Username: commonless

Story Title (&link): Dear Future Girlfriend

Main Characters (+pairings): OC + Jungkook

Genre(s): Comedy, Romance, Drama and Angst

Current Length (No. of Chapters): 7

Rated?: No

Reviewer: Jaekkae

_______________ ✦일부분 일; part one; the beginning. ✦_______________

Title;  3/5

I found “Dear Future Girlfriend” really irrelevant to the story at the moment. There is no connection other than the ‘future girlfriend’ bit since we all know that Jae is going to be a future girlfriend of either V or Jungkook. I am still wondering why there is a ‘Dear’ in the title. It’s not about a letter so I am really clueless at the moment. Also, there is already a lot of stories with titles that have ‘Future Girlfriend’ or ‘Girlfriend’ in them, so I thought that this story was going to be really cliche (which kind of is).

Poster/Background; 4/5

I like the poster and the background. The poster actually gives the feeling that V is the jerk and Jungkook is the nice and childish guy. Plus Jae is the cold girl. The poster is created really well. But I don’t the names are really necessary in the poster.

Description & Foreword;  7/10

One word for your description. Cliche. It is very cliche. From the goody-two-shoe part to the bet. I actually despise these kind of stories since the plotlines are pretty similar to each other. Your story stands out more because the main girl isn’t a nerd. Everything about the description is fine but it is too overused in a way.

______________ ✦두 번째 부분; the second part; the seam.✦______________

Plot;  18/25

I felt really bad for saying this again but it is cliche and overused. Unless there is a dramatic plot twist then I don’t think it’d be that interesting. It would be more exciting to read if there is more action and chemistry.

Spelling, Vocab, and Grammar;   15/15

I can’t remember if I found any mistakes but I really enjoy the fact that I read it peacefully without any cringe-worthy mistakes.

Characterization;   12/15

I feel as if Jae is getting comfortable with Jungkook way too quickly for my liking. They just met for like 3-4 days and she has already the love-symptoms. Heart warming and beating. It might not seem much but it means more than it sounds. I still don’t get V though, he is so bipolar and stuff. I sometime want to kick him in the myself and the bet was his fault as well… /sigh/ Jungkook is the naive idiot in this story, though he is not that naive to be honest. You made him some weak and dumb when he actually can speak for himself.

_______________ ✦일부분 삼; part three; the little things. ✦_______________

Chapter Titles;  -/5

I didn’t mark this since there wasn’t any.

Flow;  8/10

The pace doesn’t really suit your story well. I think it is going a little too slow for the genres. (Also I can’t really find the romcom side to the story yet but I can already sense the angst and drama.)

Writing Style (format + your style);  9/10

I find your layout really neat and tidy but I think the font needs to be a bit bigger or increase the line-height. It is because you have a lot of words in a paragraph and I find it a little too crowded. So I sometime skip the lines.

I find this one thing about your writing style a little bothering. I’ll give an example; when you mentioned that Jungkook is weak, I got it. From that moment when I saw that, I knew it very clearly, but then… you suddenly mentioned it again when they’re talking about the bet. I suddenly had the urge to roll my eyes because I, personally, find that really annoying. I don’t need to be told twice when I already know. Though, I enjoyed reading the story with the way you wrote it.

Bonus;  +5

I enjoyed the story so I would like to give bonus. cx

Extra & Notes;

I hope you don’t take this the wrong way since I really did enjoy the story. I just prefer a more less cliche and more unique plotline. :)

Total Score; ♡

81/95