I really don't get what you said that day. But now, those are all clear to me.

"Ah right. My tutor wants you to go with us on her wedding in two days. Can you go with us?" I said calmly, trying to lift the awkwardness between us.

"Huh?" He looked at me. Surprised, I think.

"You heard me. Can you go with us?" I asked him looking at him.

"Oh ok." He nodded.

"is there anything you want to say?" I asked him trying to sound like everything's alright.

"About last night."

"Hmm. Ok." I said signaling him to continue.

"Sorry about last night. I never meant to do that to you. I was just out of control." He looked at me.

"Ah. ok." I sounded cold but I don't want it. I don't want to sound like this but I can't stop it.

"Heeseol. Are you angry at me?" He looked down.

"No." He lifted his head up and looked at me with a surprised facade.

"No, I'm not angry. I liked it too. So don't worry. If only I stopped you, then there wouldn't have been something like that last night. You can forget it if you want, it's nothing. I think." I said it with a low voice, And I just whispered the last two words. "If you don't have anything else to say, then ok. I have things to do." I looked down and stepped back to close my door but he got a hold of my door and prevented it from closing.

"What?" I asked him with a calm voice. I'm trying to be calm and everything. The truth is, it's really something to me. That was my first kiss. And he just stole it just like that. I wished it was someone dear to me. Someone I love. Someone.

"It's not like that." He said sternly. "It's not nothing Lee Heeseol." He looked at me with a serious face.

"What?" I asked him totally confused about everything, about his words. I hope I can read his mind and unveil his thoughts without him muttering any words.

"It's not nothing for me. And if for you it's nothing then I can't do anything." He held the side of my arms. I tried to wriggle away from him, and he lets me go.

"I don't get you." I said in a whisper, I know he heard me.

"Ok, just do whatever you need to do. I'll just talk to you some other time. If you weren't busy anymore." He looked down and stepped back. He turned back and walked towards his door.

"Oppa." I don't know but I just wanted to call him that. He looked back at me "Hmm?"

Shizz. Heeseol why did you call him. I gulped and think as fast as possible what excuse should I say for calling him. Ah right, study.

"Ah, can I request?" I muttered. I hope you'll say anything.

"What is it?" He looked at me.

"You're attending a university already, right?" He nodded.

"Can you help me study? For my exams?" I looked down at my feet, embarrassed about everything. Ugh. Pabo Lee Heeseol, why? Aren't you thinking? Be smart.

"Ok." He just said and nodded. I opened my door and motioned him to go in. He went inside and I closed my door.

"Ah. there they are." I pointed on my books on top of my study table and I walked towards my bed and pulled the small table I'm using every time I don't feel like using my study table. I put it in the middle of the carpet on my bedroom. I looked at him and he was watching me intently.

"Can you get my books? I'll get some juice downstairs." I said. And he nodded. I walked towards my door and I remembered to ask him what he wants.

"What do you want to drink?" I asked him.

"Anything would be ok." He said and I just nodded.

When I got some juice, I went upstairs and inside my room. I saw him reading my books and notes.

"My exams will be in six days. I don't have much time left so I hope you can help me with everything before it." It's the only thing possible for us to get lighter with each other. It won't be easy for us to live for the next days if e keep ignoring each other just because we kissed. I know I didn't thought of it lately but as I think about it more, there are the advantages too, even if it was only a impulsive request I asked him. Maybe in this way, I could know him more and accept the fact that he is my first kiss, that the person I shared my first kiss with is someone who has a heart. Not that I'm asking for him to like me, but someone with a soft heart. I want to know him better because I know, I'm starting to like him.

We started with the lessons.

It's really awkward. When I started to ask him about things, I can't look at him. And vice versa. There are even times when I just caught him looking at me. I feel his eyes boring a whole on me. And it's not comfortable. I tried to be, but yeah, a little, I think.

I had to say that he impressed me with the things he know. He can explain things well. But I noticed he is stuttering at times.

"Oppa." I called him out with a little voice.

He lift up his head. "Hmm?"

"Earlier, I don't really get it, what do you mean with those words?" I asked him, remembering  the things he said when he knocked on my door.

"Ah, that..I just wanted to.."

But before he could continue,  we heard someone knock the door and then it opened. It's mother.

"Oh, you're here too Sunggyu-ah. Let's eat. It's lunchtime already." Mother told us and smiled and went downstairs.

"Let's just talk about that some other time, ok? Let's go now." I stood up and walked. He nodded and followed and we went downstairs.

I saw mother and father are sitting there already. They motioned us to sit and have our lunch.

"I see you're tutoring Heeseol, hm Sunggyu?" Mother asked Sunggyu who was eating quietly. i looked at mother and she is smiling.

"Yes, Mrs. Lee." He said as he looked at him briefly.

"I asked him to teach me." I said and continued eating.

"I thought you don't want a tutor anymore aside from Youngjoo?" Father muttered.

"Uhm, it's because I thought he was bored, that's why I asked him instead." I said."Right, Oppa?" I looked at him and he looked up at me.

"Ah y-yes" He said and nodded.

"Oh, ok. Uhm, Sunggyu. Do you know, Heeseol is a little bit stubborn sometimes. She is lazy sometimes, but she studies well." father said and chuckled.

"Appa! Why do you have to say that!" I said and pouted at him.

All of them laughed even Sunggyu.

"Why? It's all true. Sunggyu, Heeseol got the highest mark when she was in high school, but she is really lazy when it comes to studying. I don't know how she does it but all I know is she is smart. Be patient with her, ok? It's only five days. Can you do that for me?" Father looked at him. And Sunggyu nodded. "Yes, Mr. Lee."

"Heeseol, have you told Sunggyu about Youngjoo's wedding?" Mother looked at me.

"Yes mother." I said as I reached my glass of water.

"Her tutor, Youngjoo is getting married the day after tomorrow. I hope you met her already. She said that you are invited on her wedding too. And you are our guest, we can't leave you here behind. You are our responsibility, and you are like our son now." She smiled to Sunggyu. "Since you are here for a vacation, I wonder if you brought with you one of your formal suits."

"Ah, the truth is, my mother didn't put any of those on my luggage. And I also told her not to." He smiled. Hmm. His eyes are so cute. They are so small. I wonder if he ever see anything. But they are so cute though.

"Well then. Let's buy your clothes. And you too Heeseol, buy a  new dress, ok?"

"Yes mother."

"Heeseol, go to the mall after lunch, ok? Accompany Sunggyu too, ok? We still need to fix something here with your father. And maybe we'll just go there after." Mother said. I just nodded and looked at Sunggyu who was chewing his food carefully.