This is not a regular Chapter ^^... First person point of view O:)) xx
Now Playing: The 1975 - Me

I had a best friend…

We met in middle school…

He was the funniest person I’ve ever met...

He had perfect baby skin, just like a girl’s. He hated when I told him that. People would think he’s so weak and fragile, but he never was, he was scary, he could finish you if he wanted to. I looked up to him, I loved hanging out with him, and I loved him, because he was my best friend.

I spent every day with him, I never questioned is decisions, I’d always listen to him, copy his every move, I strived to be like him, but something changed, he changed, and I got scared.

His parents got a divorce, and he became miserable, he didn’t care about anyone, he started ruining himself, and I couldn’t let that happen, but who am I to help him? I was nothing.

Drugs…

Smoke…

Girls…

I hated those days, they were the hardest, our friendship started getting worse, we started drifting apart, because I never agreed to be like him. He’d push me into doing things that I hated, he’d start questioning our friendship.

One day he said I didn’t trust him, can you believe that? I did trust him, but not when he was drunk, not when he was high, and definitely not when he was angry. He was a monster, he didn’t care about anyone, he liked seeing people suffer; he liked seeing me suffer.

I was hit, abused, cursed at, I became nothing to him, and at the end of every day, he’d call to say he loved me, that I was the only one left for him, he’d even ask of me to take care of him, because he was scared of being alone, and he was afraid that one day I’d leave him.

I never meant to, but my parents found out about everything that he made me do, they became furious, they hated him, even though I assured them I did nothing, I never did anything wrong, I just sat at a corner and watched as his life turned into hell, what’s so wrong about that? Why did they have to take me away from him?

I remember I once saw him cry, the day that Kris, my new best friend, tried to take me away from him, it was the first time I ever saw him break down, he wouldn’t let go of me. he kept pulling at my sleeve, begging me not to go, but Kris, was he heartless? He just snatched my arm away from him, he pushed him away, and he screamed at him and told him to stay away from me.

Kris isn’t heartless right? He just cared about me, he wanted to protect me, but from what? How can he think that he could cause me any harm? He loved me, I was everything he had left.

We grew apart, I stopped seeing him, and I missed him every day, but I never went to check up on him. Soon I started forgetting about him, I started working with my dad, high school was a blast.

I met new friends…

Chanyeol, Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, Kai, Taemin, and Suho…

They were all Kris hyung’s best friend, yes; I started calling him hyung, because I loved him so much, everyone did. He was nothing like anyone I’ve ever seen, he was strong, independent, handsome, and tall, he was everything I wasn’t, and I wanted to be like him.

Kris hyung went into a coma, I knew who did it, it was him, he wanted to take revenge, he wanted to hurt me because I left him, I hate him; how could he hurt Kris hyung like that?

Kris hyung woke up, he couldn’t move, they said his legs weren’t functioning well, why?

Kris hyung blamed me, he blamed all of us; he blamed all of us for not being able to walk, but why? We did nothing.

Kris hyung said it was my entire fault, Kris hyung said he hated me, he said I was nothing but trouble, that I was the reason he was kept in a chair. I was confused; I thought he loved me, didn’t he? Why was he blaming me? I did nothing.

Kris hyung was gone….

He was gone. I only had my other six friends, though Suho hyung told me to stay away from Taemin.

Something’s not right, everyone’s drifting apart, I only have Kai now, he’s my best friend, though I think he like Kyungsoo hyung better, how couldn’t he? Hyung brings him food every day, he lets him into the hotel he owns for free, he hangs out with him a lot, and it’s then that I’m all alone.

Now I’m left alone, and I can’t believe this because…

I only think about you, I miss you, I’m sorry; I just don’t want to be alone anymore…

Luhan hyung…

I miss you…

Everything is changing…

Everyone’s leaving…

Everyone’s hurting…

I am too, because, my friends, they’re all miserable.

I’m trying to help them, but it no use.

Kris hyung left…