--

“Thank you for your hard work!”

A girl bowed to whoever inside the room before she closed the door. Nako sighed and lifted her head up, smiling as she was heading out of the company. Today was her last day as an idol in Japan after she announced her graduation from her group. She was not sure about what she was going to do next, but she was sure about one thing.

She’s going home.

Nako snapped from her thoughts when someone called her name.

“Nako senpai!”

Nako turned her head to find her junior, Kamijima Kaede, running toward her. Nako grinned as Kaede pants once she was in front of Nako.

“Uh, I heard from Miku senpai that you’re going back to Korea. Is that true?”

Nako chuckled and nodded.

“Yeah, but don’t worry. I can go back here if you all need me.”

Nako smiled wider when she saw Kaede staring at her with misty eyes.

“Aww come on, Kaede-chan. I’ll be around if you need anything. So work hard, our ace!”

That being said makes Kaede cry harder. Nako sighed as she smiled before she pulled Kaede into her embrace, letting her junior cry.

…

“Hiichan, you know you can stay longer in Korea if you want right?”

Hitomi turned her head as she finished tying her shoes to her member/friend, Ayane. Hitomi stood up and smiled, before her other friend, Yui, came closer.

“Yeah, Hiichan. Don’t worry about the concert. You can just focus on your family.”

Hitomi stares at her friends with a soft smile.

“Ah, I wish I could stay too. But my family insists that I need to do the concert.”

Ayane and Yui look at each other before they sigh and drag Hitomi to sit on the nearest bench in their practice room.

“You can always come back here, Hiichan. We’ll take care of the group and your spot. It’s been awhile since you’re back home, so take a rest.”

Ayane nodded at Yui’s words.

“She’s right. Moreover, your sister has graduated isn’t she? She must have wanted to spend more time with her family.”

At the mention of her sister, Hitomi grinned.

“True, that will be nice isn’t it.”

Hitomi released a long sigh before she stood up and turned her body to her friends. She grinned.

“But my sister is as stubborn as our mama. She won’t like it if I take a rest just for her sake.”

Hitomi felt a vibration from her pocket. Her smile went wider when she stared at the caller ID.

“Don’t worry, I’ll think of reasons to stay longer. I’ll ask our manager to stream the concert, so be sure to give your all out okay?!”

--

“Aand…. Yes! New time, Miyawaki! Good job!”

Yujin panted as she rested her hand on her knees. She felt her back being slapped by her coach because of the new record.

“Keep it up and we’ll be ready for nationals!”

Yujin wiped the sweat on her neck before grinning.

“Alright! I’ll bring you to nationals, coach!!”

The coach, Choi Sooyoung, laughed heartily. She ruffled Yujin’s hair fondly.

“Yes, kid. I’ll keep your words. Now go, take a bre- Yah! Miyawaki!”

Yujin was already running to the start line. She waved her hands to her coach.

“Coach Choi!! Get ready to record my time!!!”

Sooyoung shakes her head, but then readying herself to watch Yujin run for the tenth time. From behind, a girl seemed to be shaking her head while she watched Yujin run to the finish line.

“Ah, you’re too soft to that big dog, coach.”

Coach Choi turned her head and smiled at the sight of Jiheon, Yujin’s best friend. Coach Choi pulled her ex-trainees into her embrace and playfully headlocking her.

“Arghh! Get off of me!!”

Both women could hear Yujin’s laugh.

“Coaaach, you didn’t record my time!”

Yujin pouted at her coach. Before Coach Choi could open , Jiheon was already making her way to Yujin, twisting her ears.

“Yah, yah!! Baek Jiheon!!”

Jiheon grunted before she let go of Yujin’s ear.

“What are you doing in here instead of packing?”

Yujin blinked her eyes before she dashed out of the arena, leaving her grumpy bestfriend and dumbfounded coach.

“What did she forget this time?”

Jiheon sighed and watched Yujin’s back.

“She almost forgot to pick up her sister.”

--

Wonyoung released a sigh as she put her last pair of clothes inside her bag. This is her first holiday after being a freshman and she was nervous. Yes, nervous. She talked a lot to her mommy through phone, also with her sisters when they were free. As someone who had famous sisters, it was quite overwhelming for her.

Wonyoung still remembers how she became a center of attraction when she made a speech on orientation day. Unlike her older sisters, Wonyoung has grown taller than everyone expected. She even surpassed Yujin, who was the tallest among them all until Wonyoung reached senior year in middle school.

She became a center of attraction and got herself a title as Campus Goddess, people said she was the first after so many years (Turns out, it was her mama and Minju unnie who held that title before her). It got worse when Yujin visited her once at school to have lunch together. From there, they all know she was the younger sister of the idol Nako and Hitomi, and national runner Yujin.

No one let her be after those revelations.

Wonyoung locked her suitcase, making sure everything was packed for her semester break. She just really wants to go home to be with her family. Imagining the food that her mom prepared makes watered.

Wonyoung just couldn’t wait to go home.

“Wonnie?”

Wonyoung turned her head as she heard Yujin’s voice from the door. She rolled her eyes and walked over her sister.

“Can’t you knock? What if I’m changing, dummy.”

Yujin just grinned as she walked over her sister’s suitcase in the middle of the room.

“Is that it?”

Wonyoung, who was on her way to her bed, nodded her head. As Yujin is about to take her sister’s suitcase, her gaze falls onto the photo frame on Wonyoung’s desk. Even from afar, she knew who was in the picture, that probably each and every one of them had one of that kind of picture close to them.

A couple shot with their mama.

“You’re not gonna take that with you?”

Wonyoung looked over her shoulder, as Yujin pointed at the photo frame on her desk. She shakes her head.

“I have plenty at home.”

Yujin chuckled.

“Right, you’re mama’s favorite.”

Wonyoung smacked her sister’s back for teasing her.

“And you were the one who copied her, a lot.”

Yujin grinned. She looks around the room.

“Ready to go home?”

Wonyoung took a deep breath before she nodded.

“Wait, not home. Airport first.”

--

“Whoa.. I hope they are not here for them.”

Wonyoung and Yujin look at the seas of people in front of them waiting for the arrivals with cameras ready. There are even some people who brought mini stools so they could take pictures better. Not to mention the enormous lens they’ve got. Wonyoung shivers at the sight.

“I thought they were back without no one knowing?!”

Yujin immediately fished out her phone and scrolled through the browser. She stopped scrolling when she read something from Japanese news. Yujin shoved her phone to her younger sister.

“They must be here for Nako unnie. Today was her last day as an idol.”

Wonyoung read the news carefully before she gave her sister’s phone back.

“How are we supposed to let them know we’re-”

“Yujin-san! Wonyoung-san!”

Both giants turned their head simultaneously when they heard their name. A man in his 30s running toward them in a hurry. Looks familiar, but both Yujin and Wonyoung couldn’t recall who this man is. Out of habit, Yujin immediately moves Wonyoung into her back. Remembering her mama used to say that she needed to protect Wonyoung. Both of them watched the man panting as he rested his hands on his knees. He took a breath before smiling at both of them.

“Long time no see! I’m your sister’s manager, Tanaka. Nako-san requested me to inform you that they are going to use different gates. Follow me, they have arrived ten minutes ago.”

Both Yujin and Wonyoung look at each other before they stare at the crowds. Don’t wanting to make their sister wait for long, they decided to follow Tanaka cautiously. After some time walking to the much quieter place, they could see familiar figures sitting in one of the seats. Wonyoung was the first to run to her sisters.

“Unnie!!”

Both Nako and Hitomi got startled, as they saw a humongous figure about to jump at them when they saw a glimpse of Yujin behind. Their youngest sister has become taller, too tall for their liking.

“Wonnie?! How in the world you’re this tall- Yah, Yujin! You said she won’t grow taller!!”

Yujin laughed while holding her stomach as she watched Nako and Hitomi being hugged by their giant youngest sister.

“Mom has been complaining the same thing too. And where’s my hug?!”

Hitomi, always the nicest one, spread her other arm so Yujin could be in the group hug. Four of them just enjoyed each other’s warmth and smell. A little place that was only for them, a home. Back then, group hugs consisted of them and their mom being engulfed by their mama. Their mama always makes sure that everyone fits enough to be in her arms, and always said this is her way to recharge. However, this little hug with only four of them started when they met each other again, once they were back in Japan.

The time where they got the news of the airplane crashed.

Wonyoung was only four when she woke up in Anna’s arms, her mama’s best friend. Anna was crying, but she tried her best to hold Wonyoung in her arms securely. Yujin was there, sitting beside Anna with her hand holding into Wonyoung’s as they watched their mom crying on the phone. Next thing they know, they have arrived in Japan and are welcomed by their aunt, Rino, who immediately hold their mom securely into her embrace. Her eyes were swollen, as she stared at Yujin and Wonyoung with a small pained smile on her face. At that time, no one tells them what’s going on.

The group hugs initiated by Nako, once she sees her younger sisters arrive at Miyawaki residence. She immediately pulled Yujin and Wonyoung into her embrace, and cried on their shoulders. Hitomi, who was following behind, also hugged her sisters.

That’s when they know their lives won’t be the same.

That’s when they know they won’t see their mama forever.

Yujin was the first to pull out from the group hugs as she feels the need of oxygen. She watched her sisters asking Wonyoung questions, as this is their first time meeting after a year. Nako couldn’t even attend Wonyoung’s graduation due to her busy schedules. But this little reunion could wait until later. Now they had to go.

“Unnie, let’s go home.”

--

Eunbi took one last spoon of the jjigae that she made for her kids. Once the taste is fit to her taste bud, she turns off the stove and leaves it. She looked at the food on the table, making sure she made everything perfectly to welcome her daughters back. She took a glance at the clock, noting that she still had time to finally take a rest. She’s been in the kitchen the whole morning, in order to make perfect and heartful dishes to welcome them home.

Eunbi took her apron off and walked over the sofa. She used to think how this big house was too cramped, but now her daughters are living on their own, it feels too big and too quiet. She recalls the first time they bought the house. It was just three of them back then, but she remembered her younger wife said, ‘I’ll make sure we fill the house with laughs and joys, and maybe a couple of kids?’ Eunbi chuckled at the memory.

Sixteen years has passed since that eventful night, where she lost her one and only, where her kids lost their pillar of stability, where the family lost their head. It was hard, really hard for Eunbi to finally accept Sakura’s death. She oftenly refused to sleep in their bedroom, waking up crying, forgetting to cook meals for her childrens. She was a mess.

But she knew she had to move on. She gathered her kids and told them that she was sorry and how much she missed their mama, and they understand. They started to sleep with her at night, it was Nako’s idea. Hitomi, who was a morning person like Sakura, always made sure to give her a kiss in the morning. Yujin always gives her random hugs and cuddles, pulling her head into her laps as she said ‘Ma, you can rest in my laps. It’s probably smaller than ma, but it’s comfy.’. Wonyoung was the one who spent a lot of time with her, making sure her mommy was not alone.

Without her kids' help, Eunbi wasn’t sure if she could make it this far. It was hard, especially when her kids were growing up.

The time where Nako asked for permission to go to Japan to be an idol, as this was her mama’s last wish for her, to pursue her dream. And then Hitomi wishes to follow her sister’s steps. With her two older kids being away in Japan, Eunbi did have thought to bring her family to Japan. She was considering that until she remembered how Sakura told her to ask about her kids' opinion back when she got cast in New York. And after discussing it with Yujin and Wonyoung, it was Yujin’s idea to stay in Korea. ‘I don’t want to leave the house.’ she said. But Eunbi knows it wasn’t it. She heard Yujin talking before she slept, she said she was telling her mama about her day and said she’ll protect the house that her mama has built for her family.

Eunbi never had any thought to move ever since.

Eunbi smiles at the family pictures of them that were taken on their anniversary before she left for New York. Who knows that was the last family picture they had. And she was grateful for Sakura to ask Minju to have this photoshoot. She traced her finger on Sakura’s face. Eunbi was the only one who grew older.

“I miss you so much.”

Eunbi shook her head before she took a deep breath and smiled at the picture, as if she was teasing Sakura.

“I know, no crying before the kids arrived. Geez, you’re a worry wrath.”

Eunbi took a seat on the sofa before she rested her head there. She took a couple shot of her and Sakura before she closed her eyes, as she was feeling a little bit tired after cooking.

…

….

“Eun?”

Eunbi blinked her eyes slowly as she tried to adjust her sleepy eyes to the unexpected light surrounding her. Has she slept for some time? Did her kids arrive already? Eunbi started to lift her body, but then got confused.

She doesn’t remember sleeping in the park.

As she was about to look around, confirming her surroundings, she could feel someone sitting beside her. She thought it was one of her kids, Eunbi found herself choked up as she turned her head and saw her wife, looked exactly like before she left them to New York.

“Hi princess.”

With a trembling hand, Eunbi brings her hand to Sakura’s cheek. She bit her lips when her hand made contact with Sakura’s cheek.

She felt real.

“I am real, honey.”

Now it’s Sakura’s time to bring her hand up to Eunbi’s cheek. Eunbi immediately leaned her head over the hand, hoping to find the warmth that she missed the most. But then, her eyes widened and she pulled away from Sakura, surprising her supposed to be dead wife.

“Eun-”

Eunbi throws punches, tons of them without mercy, to Sakura. She couldn’t hold her frustrations over the years any longer as her grief poured out as uncontrollable tears. Sakura could only watch her wife throwing punches with gut-wrenching sobs that could tore her dead heart.

“Six..teen…years!!!”

Eunbi covered her face with shaking hands, as she finished making Sakura as her punching bag. Her lips trembled, moving away from Sakura as she knew her wife might be going to wipe her tears away.

“You left me... us!!! You said we’re growing old together!! Look at me, Kkura! Look at me!!! I’m the one who’s growing old! Alone!! How could you leave us just like that! How could you!!! Wonnie was barely four, Nako and Hiichan in Japan by themselves! You promised Yujin to go hiking, you promised me! Me!! Your wife!! That you won’t leave me alone!!”

A whimper escaped her lips as she fell to her knees, crying out. Her vision was blurry, her shoulders dropped in resignation. As more tears came, she could feel more thoughts swirled through her head. As a great tremor overtook her and her hands covering , Eunbi looked up, straight at Sakura who was hopelessly staring down at her.

“I was scared, Kkura. I am scared. I’m… not strong enough..”

Sakura finally falls down on her knees in front of Eunbi, and pulls her into her embrace. Eunbi couldn’t help but clutch her hands to her wife, as if her life depended on it. Instead of wiping her tears with her hand, Sakura kissed those tears away before she trailed kisses from her cheek to her ear.

“I’m sorry.”

Eunbi felt her body heat cooling down at the sound of her wife. She could feel her body calmed down. It felt like her energy, that has left her body the moment she knew her wife leaves her, comes back. For the first time after sixteen years, she feels alive more than ever.

“I… don’t want to leave you and kids, especially unannounced like that. Please believe me when I said I was there, always. When Nako keeping you company at night and when she decided to go to Japan, when Hiichan gives you kisses in the morning and ask your permission to follow Nako, when Yuding said she’s gonna protect the house and go hiking with Yena, when Wonnie cuddles with you and when she finally lose her first teeth, I was there. When you were lonely, when you cried yourself to sleep, when you woke up crying, I was there. Nothing devastates me more than watching all of you struggling because I left so sudden. But I was there, I’m always there, honey.”

Sakura pulled away and held her face towards her. Eunbi could see tears stream down her face as they both stared at each other. The intensity, the love, Eunbi could see it all in her eyes. Sakura was always the one who had expressive eyes.

“Thank you for raising our kids beautifully. Thank you for raising Nako into a woman who is kind hearted, firm, passionate, and working hard to her dreams. Thank you for raising Hiichan into a woman who is delicate, proper, kind hearted, and supporting her dreams. Thank you for raising Yujin into a woman who is brave, strong, and puts her family above everything. And thank you for raising Wonyoung into a woman who is warm, dedicated, proper, and emphatic. Thank you for everything you have done to our family.”

Eunbi sobbed harder as she held into her wife’s hands.

“... And I’m sorry for leaving you alone, for raising our kids alone. I’m sorry I wasn’t there physically, I’m so sorry. You have worked hard, honey.”

Sakura leaned closer with her eyes closed, making Eunbi lowered her eyelids. It’s like magic when Sakura’s lips connect with her. It felt like welcoming an old, nostalgic warmth. Eunbi could feel her heart felt like flying and the whole time seemed to stop, as if reality faded. Their lips moved in unison intensely, as if showing off how they missed each other dearly. Eunbi felt lightheaded as they disconnected their lips, trying to catch a breath. At least for Eunbi. She felt Sakura resting their forehead together, as she brushed their nose together. Both stared at each other lovingly, and longingly.

“Take a rest, my love. I’m here now.”

….

…

“Mommyyyy! We’re baaack~!”

Wonyoung’s excited voice echoed around their childhood home. Yujin inhaled deeply, trying to identify foods that her mom made for them.

“Hmm~ I smell Kimchi jjigae, hmmm, ohooo japchae! Hmmm, Won I smell meat!”

Nako laughed as she tried to take off her shoes behind her sister.

“Yah, are you a dog?!”

Hitomi chuckled as she brought her suitcase inside the house.

“Have you forgotten her nickname, unnie? Yudingie~”

As her sisters bicker behind her, Wonyoung has already made her way to the kitchen, trying to find the person she missed the most.

“Mommyyy! Your baby is hooomeeee!”

Wonyoung saw the food had been plated on the table, ready to be eaten. But her mother figure has not been found.

“Mommyy~ Ohh there you are!”

Wonyoung skipped her way to the sofa, where her mom was found sleeping. Wonyoung giggled as she saw her mom sleeping soundly.

“She must be tired.”

Wonyoung took a seat beside her mom and wrapped her arms around her before she rested her head on her mom’s shoulder, like she used to do. Her eyes widened and her smile faded the moment her ear touched her mother’s body. Wonyoung pulled away immediately as her tremor hands held her mother. She could hear her sister's steps coming her way but her eyes never left the serene face of her mother who was holding a picture of the family.

“...Mommy?”

--

A/N

It’s a wrap! Thank you so much for joining me in this journey of the Miyawaki Family.

It’s been such a great journey with all of you, who’s been here since day one. I have mixed feelings about this. This story has been dear to me, as one of the stories that I wrote after taking a four years break from writing. Without me knowing, this story helps me grow in terms of writing and as a person.

I used to write this story in a rush, as I write this based on real life events. Knowing myself as an impatient yet forgetful person, I wrote everything in one breath. Means, tons of typos and grammatical errors. But, I enjoyed doing that, a lot. It’s such a fun thing to do, reading your comments. Not gonna lie, I could smile the whole day because of your comments, and for that I’m grateful. And nothing makes me happier than knowing my stories brightened up your days. It warms my heart, like seriously. And I feel honored.

There are times where I’m too focused on people’s opinion, and makes me feel insecure with my own writing. I felt like I was holding a double edge sword. I was trying to be careful, resulting in me stopping my brains from thinking about new ideas.

And as the time went by, I realized I’ve become greedy. I forced myself to write, I stressed myself to find ideas. Writing used to be an escape for me. Because of this greediness of mine, writing has become something like a burden for me.

Therefore, I decided to stop writing, at least for now. Not because of the situation of the group, but more for myself. I will probably still write short stories on my twitter (you can check me at @yeonier), but not one-shot or multi-shots. And I feel like I need to sort things out within myself. But who knows, I might come back before you know it, depending on my mood really.

Anyway, it’s been such a great journey and pleasure to write this one. I am forever and beyond grateful for all of you who’s been reading this. Your support keeps me going this far. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

The Miyawaki Family signing out.

Yeonier signing out.