When Hyuk's voice reached his ears, N could almost feel his heart stop. His whole body freeze and becomes stiff. He could only watch helplessly as Ken charges towards Hyuk and starts beating him up. He can hear them screaming at each other. He can hear the sounds of the slap. He hear everything but nothing actually means anything to him. 

However, a certain sentence snapped him out of his dazed state. 

"It's better if you're forever gone from our sight! "

'What? '

'Jaewhan... stop...'

'Don't say that.. '

"Stop... "N finally manages to blurt that one word out. 

Luckily, all three of s who are still hugging him heard him. Leo quickly gets to his feet just as Ken is about to throw a punch at Hyuk and stops him. 

However, Leo said the wrong words himself when he claims that Hyuk is no longer their dongsaeng. 

It breaks N's heart even more. 

' What have I done? '

'I made them like this. '

'I caused this chaos. '

'Hyuk was right. I'm useless. '

'I'm disgusting. '

He still watches as Hongbin interferes, telling Hyuk to leave. 

And Hongbin's words does nothing but adds to N's heart break. If he even have anything else in his heart to be broken, that is. 

Again, he watches as Hyuk leaves. He wants to scream, to stop the maknae but he feels numb. His voice would no longer come out. 

He stares back at Ken when the main vocalist finally pays attention to him. 

'What have you done, Jaehwan? '

'You're not this type of person. You're not violent. '

'Has I turned you this way? '

'Has I forced you to change? '

'Has I caused all this? '

He could feel Ravi's embrace over him tightening but it no longer gives him any comfort, not like before.

It actually makes him feel even worse. He feels like the rapper is trying to crush him to death, to suffocate him. And he feels like he deserve it for all the disaster he has caused. 

"Hyung... "Ken starts, taking a step towards him. 

N's breathing hitched. 

"I'm... sorry."Another step.

Ken tries his best to approach the leader without startling him because he can see that the leader is very fragile at the moment and if he is to take one wrong step, the leader would probably break. 

Of course, he's oblivious to the fact that the precious leader of theirs has already broken a while ago. And he's far too broken to be mended. 

If only they know that. 

If only they stopped before it reached this point.