(A week later)

For the past week, Hyunseung hadn’t had much of an appetite. True to his word, he did try to eat for Ilhoon’s sake, but he just couldn’t keep any food down. After eating just a couple of mouthfuls of food, he’d run to the toilet and throw it all back up. Nobody actually understood why that was happening, but they figured that it was a psychological thing. That being said, Howon had actually suggested bringing Hyunseung to a psychologist, but Hyunseung had shut himself out completely and they had to give up on the plan.

It’d been a full week since Junhyung left. Doojoon and Yoseob had tried their best to make sure that Hyunseung was fine. According to Geurim, there were also seven other people who took turns to visit Hyunseung. She knew, of course, that Junhyung had asked for their help. But to Doojoon and Yoseob, it didn’t seem very suspicious.

For the most part, Sungjong visited the most, followed by Howon and Dongwoo. Geurim did too, but she often had to leave early in order not to raise her parents’ suspicion. After all, it wouldn’t do any good for Mrs. Jang to suddenly turn up at Hyunseung’s apartment, ranting on about how she always thought of Junhyung as a bad egg. That would only cause Hyunseung unnecessary stress.

At the moment, Yoseob and Doojoon were having their lunch with Hyunseung before they went to work. Yoseob was already done eating and had gone to the master bedroom to take a nap. Hyunseung had moved out of his and Junhyung’s apartment, back to the apartment he once shared with Doojoon. It had become too much for him to live in that house, not with all the memories of what used to be.

Doojoon sighed as he looked at his best friend and the almost untouched plate of food in front of him. Hyunseung was blanking out, constantly staring at the door as if he was expecting someone other than Sungjong or Geurim to enter. Doojoon knew who Hyunseung was hoping to see, of course, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt him to see his best friend like this.

“Seung, come on. You have to eat at least something, don’t you? Aren’t you hungry?” Doojoon asked, worry evident in his tone. He’d been watching Hyunseung pick at his food listlessly for over ten minutes now. It was as if Hyunseung’s soul had left with Junhyung a week ago. He hardly spoke anymore, not unless he was asked a question. Even then, he still might not reply.

Hyunseung stared blankly at the bowl of rice, shaking his head and looking at Doojoon. Sighing once more, Doojoon could only nod in understanding. He knew as well as Hyunseung that the food wouldn’t stay down. Hyunseung had already tried his best to stomach at least something, but none of it ever stayed down.

“We’re going to leave soon. It’s Heechul hyung’s birthday today. Do you want me to wish him happy birthday on your behalf?” Doojoon asked, already getting up and putting the bowl of rice aside. Hyunseung simply nodded, not even bothering to fake a smile because that was pointless. In his opinion, it was good enough that he wasn’t still crying all the time, although he still did cry himself to sleep daily. “We’ll leave when Sunggyu gets here then. Is it alright if we take the car?”

One of the things that shocked Doojoon was the fact that he found the set of car keys in his mailbox the day after Junhyung left. He hadn’t known what the keys were for, but when he showed them to Hyunseung, the latter burst into tears and said that he would recognise those keys anywhere. There was also a letter from Junhyung, saying that the car was Doojoon’s now. Nonetheless, Doojoon still felt the need to ask Hyunseung for permission to use the car. He didn’t feel that it was right for him to use the car whenever he wanted, simply because Junhyung gave him the keys.

Hyunseung nodded, standing up and heading to the guest room.

It seemed like so long ago that he and Junhyung were talking about buying a car.

Hyunseung wondered if Junhyung had already planned to give the car to Doojoon.

Knowing Junnie, he probably did.

It wasn’t long before the waterworks opened once more.

--------------------------

By the time Sunggyu arrived, Hyunseung had already managed to cry himself to sleep again. Doojoon let the elder into the house, thanking him for coming over, and left with Yoseob to go to work. Sunggyu sat on the couch, looking towards the master bedroom and wondering if Hyunseung was going to be fine. He’d only visited one other time, and that had been with Sungjong. Sunggyu didn’t know if he would be able to handle Hyunseung if anything were to happen.

However, not too long later, Geurim arrived with an envelope in hand. She greeted Sunggyu and explained that the envelope had arrived in the mail just a day ago. It was from Junhyung, surprisingly, and it was addressed to Hyunseung. Geurim hadn’t opened it, because that wasn’t respectful to Hyunseung. Sunggyu told her that he was sleeping, and she only sighed while looking at the closed bedroom door.

Geurim was getting really, really worried about Hyunseung. It had been a week and if he was going to continue starving himself, Geurim might have to call an ambulance and admit him into the hospital, just for Ilhoon’s sake. Junhyung had asked her to take care of both Hyunseung and Ilhoon, and there wasn’t any way that she was going to lose her nephew anytime soon.

“How long has he been in there?”

Sunggyu shrugged, having arrived just a half hour ago. “Less than an hour.”

With that, the conversation ended and the two sat in silence once more. It was only when Hyunseung woke up and went to grab a glass of water did Geurim hand the envelope to him, telling him that it was from Junhyung and that he should probably watch it. She left right after that, trusting her brother to Sunggyu.

After she left, Hyunseung and Sunggyu sat in silence. Hyunseung flipped the envelope over, making sure that it was from Junhyung. He’d recognise his boyfriend’s handwriting anywhere, after all. When he saw his name, written neatly across the front of the envelope, it took all his willpower not to break down again.

Sunggyu looked over at his ex-colleague and friend, wondering what Hyunseung ever did to deserve such pain. He understood that Junhyung had no choice, but why did Hyunseung have to suffer for it? Life was just so unfair sometimes. Everyone deserved their happy ending, didn’t they?

“Should I open it?” Hyunseung asked, his voice barely audible. Sunggyu nodded almost immediately, knowing that it had to be something important. Junhyung never did anything without a reason.

With shaky hands, Hyunseung tore the envelope open and pulled a disc out. On it were the words ‘I Like You the Best’. While Sunggyu was just confused, not understanding what that meant, tears started streaming down Hyunseung’s cheeks again. He’d seen those words before, just a couple weeks ago. It’d been the file name for the song that Junhyung had been composing.

It was for me. This song was for me. How long ago had he been planning to leave?

“Do you want to play it?” Sunggyu questioned, looking down at the disc. To be honest, he was quite curious about its contents. But looking at Hyunseung crying, he wasn’t sure if the younger wanted to find out what was in the disc.

Surprisingly, though, Hyunseung got up and went over to the CD player, putting the disc in and pressing play. The first lines of the song were by Junhyung, causing Hyunseung to cry even harder than he already was. Sunggyu could only sit there, listening to the lyrics because he had no idea how he was supposed to make Hyunseung stop crying.

On the other hand, Hyunseung simply curled up and continued to cry. He knew the song, knew its lyrics, and now knew that it was dedicated to him despite the lyrics being about a girl. He knew why Junhyung sent this to him after leaving. He wanted to assure Hyunseung that he’d always love him, whether or not they could be together with each other.

And it hurt.

But this time, he was hurting for Junhyung. How hard had it been for him to bear this burden alone? Hyunseung hadn’t put much thought into it, but now, he realised that it must’ve been really hard on Junhyung to keep this a secret, plan all this for Hyunseung without the elder finding out.

Hyunseung could only imagine the pain Junhyung was put through.

--------------------------

After nearly an hour of replaying the same song, Hyunseung still hadn’t stopped crying. Sunggyu didn’t know how much a person could cry, but this definitely wasn’t healthy. He’d suggested lunch, even though he knew that Hyunseung probably would throw it all back up. At least that was better than watching him cry for forty over minutes over a song.

“Hyunseung-ah, this isn’t good for you,” Sunggyu sighed.

Hyunseung shook his head, ignoring Sunggyu’s words completely. The elder could only look at his friend sadly, not knowing how to help him. He did put himself in Hyunseung’s shoes, which was why he didn’t feel that he had the right to say anything. If he was Hyunseung, he would be in pretty much the same situation.

However, he also had put himself in Junhyung’s shoes. That was why he completely understood Junhyung’s rationale in doing this. The problem was that Sunggyu couldn’t tell Hyunseung that he knew the truth. What if that made Hyunseung resent him, and all the others who Junhyung had looked up?

“I’m going back to my room,” Hyunseung whispered suddenly, getting up and locking himself in. Sunggyu sighed, staring at the closed door and wondering exactly how long it would be before Hyunseung would finally be back to his old self.

In the room, Hyunseung lay down on his bed and continued to cry. He picked up the cyclamen from a week ago, now withered, and threw it to the corner of the room. He couldn’t help but think that Junhyung was stupid, so, so stupid. He knew the younger had to do this; he understood, really. That didn’t mean that Junhyung had the right to hide his plans from him. It wasn’t fair to either of them.

At the moment, Hyunseung couldn’t help but wonder how things would’ve turned out had Junhyung come clean with him earlier. He probably would have left either way, but Hyunseung would’ve treasured their time together more. Also, Hyunseung’s heartbreak might have been lessened, if he at least knew where Junhyung was.

It really hurt when he woke up to an empty bed, and it hurt even more to find the note and cyclamen. After all, Junhyung had promised. He promised never to give a cyclamen to Hyunseung. The more Hyunseung thought about it, the more it hurt. He never thought it was possible to experience so much emotional pain.

And physical pain, too.

Wait a minute, physical pain?

It was only then that Hyunseung realised that he really was experiencing physical pain. A lot of it, too. And of all places, it was his abdomen that hurt. Immediately, Hyunseung began to panic. He wanted to get up, to check if his suspicions were true. But it really hurt, and it was all Hyunseung could do to prevent himself from crying out in pain.

When Hyunseung felt something warm against his thigh, his panic increased. “Sunggyu hyung! Oh my god, this can’t be happening. I can’t lose Ilhoon too,” he cried, his heart breaking into pieces at the thought of losing his baby boy, too. It was hard enough to lose Junhyung; Hyunseung couldn’t lose the only reminder he had of his boyfriend. “Sunggyu hyung, help me!”

“What’s going on? Can you open the door for me?”

“No,” Hyunseung whimpered. “It hurts, Sunggyu hyung.”

“Ok, I’ll be back as soon as I can,” Sunggyu assured, racing out of the house to find Kyujong and Jungmin. They picked the lock for him quickly, knowing that they were probably racing against time. All three of them were shocked to see blood, and were rooted in their places until Hyunseung let out another whimper.

“I can’t lose Ilhoon,” he cried. “I can’t.”

Jungmin was already carrying Hyunseung bridal style and going down to the car. Kyujong was right behind him, instructing Sunggyu to call Doojoon and Geurim and tell them the situation. Nodding, Sunggyu told him to hurry and get Hyunseung to the hospital.

It wasn’t even three minutes later that Kyujong and Jungmin were speeding to the hospital. Hyunseung lay curled up, and whimpering and crying constantly. He didn’t know what was happening but it couldn’t be any good. It was too early, way too early for Ilhoon to be born. Hyunseung didn’t know what he would do if he lost Ilhoon, too.

Please, don’t take my baby away from me too. Please.

That was the last thought that crossed Hyunseung’s mind before he passed out.

Omg I'm such a terrible author TT It took me almost three weeks and I only got this much out D:

Ok, so I was wrong about having more time when school starts. I still don't have time ><

Sorry for making you guys wait longer than I promised! I'll try my best to update faster! TT

I hope you guys enjoyed this, and please don't cry so much :/ I feel bad knowing that some of you are probably crying...

I'll update asap, and see you guys next time then! Annyeong~! ^^