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“Look!” Kyuhyun grinned widely as he showed Hyukjae a new flower. “It’s just as beautiful as you are,” he chuckled lowly as he kissed Hyukjae’s cheek. “Actually, you’re way more beautiful than it is.”

Hyukjae didn’t even seem to listen or pay any kind of attention to what Kyuhyun had to say. But he did look at the flower. It was another perfect flower. The white petals were small but there were so many that it was hard trying to focus in only one of them. He slowly moved his fingers, reaching up his hand to take the flower before Kyuhyun put it away once more.

“I’ll leave it here Hyuk,” Kyuhyun smiled and left the flower on the bedside table. He didn’t seem to notice the flower from the day before had disappeared. “I’ll go to work now. Have something to eat, there’s plenty of food in the kitchen,” he smiled widely, holding Hyukjae’s small and cold hands. “I love you, my dear Hyukjae.” It was low tuned. Kyuhyun wasn’t sure if Hyukjae was even listening to his words, still, he had to say it.

It had been so long since he had been craving for Hyukjae, that having him in front of him was already miraculously. He looked at his features and didn’t take too long to caress them gently with his fingertips. Beautiful. Hyukjae was still beautiful, just as he had always been. Dazzling. Kyuhyun was stunned by such a human being.

“God, I really love you,” Kyuhyun chuckled for himself before leaning up closer to slowly kiss Hyukjae’s lips, just a simple peck. “I’ll be back soon, my love.”

Although he had to leave, it took Kyuhyun a huge amount of effort to do so. Especially since Hyukjae was sitting there, just waiting for nothing.

How much Kyuhyun wished he could make the love of his life come back to himself once more.

The door of the house closed and Hyukjae stood there, doing nothing but just breathing. It took him three whole hours for him to even turn to look at the flower by his side.

There was no expression on his face, but his hand slowly and patiently reached for the flower, carefully bringing it closer to him.

Two more hours passed before he stood up and walked to the door. His steps were unhurried, passive. It seemed like he didn’t have time in mind as he opened the door and went out. He didn’t mind in looking around or trying to find out where he was. He only held his flower firmly but lovingly and walked to a destination he already had in mind.

“Sir! Sir! You cannot go out!”

Hyukjae didn’t pay any thought on whatever the man had to say to him. He probably didn’t even pay attention of the existence of anything else but himself, the flower, and his destination.

“Sir!”

Seemingly, that person didn’t know Hyukjae shouldn’t be touched by someone else but the ones he loves.

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Kyuhyun was trying to make everything as fast as possible. He wanted to take Hyukjae out to have dinner together and Siwon had also confirmed it hours ago.

He heard his phone ringing and he ignored it for a few minutes before it rang again.

Sighing deeply, he left the pen he had in his hand to grab his cellphone and answered coldly. “Yes?”

“Sir! Your wife is out, I don’t know how to stop him! He doesn’t allow me to even touch him and he doesn’t listen to me!” The teen Kyuhyun had hired seemed to be especially useless in that kind of situation.

“,” Kyuhyun groaned, standing up from his seat and quickly going to grab his jacket. “I’m going there, send me your location to my phone.”

It took Kyuhyun almost an hour to finally reach the place and he found Hyukjae trembling in the corner of a park, with the teen he had hired to take care of him looking at the other desperately, not knowing what else to do.

“Hyuk!” Kyuhyun ran towards his wife, wrapping his arms around him. “It’s alright, I’s sorry,” he sighed deeply, hugging him even tighter. “Let’s go home Hyuk, you need to rest.”

But Hyukjae was just trembling slightly. He didn’t even flinch at Kyuhyun’s touch. It was as if Kyuhyun didn’t exist once more, as if he was completely alone in the planet. He didn’t look at Kyuhyun. Hyukjae didn’t even acknowledge his existence.

Just a few minutes later, Kyuhyun had dismissed the teenager he had hired and took Hyukjae to his car, riding back home.

He didn’t know Hyukjae was trembling because he had lost the flower he was holding dearly.

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“I don’t know what to do,” Kyuhyun said frustrated. “I really don’t know. I tried locking the door but how stupid do you think I am to believe Hyukjae is not capable of opening it without trouble?”

Siwon sighed, pouring more wine into Kyuhyun’s cup. “How long has it been?”

“Ever since he came here and I go to work,” Kyuhyun answered sadly before his face lifted up in excitement. “Maybe he’s looking for me!”

Just a second after, Siwon had hit his nape already. “He doesn’t even know you exist.” He laughed softly. “I don’t know, it’s been like two weeks already, maybe he wants something.”

Kyuhyun sighed, massaging the back of his head slowly. “I don’t know. I give him everything I can. I play some music too, just in case he wants to dance… you know?” He played gently with his glass of wine. “I give him a flower every day, but I guess he just throws it away because I haven’t seen them at all.”

“It’s dangerous for him to go out like that,” Siwon nodded. “It’s probably just a disorder associated, you know? He just wants to walk without any kind of sense of direction. Happens a lot in psychiatric patients…”

Kyuhyun threw a death glare at his friend. “He doesn’t have that disorder,” he didn’t even seem convinced of what he was saying. “I think…”

“I’ll make an appointment with the neuropsychiatrist,” Siwon said as he stood up from his seat of the bar. “I have surgery now, so I won’t be able to visit Hyukjae in the afternoon. Let’s meet tomorrow.”

Kyuhyun sighed and nodded. “Alright,” he simply said. “Go get me after work, then.”

“Sure,” Siwon smiled softly, messing Kyuhyun’s hair before going out, leaving Kyuhyun to finish his glass of wine alone.

Hyukjae was already in bed when Kyuhyun arrived home. He smiled and fixed himself by his side, hugging him firmly. “Sleep now, Hyuk,” he whispered, looking at Hyukjae’s soft features. Hyukjae wasn’t even looking at him, but he still closed his eyes and obeyed Kyuhyun’s order.

Kyuhyun sighed softly. He was frustrated because he couldn’t understand what was going on with Hyukjae’s mind, but having him in front of him, being able to hug him firmly to sleep, was already way more of what he had asked for. Kyuhyun had done everything the doctor said and although he knew it could take a life to see changes, he still was impatient.

He went to work and left Hyukjae alone, gave him security and a steady routine. But aside from Hyukjae walking out and throwing his flowers, nothing changed. “Please tell me how I can help you…,” he begged, tightening his hug and closing his eyes. “I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you Hyuk… I really am.”

“KYUHYUN! KYUHYUN!” Hyukjae screamed, reaching his hands towards Kyuhyun as he screamed and kicked the men uselessly.

“HYUKJAE!! HYUK! STOP! HYUKJAE! HYUKJAE! HELP! HYUKJAEEEEEEEEEEE!!”

Kyuhyun woke up abruptly and sweaty. His heart was pounding harshly against his chest. His hands were trembling and he had trouble breathing properly. He focused on what was in front of him. Hyukjae. And he closed his eyes again, trying to calm down. Is it real? He opened his eyes once more.

Was Hyukjae real? Was he really in front of him? Was he hugging his wife? Kyuhyun grabbed his phone blindly, not tearing his eyes away from Hyukjae. What if everything was a dream? He had had hallucinations before. What if Hyukjae being with him was just a game of his mind and all those weeks had been nothing but a beautiful dream?

He dialed a number, not looking away from the small man in his arms.

It kept ringing but no one answered so he had to dial again, and then once more. “Hello? Kyuhyun, it’s two in the morning, what is it about? I’m assisting a surgery.”

“Is it real?” Kyuhyun’s voice was hoarse, as if he was at the verge of crying. “Did we really find Hyukjae? Am I really hugging him?”

“Kyuhyun, what’s going on?” Siwon was getting worried about it.

“This isn’t a dream, right?” Kyuhyun’s tears started streaming slowly, reaching one of his hands to slowly trace Hyukjae’s features. “It’s Hyukjae the one I’m hugging… or is it a hallucination?”

There was a heavy sigh on the other line. “Kyu, it’s real. Hyukjae is right there. We’ve found him.”

“R-Really?” Kyuhyun’s voice was cracking. He was breaking down.

Siwon didn’t hesitate in answering. “Yes, it’s real.” He assured. “Hyukjae is right there. You’re touching him. He’s real. There’s nothing you have to worry about, Kyuhyun. Hyukjae is safe now.”

Kyuhyun broke down. He cried loudly, hugging Hyukjae firmly, waking the other up but not receiving any kind of rejection. He was frustrated. He was scared. He didn’t even know if he was only dreaming, if it was his mind, or if actually, everything was real. The fact that Hyukjae was back after so many months hadn’t really set in his mind up until that moment.

He kept himself awake until it was morning and he could only see how Hyukjae slept and woke up again, not paying attention to him at all. It’s enough that you’re here.

As soon as it was a decent hour, Kyuhyun stood up, smiling softly. “Come on Hyuk, let’s shower together,” he said gently, stretching his back before offering his hand for Hyukjae to take.

But Hyukjae didn’t. Although Hyukjae did what he was told, he still didn’t acknowledged Kyuhyun’s existence. It was as if the voice came out of nowhere and he wasn’t there at all. He could hear Kyuhyun, and he could understand what he was saying, but he decided not to hear it and shut down any kind of useless information.

Hyukjae stood up and walked to the bathroom, not waiting for Kyuhyun but just doing as he was told.

Kyuhyun ignored the heavy feeling in his chest and just decided to smile softly, walking as well towards the bathroom to shower together.

“You know Hyuk, today, I won’t go to work…,” Kyuhyun said after they finished, drying Hyukjae’s hair. “Let’s go out and walk around… or have lunch at the park, what do you think?”

The lack of answer was demotivating.

Kyuhyun took his sweet time to dress himself comfortably and dress Hyukjae as well. He was sure maybe skip the routine slightly could help Hyukjae a little more. Siwon was probably sleeping, so they would meet until afternoon. He had some plans already.

Maybe if Kyuhyun took Hyukjae to his father’s house something would come back to him. Or maybe if they spent time together would be enough. Whatever it could be, Kyuhyun would try them all.

“Do you want to dance, Hyukjae?” Kyuhyun asked as he served breakfast on the table. “We can dance together, you know? As we did before… Although you know I’m not that good at it,” he chuckled, finally sitting down. “Let’s just have fun by ourselves today.

The way Hyukjae just sat down and said nothing, was a proof that whatever Kyuhyun was doing, wasn’t helping at the moment.

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