JESSICA

“Jessica,” I heard someone call me. I looked up and saw Siwon Oppa by the door. I was in my study room, reviewing the progress of our Kingdom since I left. I know that I should know all about this. “Can I come in?”

I smiled and nodded, “Of course, come in.” I pushed aside those books and took off my glasses. He sat on one of the chairs in front of me. “What is it, Oppa?”

He scowled and said, “You need to tell me something.”

My eyebrows rose. “What? I don’t get you,” I said, trying to remember something that I need to tell him but I can’t remember any.

“Jessica, I am your best friend and I know you since only God knows. I also know you like that kind boy,” he said which makes me stiff for a moment. I immediately came back to my senses when he put his hand on mine. I stared at him, perplexed. “You can always talk to me. You know it, don’t you?”

I nodded, bowed my head and said, “Yes.” I closed my eyes for a moment and looked up at Siwon after. “And you are right, I kinda like him,” I confirmed.

He reached over and caressed my cheek. “Then why do you look so sad?”

“I am cheating on Donghae, Oppa,” I said. I finally told someone about my feelings for Suho and I regretted I never asked nor talked to Siwon about it until just now when he asked me. I do like Suho.

He shrugged, “Maybe, but at least you are not lying and denying.”

Feeling so confused, I grabbed his shirt and pleaded, “Oppa, please tell me what to do. I am tangled! Tell me!”

He laughed and took both of my hands off his shirt. Softly, he said, “Who do you love?”

“Huh?”

“Who do you love, Donghae or Suho?”

I gulped. Oh my God! It’s even harder than solving math problems! Composing myself, I tried my best to answer, “Oppa! It’s hard but I’ll try!” I sighed, “I do love Donghae, very much. It never changed. But…”

“But what?”

I stared at him and bowed my head after. “I have these feelings for Suho.”

“What kind of feelings, Sica?” Siwon lifted my chin up.

I pursed my lips and a tear escaped. Siwon, though shocked, wiped it away. He hugged me tight and caressed my hair. I started crying on his chest. “Siwon-ah,” I uttered.

“Sshh, it’s okay. You didn’t do anything wrong. You are just confused,” he said, stopping me from crying. He pushed me but still held my shoulders. He looked down into my eyes and said, “There’s nothing wrong with telling the truth, okay? But always remember, love is a maze. It takes a brave soul to go out, be free and strong. It makes you stronger and you now know how love works. It works in a mysterious kind of way. Please do not make a decision that won’t make you happy, okay?”

I wiped my tears away and nodded. I smiled, “Yes. I won’t. Thank you, Oppa,” I hugged him really tight.

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head before pulling away. “You good?” I nodded.

“Oppa, where’s Donghae?”

“He’s gone somewhere far with some guards. He’s protecting you,” he said.

I suddenly feel guilty. Donghae, I am sorry. “I think it’s good. But I feel responsible,” I said.

“Don’t be. Anyway, you two should not rush things,” he commented.

“Huh?”

“You are getting married, right? Don’t rush things, okay? You get married when you are really sure.”

I nodded and said, “Yes, thanks, Oppa. I’m going out.”

“Wae? Where?”

I bit my lower lip before I answered with, “I’m going out with Suho. He asked me to tell him about my oak tree.”

Siwon smiled. “Okay.”

“Thanks,” I smiled back. “Wait, will you do something for me?”

He stared at me for a moment, probably thinking it through. But then, he can’t resist my charm. He shrugged and said, “Anything.”

Though, feeling really guilty, I know that it’s gonna be for the best. I am not a good person and since I am, then just deal with it. I’m gonna be that person if you think I am that one.

I smiled. “Oppa, will you cover me up?”

“What?”

“When Donghae tries to look for me, please don’t tell him I am with Suho. Cover me up, Won-Won, like you always do,” I said.

Although I know he’s somewhat against it, I know he still understands. I just want to finally sort things out tonight.

He let a deep sigh and stared at me. “Jessica,” he started. “Okay, fine. I will, Sie-Sie. You can count on me,” he said and winked.

“That’s my Oppa,” I winked, too.

I smiled. I now know what I really want. I just hope he still does feel it, too. Suho, I am sorry but I want to say it to you. I hope you won’t hate me.

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