The warm light on your eyelids triggered you to open your eyes. The beige ceiling with glow-in-the dark star stickers reminded you where you were. You sat up and looked around your familiar bedroom and afterwards stretched yourself out of a comfortable sleep. Your eyes hurt from crying all night, but oddly, you felt different inside. Your chest that originally harbored the feelings of grief was now filled with relief and harmony.

As soon as you finished brushing your teeth and washing your face, you headed over to your Grandfather’s spa. His employees welcomed you and you greeted them in return.  

Your Grandfather walked out of a small office room and you approached him.

“Grandpa, has the morning been busy? I’ll take some phone calls for you if you like,”

Instead of agreeing, your Grandfather suggested you head over to eat breakfast. You frowned as you made your way over to the dining room of the spa.

You sat there staring at your food with little appetite. Even with a help of a macadamian cookie, you still had no appetite. Diagonal from you, a little boy stared at his food, unengaged as well.

“Where are your parents?” you asked. He pointed to his Dad that was grabbing a few pieces of fruits from the counter. You placed your macadamian cookie onto his small plate full of veggies and whispered, “Cookies taste better in the morning,”

The little boy smiled showing two missing front teeth. You watched him anxiously pick up the cookie with both hands. As he bit into it, he glanced over at his Father to check if he was returning. You chuckled at his cute demeanor. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure your Dad doesn’t get upset, ok?” you stated and stood up to approach his father.

On your way out of the dining room you returned home through the backdoor. You made your way back to the swinging bench beneath the pine tree and found yourself thinking of returning to the mountains after your janitor year ended.

You gave your grandfather a hug before you let go and counseled, “Don’t work too hard,”

“It’s not working if you enjoy it,” you Grandfather replied and you made a face. “Be good and listen to Mr. Kwon. And no more crying ok?”

“Ok,” you answered and looked at your Grandfather one last time before turning around to get into the black car. From inside, you stared at him, as if trying to imprint the image of him into your mind.

On the way back home, you wondered if Emjae was happy. If he was, then maybe that was all that mattered. But what were you to do now that he no longer existed in your life?

You stepped out of the black car and stared at your small apartment. Your eyes shifted over to Dokyeom’s condo and you wondered what he was doing. It was already late that night and maybe he was already asleep. That probably explains why