KRYSTAL’S POV:

The last conversation that I had with Amber was at the pool, and clearly it didn’t end well but only added to a misunderstanding. After that, as expected of him he did what I ask him to, the space, but being away just made all things clear to me. I’ve been missing his cooking, his scent, his warmth, his touch, his smile and most of all how it feels to be beside him. But how can I? How can I be selfish? I promised Uncle Liu that I’ll look after Aiden just until he’s fully recovered, and the real reason why I agreed? Is because whenever I look at Aiden all the guilt came rushing through me, remembering that he was the one that I clinged to when I felt so alone when unnie left and when I ran away from dad. I can’t take to leave him with his situation, but it’s killing me when I see Amber hurting, I know it’s because of me, and it hurts me that I couldn’t even do anything that’s why I’m keeping my distance. I’m not blind not to see that Aiden is still in love with me, I can see how hurt he is through his eyes, the common thing that they have is that their eyes don’t lie.

I miss you Am, like hell I miss you so much but how could I approach you if you won’t even talk to me, and remembering how I broke you when  you saw us that day, you won’t even hear my explanation. You’ve missed out two of my checkups already, and here I am being scolded by who else Tiff unnie, I’ve lost some weight, I couldn’t even sleep well at night that I can’t afford, and I’m going through my third trimester alone so I need to take care of myself more. I even force myself to eat and it’s been a while since I’m genuinely happy. I’ve been waiting for Amber to call me, text me or even visit me, but I guess he wouldn’t do that anymore, I’ve hurt him to much already and I understand If he doesn’t wanna see me, see us anymore. I used to go to Aiden’s every afternoon, Uncle Liu sends Mr. Park to pick me up, the truth is I never decline to it because I was hoping to see Amber, well I know he visits every night, and yes it’s because he’s avoiding me big time. I was so disappointed when one afternoon he came but after seeing me he immediately bid goodbye to us, well there’s really nothing between me and Aiden. But I won’t lie, Aiden treats me like he used to just like before, but clearly every time I set limit between us I see the hurt in his eyes, I hope he’ll accept it sooner or later that everything is different now.

Sunday had been my favorite day for the past month coz it’s the only day that I’ve got to see him, and of course I always ask unnie the updates about him. It made me smile when unnie told me that Amber had been worrying and asking about me when I left our house, if only unnie told me earlier then I would be happy but I guess Amber didn’t want me to know. Plus what made me so happy is that Amber’s the one who’d been cooking the grilled beef that unnie lied telling me that she bought somewhere near Yuri’s favorite restaurant. Aish! I knew it the taste was really familiar, I think I made her worry too much since I’m not really eating well ever since I left home but thanks to that beef I’m now gaining weight but I’m afraid that I’m getting too fat nowadays. It’s odd when Uncle Liu called unnie to come early to their house for something important? I feel anxious about this, but of course I didn’t forget to look good in front of Amber’s eyes, I badly need to. Unnie was dragging me to her car, what’s so urgent that we need to be there this early? I whined.

I held my tears as I saw the pictures that Uncle Liu handed to us, seeing those pictures makes me wanna strangle Amber to death in an instant. I was just gone for almost two months for Christ sake! Yuri oppa came in