*None of the tweets are true*

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“In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured”

It seems like life is still in a fast lane for me and Ishi. Right now, we’re living so far away from each other and I’m losing my mind already for I’m worried about her and our baby. I don’t know why I even permitted her to continue working. Oh well, it’s so late for regrets anyway.

A week ago, Ishi left for the New York to participate at the annual Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. Yes, it’s a bit risky for travelling is not advisable for pregnant women like her, but I don’t have a choice anymore for she has committed to the job even before she got pregnant. This is so hard for me. I’m telling you, I cannot sleep well because my mind can think of is her and how she’s doing.

“Aigoo” I said the moment I got out from bed.

“Why isn’t she calling me?” I checked my phone for I don’t know how many times already and there’s not even a single message from her.

And with that, I just go with my rituals. I prepared breakfast for myself and then prepared for work. I’m really grateful for recordings are keeping me busy. Now I can already say that preparing for a comeback album after years of hiatus isn’t easy at all. The members and I really have to take things a notch higher to be able to level the artists today. We’re not getting any younger and it’s so hard to sell for there are a lot of idol groups out there that are more appealing than us now. I guess, this is me talking without confidence. No. I have faith in Big Bang and the VIPs. This album is going to work. Yes. It is going to work.

On my way to the YG building, I decided to drop by Dami-noona’s boutique in Hongdae first. I really think that a good talk with my sister will calm my nerves down.

“Oh! Why are you here?” Noona asked upon seeing me walk in.

“I need someone to talk to” I answered and she chuckled.

“Aigoo…are you still worried about Ishi?” she asked and I sighed.

“I can’t help it noona…I mean…she’s so far away from me ….not only that…she’s freakin pregnant! I don’t even know why I let her continue with this” I told her and she gave me a chair and made me sit.

“You know what? That’s also the question running in my mind…why did you let her work knowing that she’s in a delicate state?” she asked and I started thinking.

Truth is, I’m totally against all this. I’ve always been open to her about my thoughts in certain matters and I made it clear that I’m not in favor of her working. But then again, Ishi is Ishi. She’s stubborn and she’ll push whatever she wants. Yes, she listens, but at the end of the day, her thoughts will be the ones that’ll matter. In all fairness to my wife, she did listen to me this time and agreed when I told her that she has to stop working after the filming of her series finished.

“Noona…Ishi has committed to that job already and she just wants to finish it...most especially…there’s a possibility that it’ll be her last fashion show as an angel” I said and she sighed.

“I can understand her…but…the fact that she’ll be so worked up is alarming…I mean…we know how hard their rehearsals can be…she’s going to carry heavy wings and wear sky high heels as well…this is really risky…I’m telling you…one slip can ruin everything” she said and it made me more nervous.

“What do you think shall I do noona? Should I call JYP Sajangnim and ask him to talk to Ishi?” I asked with my disheveled mind.

“Jiyongie…do you think a word from JYP Sajangnim can make Ishi go home right away? You know your wife so well…she’s not the kind of person who will let people stop her from what she wants to do…well…unless you get angry at her” she said, making me chuckle.

“AISH! Why can’t I say no to her? Why am I always agreeing in whatever she wants?” I asked, making noona laugh so loud.

“You want an honest answer?” she asked and I just waited for her to continue.

“YOU” she pointed at me “love your wife so much that you cannot even bring yourself to disappoint her…that you’re good with whatever just for her to get what she wants…but Jiyong…it’s not always like that…you’re the man in your relationship…you wear the pants….you have to stand up for what you want…you have to push for what you think is right most especially when it involves her safety and the baby’s…I have nothing against with how you guys handle your relationship…but from another person’s point of view…I can say that Ishi can manipulate you in just a snap” she continued and it really shook my whole being.

After hearing my sister out, my mind went wild for I keep on thinking of the times when Ishi manipulated me. Honestly, she always got things her way and she’s not on the wrong side for I’m letting her get it. I don’t know, but seeing my wife disappointed gives me pain. After all, we talk about things first before deciding. But I must admit, I’ve spoiled her to the point that there are times wherein she doesn’t listen or care about my say on things anymore.

“Is it bad? Noona…you know so well that making Ishi happy is really my goal in life…seeing her in dread and holding her back to whatever she wants to do hurts me…I still wear the pants….it’s just that…I’ve spoiled her too much” I admitted and Noona sighed heavily.

“There’s nothing bad with what you’re doing…thing is…Ishi has to know that your decision counts…that she has to go by what you want as well…actually…Ishi is not the problem here…it’s you” she said and I looked at her curiously.

“Me? How can it be me?” I asked in confusion.

“Jiyong…you have to stay firm whenever you decide on something…yes...you talk things out first before making a move…but…at the end of the day…the one that you talked about were always brushed off and you go with whatever you feel is going to work even though you haven’t deliberated on it that much…as I’ve said…you should be the one who has the last say…this is how marriage life works baby brother...so if I were you…talk to yourself…think about the things that might happen to Ishi in the States….and then…decide on whether you’ll make her stop whatever she’s doing or let her continue what she started…it’s not going to be easy for it’ll surely start a fight…but…if this is the only way to get her and the baby out of danger…then let it be…after all…a few days of ignoring each other and being in a love quarrel is just a petty thing” she said and I really put every word in heart.

Maybe Noona is right. I really have to stand up for what I think is better for our family than risk my wife and our baby’s life. This whole modeling thing is going to tire the of Ishi and with her delicate state, the least that she’ll do is get tired and stressed.

After that talk, I nearly booked a flight to the States without even thinking of the things that I’ll be leaving here in Korea. Good thing, I was able to organize my thoughts first before making a move.

“What’s up with you? Why do you look like you’ve been stepped on by a hundred bulls?” Teddy hyung asked.

“Hyung…do you think Ishi is manipulating me? Am I not being a man?” I asked and he gave me a weird look.

“Yaaa…where in hell does those questions came from?” he asked and I sighed.

“I talked with my noona before coming here…I went to her because I really need someone to talk