I have woken up, now. I know that it was not a nightmare and KRIS IS REALLY GONE, EXO ARE NOW 11!  And they may be truly mad about it and they may truly feel "betrayed".

Seeing Kris in their poster, even if SM updated it after the news of that day, makes me feel as if he's going to be there the D day...

You know what hurts the most? It's their hard work of years that flew away in few seconds. 

Kai fell today in the middle of their performance. Chanyeol, our happy virus had red teary eyes when they won. Baek was absent-minded too and looking at Suho with sad eyes.

And it's not the first time they perform even though injured! Kai, Lay, Sehun, Yeol... they all have done their best even though in pain. Tao had high temperature and was sick when he also performed and even did the flip.

That time when I read Tao's old posts on weibo, before even being a trainee in SM and also in his predebut, I cried, because he had sacrificed a lot of things, he had made a lot of efforts, but then I smiled and said:" At least you now have reached what you've been looking for!" He seems to enjoy every stage, to appreciate everything his fans do, even the small banners they hold in every stage. He seems grateful for the smallest thing.

THEY ALL HAVE WORKED FOR YEARS TO ONE DAY HAVE THEIR OWN CONCERT!

Remember in their Japan greeting party, how much they were touched? How much they were excited? How much my baby Tao had cried?

But now... they have to fix everything in just few days, they're tired, they need rest.

Are they really going to enjoy their first concert? 

I've always been sure they were going to cry, but tears of joy