It’s been days passed since that night. I received two marriage proposals. And the most foolish thing I’ve ever done, I said yes.

 I ran as fast as I could and cried in a hidden corner. It hurts so much. Apologize? It won’t make it better. There is nothing left.

I was still crying. It hurts so much. I love him. I cried until I ran out of tears. I don’t care if they are looking for me. I just want time to clear out my mind and be okay. Though I know it would take me days, weeks, months or even year to recover.

When I felt better, I wiped my drenched-with-tears face and fixed my hair. I was about to stand up when I heard voices talking. I looked around and I found out I was near the library.

I got closer.

“… seriously, Hae, you need to tell her.” It’s Tiffany.

“Whatever, Tiff. I won’t.” Donghae.

I got more curious so I tried to peep. I saw Tiffany looking so frustrated of calm Donghae. How could Hae Oppa stay calm every time?

“Hae! Weren’t you listening?” Hae didn’t say anything. “You have been protecting her, making sure nothing comes and hurt her.”

Hae looked at Tiffany this time. “Tiff, it’s because I love her. So much,” he said, almost begging.

And it flooded me with guilt when I heard and saw how serious he was while saying it.

“Ugh! Can you be selfish some time? You’re so goody-goody!”

I almost cry when I heard it again. He always says he loves me that’s why he’s protecting me.

“That’s the point! You need to tell her!”

Tell me about what? Dammit! Just say it!

He shook his head. “There’s no point in doing that.”

Tiffany held his arm. “At least tell her you won’t be with her forever.”

My eyes went wide. What is she trying to imply?

Donghae bowed his head and when he looked up; I saw tears streamed down his face. I was hurt. Truthfully, I was. Then calmly, these words slipped through his lips: I will be with her forever.

Tears streamed down my face, too guilty and too hurt because I was so inconsiderate. I’m sorry, Hae.

But before I could turn around and walk away, he spoke which made me cry even more.

“I’ll tell her soon. I’ll tell her about my condition, that I have a heart disease.”

That night, when he proposed, I said yes. It was not because of his condition but because I have thought of the times we shared and we were happy. We were happy being together, because Hae understands me. And he is open to everything. He may be protective, but that’s him. I have known him for being one.

I was so glad he looked so happy that night. He seemed to be the luckiest guy that night. I can’t say no, I won’t say no. He had sacrificed so much for me. He sacrificed his life, his family just to protect me. And I felt like an unpleasant princess for ditching and cheating on him. I’m awful.

I was reading a book in the library when someone knocked. I looked up and saw Donghae smiling at me, holding a bouquet of lavender roses. Huh? Where did he get those?

“Can I come in?” he asked.

I smiled and rolled my eyes. “Of course, come in.”

He let himself in and met me with a soft kiss on my lips. I smiled when he handed me the flowers.

“Thank you, Hae,” I said and smelled the flowers. I was surprised when, in the middle, I noticed the hair clip—butterfly hair clip. It was mine. I looked at him.

He smiled and got it. “I kept it for months, Sica. When my father said I should really forget about you, I couldn’t do as he says. You are already embarked here,” he pointed at his chest. His real condition struck me. I grew guiltier.

He continued. “I had these through those months to remember how much you are too perfect for me. I’m sorry I ended it. But now, I will always be with you. Forever.”

Tears escaped my eyes. He knew there would be no forever for the both of us but here, he said it though I know it hurts.

He wiped my tears and said, “I love you, Jung Soo Yeon, soon to be Lee Sooyeon.”

I smiled and said, “I love you, too.” And I was the one who kissed him first to seal our oath.

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