(Two days later)

Hyunseung blinked tiredly, feeling exhausted even though he’d been sleeping for a long time. He knew that he was asleep for pretty long, but he didn’t realise exactly how long it’d been until he opened his eyes and looked at the digital clock on his bedside.

Two days?! I’ve been unconscious for TWO DAYS?

He looked to his left, and saw his father’s sleeping figure. “Appa,” he called out, voice raspy and throat dry. Hyunseung felt bad for waking his father up, but he needed to see Ilhoon. He needed to ascertain that his son was alive. His father groaned and blinked, his eyes widening when he saw that Hyunseung was awake. The man brought him into a tight hug which made Hyunseung wince. “Appa, don’t tear the stitches.”

“Oh, sorry. I’m just really glad to see that you’re awake, Hyunseung-ah.”

Hyunseung forced a smile and nodded. “It’s good to be awake, appa, but can you bring me to Ilhoon? Please, I need to see him,” he nearly pleaded. His father explained that the doctor had to give him the green light to leave the room while pouring a glass of water, which Hyunseung gladly took and gulped down. He then immediately pressed the call button and Mr. Jang could only shake his head with a small chuckle, slightly amused by how eager Hyunseung was. Ilhoon was fine, but he also understood how Hyunseung was feeling. Any normal parent would be worried about the well-being of his or her child.

After the doctor in charge of Hyunseung ran some tests and asked him whether he was feeling alright, he was allowed to visit the NICU, but only in a wheelchair. Once the doctor left, Hyunseung pestered his father to get a wheelchair and bring him to the NICU. Mr. Jang still couldn’t believe that his son, who still acted like a baby sometimes, already had a baby of his own.

Hyunseung got off the bed and onto the wheelchair with much difficulty, feeling his stitches stretch slightly and wincing each time they felt like they were going to tear. It really to have had a caesarean done, all because his mother couldn’t just keep away for another two months. After seeing Jungsu give birth, Hyunseung honestly wanted to give birth naturally too but no, his mother had to make his blood pressure shoot up.

“…did you tell umma anything?” Hyunseung asked hesitantly. She deserved to know that her grandson was born, but she also didn’t. After all, Ilhoon was half Junhyung and wouldn’t she hate that about him? If she was just going to hate his son, then Hyunseung would rather she don’t see him at all.

“We were waiting for you to wake up and make a decision. For now, she just thinks that you’re out of the country. She was pretty mad at being knocked out though,” Mr. Jang added. Hyunseung sighed, nodding in understanding. He needed to think about how to deal with his mother without affecting his son’s recovery and growth.

“Can I just… tell her that Junhyung left? That’s that. She probably just wanted to hear me confess it, anyway,” Hyunseung mumbled with a slight roll of his eyes. When Ilhoon grew up, Hyunseung was going to let him do whatever he wanted as long as it wasn’t illegal or life-threatening. He wasn’t ever going to let himself become like his mother.

“It’s your choice. We’re here,” Mr. Jang announced, stopping in front of the NICU ward where Ilhoon was. Hyunseung immediately snapped his head to the left, trying to find the name ‘Yong Ilhoon’. When he finally found it, his heart broke, seeing his baby boy hooked up to so many machines inside the incubator.

“We aren’t allowed inside, are we?” Hyunseung asked, choking back a sob. It was his fault that Ilhoon had to be in there. He should’ve been home. Hell, he should’ve moved out of the city for at least a few months. He had friends who stayed in Mokpo or Busan, and he could’ve asked to crash at their places. Instead, he stayed right where his mother knew he would be.

Mr. Jang shook his head. “Not when he’s still hooked up to so many machines. He still hasn’t opened his eyes, you know,” he informed. Hyunseung frowned, looking at his father questioningly. Ilhoon was premature, so wasn’t it normal for him not to have opened his eyes yet?

“Is that abnormal?” Hyunseung asked worriedly.

“It’s fine, but he should be opening his eyes at least once in the next couple days,” Mr. Jang said. Hyunseung heaved a sigh of relief, nodding in understanding. He could wait for Ilhoon to develop. Waiting wasn’t really an issue. He was fine as long as Ilhoon’s life wasn’t in any danger.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you, Ilhoon-ah,” Hyunseung mumbled, releasing another sigh and looking up at his father. He wanted to stay and watch over Ilhoon, but it hurt to see his two-day old son hooked up to so many machines. “Can we come back after dinner?”

Mr. Jang smiled warmly and nodded. “Of course we can. Now say goodbye to Ilhoon and we’ll get some food, alright?”

Looking back at the ward, Hyunseung said, “I’ll be back later, Ilhoon-ah. Let’s go, appa.”

----------------------------

Hyunseung and his father went to the hospital canteen to eat, since the former didn’t particularly like the food that patients were served. He remembered what they gave him the last time he was in here and shuddered.

They found a table and Hyunseung sat alone while waiting for his father to buy their food. He sighed, looking around and spotting patients from all walks of life. He doubted that any of them were in his position though. He was only twenty-five; why was life throwing so many obstacles at him? He didn’t doubt that he’d raise Ilhoon well, but it would be nice to have some support from both his parents.

Pulling his phone out, Hyunseung called Geurim to tell her that he was fine. As expected, she said that she’d be right over with Doojoon and Yoseob. She ended the call right after that, probably getting ready to leave the house or something. Hyunseung sighed again, fiddling with his phone and pouting because he really, really wished that Junhyung was here.

For one thing, he wouldn’t be bored out of his mind, and he wouldn’t have gone into premature labour in the first place. He thought back to Ilhoon hooked up to all those machines and felt his heart break slightly. His son didn’t deserve to suffer because his mother was a . It wasn’t right.

It’s not like I can do anything, Hyunseung thought, rather helplessly. He could only pray that Ilhoon would develop properly and grow up without any illnesses. He’d read before that preemies could possibly have developmental problems, and honestly it scared him to think that Ilhoon might be like that. He wouldn’t love him any less – Ilhoon was still his flesh and blood. But it would, without a doubt, be hard to raise him single-handedly.

“What’s got you thinking?” Mr. Jang asked, sitting down opposite of Hyunseung with two bowls of ramen. Hyunseung shook his head, forcing a smile and willing the negative thoughts away. Ilhoon is going to be just fine. I have to believe in him.

“It’s nothing. Let’s eat,” Hyunseung said, picking his chopsticks up and digging in. His father nodded, eyeing him weirdly but beginning to eat nonetheless. He could tell that Hyunseung was worried, but being worried wasn’t going to help the situation. It wasn’t as if Hyunseung could do much to help. All they could do now was hope that Ilhoon would be healthy.

They finished dinner quickly, and Hyunseung washed his hair before cleaning his body with a wet towel. There was no way he was going to risk reopening his wound. It was painful enough just moving around. He wasn’t going to get it stitched up a second time. He took his time despite wanting to get back to the NICU, knowing that he needed to take care of himself too. After about forty minutes, he got out of the toilet with his father’s help and changed into a fresh hospital gown.

“Geurim should be getting here soon,” Mr. Jang told his son. Hyunseung nodded, looking at the time and noting that it still wasn’t too late. He should be allowed to visit the NICU for at least a few minutes before visiting hours were over.

“Can we go to the NICU first, and she wait for us here?” Hyunseung asked hopefully, wanting to spend as much time with Ilhoon as possible before he would be chased away. Mr. Jang chuckled, already texting his daughter and getting the wheelchair to the bedside. He helped Hyunseung on and they were off to the NICU once more.

This time, there were a lot less people in the walkways. They got to the NICU faster than before, and Hyunseung peered inside to see if Ilhoon was moving around or doing anything in general. “Ilhoon, it’s your umma. I’m back, like I promised,” he whispered, knowing that Ilhoon wouldn’t be able to hear him anyway.

But then the most unexpected thing happened. Ilhoon opened his eyes, just a little, and it was almost like he looked at Hyunseung. The young mother could stare at his son's eyes forever, because they were so beautiful and reminded him of Junhyung so much. There was a flicker of recognition in Ilhoon's eyes, almost as if he knew who he was looking at. It was only for a brief second though, and in the next moment his gaze was wandering all over the place. Hyunseung panicked slightly, because it seemed as if Ilhoon didn’t have any control over his eyes.

“It’s normal, Seung-ah. Premature babies can’t really control their eyes well because they aren’t fully developed,” his father assured. Hyunseung heaved a sigh of relief, glad that there wasn’t anything wrong with his son. He felt tears prick at his eyes.

“He looked at me,” Hyunseung breathed out, unable to control his emotions.

Mr. Jang smiled, patting his son on the back.

“He knows you’re his umma.”

Nodding, Hyunseung bit his lower lip to prevent his tears from spilling over.

That’s right Ilhoon. I’m your umma, and I love you so much.

--------------------------

By the time Hyunseung and his father returned to his room, Geurim was there playing games on her phone. Looking around in confusion and seeing neither of his friends, Hyunseung asked, “Doojoon and Yoseob didn’t come with you?”

“Yoseob oppa was sleeping and Doojoon oppa didn’t want to disturb him or make him leave the house so late. He’s been having nightmares about going into premature labour like you,” she explained. Hyunseung furrowed his brows and looked up at his father.

“Isn’t it normal for twins to be born slightly early?” Hyunseung questioned.

“He’s just worried about his kids, like you about Ilhoon,” Mr. Jang reasoned. Hyunseung sighed, nodding and asking for some help to get back onto his bed. After he got into a comfortable position, he texted Doojoon and all his close friends, in general, that Ilhoon was recovering well.

Then, looking at his sister and father, he sighed again. He seemed to be doing a lot of sighing recently, he noted absentmindedly. “So I think we all know that we need to do something about umma and her recent… behaviour,” he started awkwardly. He couldn’t exactly call his mother crazy, after all. She might have been acting a little out of hand recently, but that didn’t give him the right to call her crazy because he was raised better than that.

“I didn’t go home yesterday. I just stayed here with you and I told her I was at Doojoon oppa’s place,” Geurim stated. “She wasn’t very happy that you were ‘out of town’, as we lied.”

“She’ll find out eventually,” Hyunseung pointed out. “Why don’t we just tell her the truth?”

“Hyunseung you just had an operation. You shouldn’t be putting yourself in that kind of position just yet,” Mr. Jang said disapprovingly, shooting Hyunseung’s suggestion down right away. The abovementioned male pouted, jutting his lower lip out childishly.

“Then what do you suggest?” he whined.

“We wait till you’re discharged and you confront her at home, with us there. Ilhoon will be safe in the hospital and you’ll be able to at least move around on your own,” he suggested.

Hyunseung looked at his sister, nodding in unison with her. “That’s a great idea, appa! But… how are you two going to deal with umma?” he asked, slightly worried because he wasn’t the one who had to face her at home. The two of them were definitely going to face her wrath for disappearing for so long every day, and going home so late.

“I’m legal, oppa. She doesn’t control my life anymore,” Geurim told him. “And appa’s been legal for forever. Just because she’s his wife doesn’t mean that she controls his life, too.” Hyunseung looked at his father and the elder nodded in agreement with his daughter.

“Geurim’s right. You don’t have to worry about us, son,” Mr. Jang assured.

Hyunseung grimaced at the thought of his mother ing at his father and sister, but sighed and gave in eventually. “You’re right. It’s getting late. You guys should head home,” he told them as he glanced at the digital clock.

The two nodded, making Hyunseung promise to take care of himself before they both left and Kyujong entered the room. Hyunseung was about to ask where Jungmin was, but Kyujong was already explaining that his boyfriend was staying at the NICU to watch over Ilhoon.

“Did he do that last night, too?” Hyunseung asked, already feeling bad because staying alone at the NICU every night didn’t really sound appealing. He would be fine because his son was there, but Jungmin didn’t really have to do so much for him.

Kyujong nodded nonchalantly, stretching and plopping down on the couch. “Ilhoon’s at a greater risk than you are, since he’s practically defenceless. If Jaewon even takes him out of the incubator, that’s it,” he said seriously. Hyunseung bit his lip, understanding why Kyujong and Jungmin were so worried. They’d grown attached over the past couple of months and Ilhoon had taken a liking to them, too. It’d be on their conscience forever, if they ever let anything happen to him.

“You’ve been through a lot these couple days. Get some sleep, and I’ll wake you if anything comes up,” Kyujong told him, giving him a reassuring smile. Hyunseung nodded, trying to get into a comfortable position where his wound didn’t hurt, and shut his eyes before drifting off into sleep.

He dreamt of Junhyung that night. The two of them were together with Ilhoon, playing in the park.

They were a happy, complete family.

I wish you were here, Junnie.

Andddd new update! It still took me more than two weeks (sorry) but Hyunseung and Ilhoon are fine~

So Hyunseung's mum still doesn't know that she made her son go into premature labour, and Ilhoon opened his eyes and looked at Hyunseung for the first time! (explains the title, no?)

I wanted to fit Junhyung in but it didn't make sense for people to visit him at like midnight, in prison. So he isn't mentioned here but he'll be making his reappearance next chapter! Like finally man he's been gone for like seven chapters ><

That's all from me for now. I still haven't figured out what the next chapter's gonna be like but it'll probably be another timeskip. I have something planned already but hopefully it flows well lol

Ok I'll be going now. See you next time! Annyeong! ^^