Kyuhyun’s POV:

                I pounded on the door and pleaded for Tae Hee to open it. My heart felt like being ripped into two. She’s crying. No sobbing is the right word. I couldn’t quite shake the image of her walking down that aisle her face a mask of pain. I felt the longing in my heart but I couldn’t concentrate on that, all I could think of is how horrible this can be to her.

                “Tae Hee…please open the door.” I begged.

                In the corner of my eye I saw Sungmin approaching. “Go away, Minnie. I’ll handle this.”

                “Not without this.” Sungmin said waving a key at me.

                I grab it from him and unlocked the door in front of me. And then I saw her on the floor, her knees drawn up to her chest, rocking back in forth. She’s trying to calm herself without success.

                I cursed myself silently.

                I crossed the room where she sat, in just two strides, knelt down beside her and touched her arm. I felt her flinch at my touch and I was forced to take my hand back.

                “Go away.” she mumbled in a hoarse whisper. “I don’t want to see you. I don’t want you here.”

                “Tae Hee…” I don’t know where to start. “I’m sorry…I. Believe me I didn’t know this will happen.”

                “Because of you I have to relive it all again in my head.” she said angrily, not looking up.

                I closed my eyes and opened them again. “I know…it hurts. It’s my fault but please listen to me. Let’s talk about this.”

                “You don’t know anything.” she snapped.

                “Then let me know!” I answered exasperatedly. “I want to know.”

                Tae Hee looked up and gave me a glare. “Do you think I can just tell it to you in one sentence, huh? You think it’s that easy?!”

                “I just don’t want you to shut me out.” I reasoned with her. “We have to talk about it.”

                “I don’t want to talk about it.” she shouted. “Don’t you get it?”

                Of course I get it but how can I make her understand that it’s time for us to face it, to talk about it. I tried to take her hand but she just slapped it away.

                “Can’t you see it hurts?” she cried, getting to her feet.

                I can see it. I can see it perfectly. Her eyes, her face, her voice, all of it convey how it hurts.

                “I can see it but that doesn’t mean I’m not hurting too.” I said holding up my hands. “Every time you go away and pretend not to know me is likes slapping me in the face for all the awful things I’ve done to you.”

                “Oh are you hurt now?” she argued back. “That’s nothing compared to what I felt when you decided not to marry me anymore.”

                Of course I know that too.

                Tae Hee jabbed a finger at me. “Do you know how much I love you back then, huh?”

                “I know…” I started to say only to be cut off again by her.

                “No you don’t!” she said shaking her head. “Because if you do, you wouldn’t have left me like that. You were my life Kyuhyun and I’ve never loved like that in my whole life.”

                I just stood there like a statue, letting all her words drop on me like a bomb but I know her words weren’t enough. It’s not going to be enough. I wish she will just hit me, hurt me physically because my heart couldn’t take this right now.

                “Do you know how scared I am?” Tae Hee asked. “I’m scared because I don’t know if I’ll be able to trust another man again.”

                The apology I’m trying to muster died on my lips.

                “Don’t apologize because it’s over.” she said backing away to the door. “You’ve already done the damage. Three years have passed; it’s too late for that.”

                I reached towards her but she wouldn’t let me touch her. I saw he walked towards the door but then she turned around again.

                Tae Hee fixed her gaze at me and with a shaky voice she asked. “Just tell me one thing. Wae? Why did you do it? What did I do to deserve that?”

                “You didn’t deserve what I did.” I answered.

                “Answer me!!” she screamed.

                I hate myself. I hate myself for the horrible answer I am to give her. I wish she doesn’t have to ask that question but I can’t avoid the inevitable. She needs an answer and I don’t have any choice but to give it to her.

                “Two months after I proposed to you I got accepted to SME.” I answered, the words tumbling over one another. “I didn’t mention auditioning because I never imagined that they’ll accept me and with all the wedding preparations I wasn’t able to say anything about it.”

                 I paused and she gave me the look that tells me that she’s beginning to understand. She’s beginning to understand the worst.

                I forced myself to continue. “They gave me a few weeks to decide. I need to under go trainings before debut and they said that I couldn’t focus on that if I’m going to be married already. I need to make a choice.”

                “And you choose your career.” Tae Hee said, disbelief written all over her face. “Is that what you’re telling me?”

                “No!” I answered hurriedly.

                “Then what?” she asked, new tears forming in her eyes.

                “I was confused.” I mumbled weakly. “You know how much I wanted to become a singer and then the opportunity came up. I didn’t know how to tell you to put our wedding off for a while and…”

                “So you just cancelled on the exact date.” she stated it like a fact.

                “Aniyo.” I replied. “I was confused that day and I wanted to talk to you but they said you’re leaving and they won’t tell me where you are.”

                “They did the right thing.” Tae Hee said finally and left me there.

                I sat in that room for a very long time, mentally exhausted. I replayed our conversation in my head over and over and none if it comes out good.

                Sungmin appeared in the doorway, unsure of what to do.

                “You’ve been here for four hours.” Sungmin said. “It’s already dark outside.”

                “Did they suspect anything?” I asked, talking about the crews.

                “No, I took care of it.” Sungmin replied and I nodded my thanks. I don’t want Tae Hee to be caught up in another bad situation.

                I didn’t make any desire to move and Sungmin decided to sit with me.

                 “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

                “Aniyo.” I replied.

                I was looking at my hands and then my vision got blurry. I wiped the tears away, refusing to be seen like this.

                “You still love her don’t you?” Sungmin asked quietly. “That’s why you still care. That’s why you couldn’t walk away from her.”

                I bowed my head.

                “Yes.” I whispered fervently. “Yes, I still love her.”

                But none of this matters. This is the consequence of what I’ve done.