“Stab the body and it heals, but injure the heart and the wound lasts a lifetime”

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                                    {Exclusive: Glam couple on the rocks}

It’s been a month since Ishi and G-dragon’s baby passed, but the talk of their separation is still a hot topic up until now. It was said that the couple is living separately for the mean time. Some fans even camped out of the Kwons’ residence just to confirm things and it seems like the rumors are true. According to them, G-dragon is the only one left in their mansion for their daughter, Athena is with Ishi. None from the YG and JYP Entertainment has confirmed anything but some insiders said that Ishi along with their daughter is renting a place in Gangnam district as of the moment.

“This is not a break-up….the couple just wants to have some space to think things through and in one way or another move on from their loss” the insider shared.

We all know how hard it is to lose someone that we love and time is all we need to heal. Maybe the Glam couple is still in the process of taking reality in and moving on, as we all know is hard. We’re pretty sure that things are going to get light for them sooner or later. 

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How hard can things be? Why am I being dragged to hell? No. I’m already in hell and I don’t even know if I can still pull myself up once again. I’m totally wrecked. I feel like I was stabbed to death for so many times and was killed again because my husband is the one who brought me into this situation. I can’t blame him though, but I still can’t believe that he was able to do this to me. Questions cloud my mind and up until now I don’t have answers in any of them.

I’m left in dread. I’m one miserable woman who doesn’t know how to live anymore. Yes, I know that I’m being unreasonable and totally pathetic, but can you blame me? I’ve lost a child and the way I lost it is just so tragic.

“Ishi…please…listen to us” Eun hee said hours after my surgery.

“Mouse…if you’re going to explain whatever happened awhile ago…don’t dare anymore because my mind is so close right now” I told her and she sighed heavily.

“I know that it’s hard….but there’s no point in getting mad at your husband…he just did what he has to do…he saved you from death and I really think you should be thankful for that” she said and I shook my head.

“He should’ve told me that he will do this instead of hiding it…I mean….I feel like he betrayed me….fine! He did this to save me…but this is so against my will” tears rolled down my cheeks in a snap and my heart become heavier.

Eun hee shook her head and smirked “You know what? You’re being a again…all of us are commending Jiyong for what he did…yes…this is all against your will…but this is the right thing to do…that baby will kill the hell out of you…and I’m so happy because it’s already out….Trouble twin…move on…open your mind and heart….don’t let your emotions rule you…just be thankful that you’re alive” she said and walked out of the room.

After that, all I want is to be alone. I don’t wanna entertain anyone. Everything is still so fresh and my pain is really killing me. I hate being like this, but I don’t know how to get out of the dark. I want to see the light and move on but something inside me doesn’t even want to move an inch. Hating the world will definitely be the most stupid thing ever, but that’s what I’m feeling right now. I hate everyone. I hate my life. I hate this world. I hate myself.

Days passed by and I’m still ignoring everybody. They’re visiting me, but I’m not giving a damn on all of them at all. My husband is the one taking care of me day and night but to me he’s like a ghost. I can see him but ignores for all I can feel is anger. My love for G-dragon is stronger than hate, but whenever our eyes meet, I can’t help but be reminded of what he did to our baby.

“Omma” Athena climbed up the bed and lay beside me.

“How are you now?” she looked at me with her most radiant smile.

“I’m good” I answered and forced a smile.

The only person who can talk to me is my daughter for she’s got nothing to do with all of this, and how can I ignore my only child in the first place?

“Are you going out of this room already?” she asked.

“I don’t know beautiful…I guess Omma still needs to stay here for a while” I answered while her hair.

“Appa told me that you’re getting better and once your wound healed…we’ll be going home already” she said and I sighed heavily.

I don’t know if I can take living with G-dragon as of the moment. I was actually thinking of leaving our house first for I really don’t know how to deal with my husband yet. I know that what I’m about to do is totally stupid, but I just can’t take being in one roof with him right now.

A week passed and I’m getting better already. I can sit and walk a few steps as well. According to my doctor, they removed a part of my fallopian tube that was damaged because of the baby. I researched about it right after she told me that and what I’ve found really shocked me. It was said that women whose tubes are partially or completely removed will have a slim chance on getting pregnant again. This alone made me so mad. I don’t know what to do anymore. Just by thinking that my recent pregnancy can be my last already is enough to kill me. All I want is to give G-dragon what he wants and now that it’s going to be hard for me to get pregnant again, I feel like I’m depriving him of that one thing that he desires the most. But thinking of it, we’re still lucky for we have Athena. But then again, it still for the three kids that we want are already impossible.

The doctor told me that I can go home in the middle of that week already and at that point, I don’t know if I can take being with G-dragon again. It’s been weeks since we last talked and up until now, I’m giving him the