Chapter 43 - Unexplainable.

 

 I guess when you say you're in love it involves a sense of feeling, unexplaianbly; it hurts, unexplainably; it makes you happy, unexplainably; its sad. Unexplainably, you're in love.

 

 "Why me?"

 

 

 "Why you?"

 

 "I don't feel like I deserve you.."

 

 

  As I hear her say such words, I thought of the past days where I happen to be a crazy stalker. I followed her around, watch her and sometimes I even ask the teachers about her. Why does she have to say she does not deserve me? Whereas I already gave my everything to her from the start. I was devoted to her, no one else.

 

 "Well I don't deserve you either, Seo.."

 

 I wanna see how she answers this, how she will attack and counter it. I wonder, did she ever find me attractive back then, like how I liked her?

 

 "You do."

 

 "Why?"

 

 "Because I love you.."

 

 Does that mean you don't feel my love for you? I'm quite confused. You said I deserve you because you love me so in simple logic, I love you so you deserve me. Does it work that way?

 

 She then snuggled on me, hugged me tight. I find my dilenmas no longer there as soon as she did. I didn't mind our earlier arguement about this deserving problem.. When it all comes down into it, being with her is what matters to me.

 Being with her, what I always say.

 

 "Seohyun, did you know why I love you?"

 

 "I dont know.. Why?"

 

 "Its unexplainable."

 

 She frowned, of course if it was me I would have done the same. I have my whole self to blame about that though, I did open up a topic and I could not provide a better support to it. Stupid, Im Yoona. You always are..

 

 Seohyun let out a long sigh, I guess she really needs an explanation.

 

 Stupid. I always am when Seohyun comes in to my mind. Now that I think of it, its a fact about me. I walk around town and when I recieve a text from Seohyun, I hit a post or I bump on to people. I sometimes day dream about her, especially when she recites something in the class. I remember falling down the stairs because I got so excited going to Korea. Uhgh. Lots of more experiences, Seohyun doesn't know how reckless and careless I can be, when she's involved.

 

 Going back to Seohyun. I tapped her shoulder. "Ok.. Listen ok?" I wanted to try and explain. I dont need to be careful.. I'll pour my everything to this. To show her my love.

 

 She sat comfortably in front of me.

 "Do you remember when I used to.. Bother you.."

 

 "When you used to bully me?" I was trying to avoid that word 'bully' but she just had to say it.

 

"I just.. Want you to notice me.."

 

"You could have done it nicely.."

 Yeah she's right but I was so young back then that I didnt know how will I convey that I want her attention.  Eventually her love.

 

 "Aiish but you were so cute.. Bothering you was fun."

 "Bullying me.." She just had to insist that, I really just want her attention.

 

 "Alright! But Im so sorry about that.. Really." I held on to her hand to show my sincerity. "I guess you remember it all well..Now will you listen to what I'll say my love?" I'm smooth sometimes am I? Being Yuri's cousin is really useful at times.

 

Seohyun was a short cute girl back in our elementary days. She's wearing a pony tail, always neat and clean. I was still in Korea that time, Yuri and Tiffany were also in the same school but they were a year ahead of us.

 Seohyun's always quiet, she has her nerdy friends and I have mine. I seat behind her and she never talks to me because she's always busy reading or writing or chatting with her co-nerds.

 I wanted to talk to her so I tried calling her name once.

 "Joohyun-ah.. Psst!" She continued reading her book. I tried again.

 "Joohyun-ah? Hello." Still no response.

 "Seo Joohyun?" Still the same. I thought she was def. Really I did.

 

 Next time I tried calling her she's still the same. We were seatmates but hell she really does not talk to me. So one time I tried something.. I took her book while she was reading. She looked at me.

 "Give that back." First time she even layed her eyes on me. She's really cute.

 "This is too thick and heavy.. Hmm.." I read the title... "To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee?" I simply though is she gonna kill some birds?

 

 She snatched the book from me. She looked at me with a glare. "Its an inspirational book. Im-ah."

Starting that day I always do that to her, well atleast we get a bit of conversation from that. Sometimes I steal her lunch, sometimes I . Other times I even pinch her nose suddenly. Haha, she's cute when she's mad.

 After a year, I needed to go to US to continue my studies there. At first it wasn't much of a bother. But as my classmates bid farewell to me, Seohyun didn't. I went all over the school to find that kid. She was sitting behind a tree.

 

 "Keroro-ssi, I finished the inspirational book today! Its very good." Seohyun was talking to this small frog doll. I approached her and I snatched the doll from her.

 "Are you crazy?! You're talking to a doll?!" She quickly stood up and tried to reach for her doll. She's not that tall back then so I raised my hand high and even if she tip-toed she still can't reach it. "Give it back.."

 "Next time." I smirked. She sat down again and frowned. "Seo.." I called her.

 

"Seo-hyun." I called her that way for her to notice me a bit. She didn't look at me. I guess she was really upset.

 

 I left Korea and as the years pass, only one person made me feel like I was having a sick mental disease of Histrionic disorder. I needed Seohyun's attention always because the way she looked at me, I remeber the first time she did. It was magic, unexplainable.

 

I held on to Seohyun's checks and looked at her straight. I looked at her chubby checks and then her eyes. I pinched her nose, i'm overloaded with her cuteness.

 "Yaah! Y-yoona!" She screamed in pain.  I laughed and stopped of course but it was simply irresistable.

 

 "How I loved you.. I stil can't explain. But I really feel this certain feeling when your with me. When your away I feel sad, when you laugh I laugh.. I just.. Loved you that way." She smiled a bit maybe satisfied with how I conveyed it.

 

 "But it's really unexplainable, Seohyun. How much I love you? Not even the word infinite and beyond are enough. " I smiled back, its not cheesy words. Its my heart.

 

 "Maybe the phrase 'I love you' is enough Yoona." She rested her head on my shoulder. I rested my head on hers as well.

 

 

 "I told you. It's unexplainable.. But ok I'll say it. I love you.. So much."

 

 

 

 

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OTP FLUFF = Choikufu tears. TT_____TT

I warned you guys right? From the last chapter. This chapter and the last are not connected.. haha :D But the 044 will be. :)

Anyways I just tried this kind of view and writing, a practice for my next fanfic. It will be a light-drama one. So I hope you can

give me advices and suggestion with this kind of writing of mine

.

Oh and I dedicate this chapter to a special someone. Because I feel unexplainable towards this person too :)

 

Thank you so much guys! :D For all the support do stay tuned!

 

 

-choikufu