I’ve always had this nightmare, a nightmare where we were at a dark hallway. Both of us were holding hand but there was a force pulling him away from me. But this nightmare was different. I was the one who let his hand go and made him fell into a sapphire blue ocean………

I took a cab to SM building early in the morning but I have to go through the back door. The fans crowded the entrance holding signboards which I never want to read. I showed my pass to the security and headed straight to Lee Soo Man’s office. He hasn’t arrived yet and nor has his secretary. I took a seat on the couch in front of his office and rested my head on the couch.

My head jerked up at the clicks of his secretary’s heels. I got up and slightly bowed at her.

“Violet-ssi? Please come in,” she said. I followed her into his room and took a seat. A moment later, the door open and Lee Soo Man entered. I stood up and bowed at him. He gave me an abrupt nod and sat down facing me. He let out a sigh as he leaned against the chair.

“Do you know why I called you here?” he asked straightening his posture.

“Yes,” I answered.

“I’m not here to ask you whether the rumor is true or not. Heechul ssi has told me everything.” He said and my eyes widened. Was he…joking?

“We have two options; one, we confirm the rumor and Heechul ssi’s career might get affected and two, we deny the rumor and you leave the company.” He said.

“When you said ‘leave the company’…you meant for me to leave Heechul right?” I asked and he slowly nodded.

“You’re one of my best makeup artist but Heechul is one of SM’s best artist…if you really love him, you’ll let him go.” He said.

“Have you ever thought what will happen to him once I left? If he will be heartbroken and abandoned his career?” I asked.

“I’ll never let that happen.” He shook his head.

“Artist can’t live without his fans. By the way his fans stood in front of the building, demanding the truth from last night…you should know what to do.” He said.

“Violet ssi?” he asked after two minutes of silence. I blinked away the tears and stood up.

“Thank you for letting me working here,” I said, my voice shaking. “Please promise me you would never let this thing affects Heechul ssi.” I said and bowed my head at him. “Annyeonghi gyeseyo, Lee Soo Man ssi.”

“Poor girl,” I barely heard him when I reached the door. I closed the door and made my way to the bathroom. I let out a faint laugh at my reflection and washed my face with the cold water. I didn’t want to think of anything, I’m afraid I’ll break down and change my mind. As long as he’s happy, I’ll be happy too. It’s the right decision.

“Judging by your face, I’m sure you’ve made the right decision.” Yoojin said. I glared at her through the mirror and laughed.

“Even if I leave, do you think you’ll get Heechul?” I asked.

“As long as you’re not with him, I’ll be fine.” She shrugged.

“Please don’t come back,” she said and walked out from the bathroom, laughing. I cursed her under my breath and washed my face and fixed my makeup. After that, I went to my office to take few of my things and my colleagues didn’t have to ask me to know why I’m packing my things. After bidding my farewell, I went to SNSD’s practice room and was attacked by a group hug.

“Yah, I’m not going to die.” I said forcing a laugh.

“What’s going to happen to you?” Taeyeon asked, concerned. I shook my head at her but smiled.

“Sica yah, I need to talk to you for a moment.” I said and she looked at Taeyeon, asking for permission. Taeyeon nodded at her and we went to an empty practice room.

“I have to resign.” I said at her in a low voice.

“Then, you’re going to leave Heechul oppa?” she asked with a frown on her face. Just by hearing his name, my heart shook begging me not to do what I’m going to do.

“Listen, I’m going to tell him that I’m going back to Canada for two months.” I said.

“But you’re not going there.” She said and I nodded.

“Your job is to tell him that I’m going to Canada and I’ll come back in two months if he asks. He knows that you’re the closest to me and he knows that I’ll tell you everything.” I said.

“Unnie, I can’t do this.” She said shaking her head.

“I can’t ask a Super Junior member to do this. I can only depend on you,” I pleaded.

“Tell me where you are going and when and for how long.” She said and I sighed.

“I’m going to Hong Kong this evening, and I’m not planning to come back.” I said.

“Please don’t change your number.” She said but I shook my head.

“I’ll contact you to know about…him.” I said. She hugged me tightly and whispered,

“This isn’t the right thing for you to do…” I pretended I didn’t hear that and looked at her.

“Promise me you’re not going to tell Ch-him.” I said, can’t manage to say his name.

“I promise.” She said with tears rolling down her cheeks.

“Please don’t cry, I’ll cry too.” I said wiping her tears. I have to be strong when I see him.

“Take care,” she said and I smiled.

“You too…”

I sighed when I walked out from the room. ‘It might be not the right thing for me to do…but it’s the right thing for me to do…for now.’

A pair of leather shoes came into my view and I slowly looked up. Heechul has his hands in his pocket and stared at me coldly. He walked toward me not letting his eyes off me and I can’t help but stepped back too.

“Are you okay?” I asked once my back pressed with the wall. He didn’t say anything but just kissed me. The kiss that was so gentle and calming that I have to pull away once I felt my heart telling my mind to step away from this decision.

“Are you?” he asked pressing his forehead against mine.

“I’m fine. Soo Man ssi told me to go back to Canada until the rumors stop.” I said softly looking at my heels.

“How long?” he asked.

“Two months…” I whispered.

“You’ll come back right?” he asked and pulled my chin up so that my eyes locked with his. I just smiled and hugged him inhaling his scent.

“I have to go or the fans will see me.” I said.

“They’re no longer there. SM has covered it up.” He said and I looked at him.

“Jinjja?”

“So you don’t have to worry.” He said and I smiled. I pecked him on the lips and walked away.

Whatever they said in the article will be true in a few hours…

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Sorry for the late update! I didn’t want to start the New Year with sad chapters T_T

Comment please! Comments really inspire me! =) Comment even if you hate me for not updating =P kekeke^^