and started talking right away. I know that my lovely Mouse isn’t ready for this talk early in the morning, but I really have to have a support system and I know so well that she’s perfect for it.

“Wait…can you get to the point already coz trouble twin…you are repeating the same thing over and over again and yet…I can’t even understand or get whatever you want to tell me” she said after I talked for I don’t know how long.

"MOUSE! I THINK I’M PREGNANT!” I exclaimed and she looked around right away to check if someone is listening.

“What was that again?” she asked as if she didn’t hear what I just said.

“Mouse…I said…I think…I’m pregnant” I repeated and she just looked at me in shock.

I know that this is really too sudden, but what can I do? I’m married, and it’s just normal for me to get pregnant.

“How can you say that? How did this happen?” she asked and it seems like she’s more messed up than me.

“Oh gosh! How did this happen? Are you freakin serious with that question? How did this happen? Of course…this happened because my husband and I had …well…we are so active and we are not using any protection anymore…I don’t know…but…I have a strong feeling that I am carrying a baby” I told her and she gasped in disbelief.

“This is really going to blow everyone’s mind up” she said and I sighed heavily.

“I know…what am I going to do Mouse?” I asked and she smirked.

“Easy! We will go to the doctor right now” she stood up from her seat and I grabbed her hand, making her to fall back down to her seat again.

“What?” she asked, annoyed.

I know that there’s only one way for us to know if I really am carrying a baby or not, but something inside me is really holding me back. I don’t know if I’m just scared to know what’s really going on or worried that if things are not the way I think it is, I might just get disappointed.

“Just…sit first” I told her and she rolled her eyes at me.

“You know what? If we’re just going to sit here doing nothing….we will not be able to find out what’s really going on with you” she said and I nod my head.

“I know that…but…just give me a few more minutes to straighten my mind up and organize my thoughts” I said and she sighed.

“Mouse” I called after a few minutes of being silent.

“mmmm”

“If I’m really pregnant…doesn’t that mean…I didn’t go by the conditions of my contract? I mean…I have non-pregnancy contracts with Victoria’s Secret and Chanel…and I have a feeling that once they learn about this…they will terminate my contract and that will give me a bad image” I said and she stared at me.

“Trouble twin…you know so well that there are a lot of angels that got pregnant unexpectedly even with a non-pregnancy contract…let’s just take it from Miranda Kerr….that girl was given the same contract like yours and she got pregnant all of a sudden…and after nine months of not being an angel…she came back like nothing happened…you see…I don’t really think that this is going to be a problem…trust me…. these companies will not make a big deal out of it and it’s as if they can stop you and your husband from having …this is all normal….I’m sure they’ll understand” she comforted me, but I’m still lost.

Honestly, I’m not yet ready to give up my wings any time soon. Yes, my contract with Victoria’s Secret is about to end already, but we are talking about renewing it right after. Now, I don’t even know if I can renew it again for there is a possibility that they won’t let me in the group anymore.

“One more thing” I said and Eun hee sighed impatiently “How can I continue filming when if I’m pregnant?” I asked and she smirked.

“Let me just tell you that when Sarah Jessica Parker was filming the last episodes of and the City…she was oh-so-pregnant…her stylists are pure geniuses for they were able to keep her baby bump from showing all throughout...you see…I’m a genius…and I’m your stylist…so you have nothing to worry about at all…I can assure you that if ever you’re really pregnant…we can hide that baby bump of yours without even the people knowing that you have swallowed a watermelon” she said, making me laugh.

“You are super insane” I told her and she giggled.

“So….are you ready to go to the doctor?” she asked and I just stared at her.

“Oh please! C’mon! Ishi…if you’re not going to go to the doctor…how in hell will you know if you’re pregnant or not?” she asked and I sighed.

“Fine! Let’s go now!” I stood up from my seat and walked out of the coffee shop with a heavy heart and totally disheveled mind.

I’m telling you, it’s not that easy to bring yourself together when you’re too ed up to even think right. I know that if this comes out positive, happiness will embrace not only me, but our family as well. But if this turns negative, I’d be devastated for I’ve already made myself believe that I am carrying G-dragon’s baby.

“Why is this so freakin weird?” I asked Eun hee while waiting for the doctor.

“You know what’s weird?” she asked and I looked at her curiously.

“This” she showed me a picture of a pregnant lady who has the biggest baby bump that I’ve ever seen in my whole damn life.

“Is that even possible?” I asked in shock while staring intently at the picture.

This is freaking the hell out of me. How did that woman’s bump got so big? This is just so unbelievable and unrealistic. I must admit, I was extremely frightened just by the thought of me having that kind of bump like hers.

“Oh please!” Eun hee snapped and looked at me all of a sudden.

“Of course she’ll be having a big baby bump!” she said, totally confusing me.

“Huh?” I asked and she started laughing.

“Trouble twin…this woman is carrying six babies in her womb…no wonder she’s got a big bump” she said and I nearly banged my head on the wall.

How can we not read the article first? I feel like a total idiot for I haven’t even thought that she might be carrying not only one, not only two, but a lot more babies. How can I freak myself out right away?

“Does Jiyong’s family have a line of multiples?” Eun hee asked and I started thinking.

“mmm…none” I answered.

“How about in your side? Do you have any line of multiples in your family?” she asked.

As far as my memory can remember, my grandmother’s sisters are twins and even though I haven’t met them even once, she told me that they both have twins as kids too.

“As a matter of fact…we have” I answered and she squealed.

“OH MY GOSH! There’s a possibility of you having twins as well!” she said excitedly, making the other pregnant women to look at us.

“Shut it Mouse…these people doesn’t know who I really am…zip it!” I told her and she covered with her hand, but is still looking so excited.

Well, if God will give us multiples, I’m pretty sure that it will bring happiness to our household more. I think, having twins or triplets will really be practical for I don’t have to give birth again after that because we have reached our quota already.  I’m still in my “3 kids” only policy and I have no plans in adding more to it.

And the moment has come. The doctor called my name, she checked on me, got my blood sample and made me wait. I don’t know how long I’ve waited, but I can clearly say that it’s the longest wait that I’ve ever had in my entire existence.

“I already have the results” Doctor Oh said while holding a piece of paper in hand.

“What does it say?” I asked nervously.

“Well” she stared at me with a serious expression on her face “I’m…” she stopped mid-way, totally pissing me off for it’s so obvious that she’s hanging me.

“What?” I asked impatiently.

“I’m so happy to tell you that you’re going to be a mommy soon” she finally blurted out and I suddenly don’t know what’s the different of fantasy and reality.

Did I hear her right? Is this paper legit? Am I really going to be a mother already? This is really a shock and I don’t even know how to pull things off starting from now. Honestly, I don’t even know how to break this news to my husband.

“Alright…I have to calm down” I said, making Eun hee laugh like crazy.

“Yeah…you really have to coz your fetus is going to be rattled if you continue spazzing over it” she said, making me laugh so loud.

I just can’t get over it! Seriously, I’m on cloud nine right now and not even a single demon can make my day crappy. I’m telling you, all of the worries that I have in mind was washed out the moment I saw the word positive on my result paper.

“Oh ! Thank goodness you’re already here!” Eon said the moment Eun hee and I walked in the apartment.

“Sorry Eon” I sat beside him on the couch and wrapped an arm around him.

“Aigoo…why do you look so happy and where have the two of you been?” he asked and I smiled widely at him.

“That smile is telling me that something freaky is going to come out from that mouth of yours” he said and I squealed all of sudden.

“OMO! What is up with you?” he asked curiously and I pulled him for a hug.

“I’M PREGNANT!” I shouted in glee and my dear manager just can’t grasp the news yet.

It took Eon a good hour to absorb my baby news and it really ed his mind up. Of course, he’s happy for me and G-dragon, but at the same time, he’s worried for my career coz it can rea