CHAPTER 99:

 

 

ILWOO's POV

 

 

"Ilwoo, please help me. I'm begging you, please. Take away this pain. Take me anywhere you want just take this pain away. Help me forget everything." Chelle begging for help. Crying her hearts out.

 

I woke up in the middle of the night breathing heavily. I glance at the clock beside our bed and found that it was just 28minutes pass 2AM. I went to our bathroom and wash my face then stare in my reflection in the mirror. A bad dream! A nightmare!

 

"Damn!" I scoff with my fist close. I saw her crying again. And it's killing me to see her begging for help. 

 

My hands went to grab my hair as I slowly sit in our bathroom floor. Good thing my wife's not here. I'm sure she'll get worried when she see me like these. I feel so weak. I thought I took way all the pain from her but I guess I didn't. 

 

I did everything for my wife. She don't deserve to get hurt, to shed even a single tear because of fear, pain and sadness. She's a good person and deserve to live happily with her life. 

 

I stand up and went to our room and sit in the bed. I glance at the clock again and grab her phone. She left it when she went to Japan with umma. I tap the screen and found unread messages. Curiousity hits me so I decided to open her inbox. Some messages were already marked read. I know it's not right but someone is telling me that I'm doing the right thing. The messages sent the day she appeared on my shooting set.  One by one I open the messages.

 

Message 1:

How dare you, Chelle? We trust you. How can you do it to us?

 

Message 2:

I'm so dissappointed to you. You really have change. You're not the same girl I used to know. What happen to you? 

 

Message 3:

Stay away from, Amber! I don't want to see you talking to her. How could you? She's innocent.

 

Message 4:

If you want to hurt me, do it to me. Don't used the people around me to get even. I know I hurt you a lot but you, hurting innocent people is really disappointing. 

 

What the ?! How can G-Dragon say those harsh words to my wife? What my wife did to him? What is he ing talking about? He has the guts to tell her like that when he's the reason why she's suffering a lot. 

 

My wife didn't tell me anything about this. She knows me enough that if I found about this I'll punch Jiyong to death. I swear I'll kill him. But why she didn't tell me? She endure the pain alone. She didn't reply to any of his messages. Taking his harsh words alone and just ignore him. My heart skip a beat as I scroll down the message. I check the date and time and found that it was send the day before my wife left for Japan.

 

Message 5:

I'm sorry, Chelle. I know I hurt you so much with the things I said. I know it's not right to just vent out my anger to you. I just realized I have so many shortcomings in the way I treated you. I wish I can talk to sanjangnim's decision on your suspension. I know your hurt. I'm sorry.

 

Suspended? Why? I scroll down again and almost catch my breath when I saw a reply from my wife.

 

"I'm okay, G-Dragon. Thank you!" 

 

It's just simple and there's nothing in the message but why I feel fear? Why I feel scared? Slowly all the memories came to me. From the day I talk to her when she finally gain her senses back after 3 months of being in coma. Then my dream flash back again.

 

I called my manager and ask him to buy me tickets to Japan ASAP. I need to be with my wife. I have to be with her.

 

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I finally learn the reason of her suspension when I read the paper my lawyer gave me in the airport. I went to Japan a day early to surprised my wife. I want to be with her. I bought her flowers before going to the mall. I watch and listened while she's having a "talk" with Kiko. The girl who hurt her big time.

 

I feel guilty for judging her before. For telling my wife that she shouldn't trust Kiko. She's been nice to me when we had a chance to work in a photoshoot together. But hearing about her talk and watching her act towards my wife is a big ball of truth hitting on my face. I'm really right from the start. She's no good at all. I never thought she can be this mean towards to my wife or to anybody. I just watch her as she walks pass through me before slapping my wife's hand. 

 

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We've been staying for days now here in Japan but my wife only stays inside our room. Sitting quietly on the window seat and staring at nothing. Sometimes I found her crying quietly while looking at her phone. Whenever I ask her what's wrong she will immediately change the topic. She always says she's okay. She always wipes her tears away and pretend to be fine. She always gives out a sweet smile but her eyes is telling the opposite. 

 

I patiently wait for her to talk and give her the space she needed. I know my wife. She will talk when she's ready. Everyday drags slowly for me. I feel weak. I feel useless. I know that there is something wrong with her but I can't do anything. I waited and waited. But she didn't talk until we went back to Seoul. 

 

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Friday afternoon I decided to go home early to surprise my wife. Today is our wedding anniversary and I reserve her favorite restaurant and pay it to be close for the day for our dinner later. Filled it with flowers. She's been upset this past few days and this is the only thing I can do to cheer her up and to tell her that I'm always here for her since she's still not talking. 

 

"Yeobo, I'm home!" I called the moment I enter our house.

 

Feeling so much giddy I went to our room. I called her again but she didn't answer. 

 

"Maybe she's in the bathroom." I said to myself and enter our room.

 

I found her sleeping in our bed, clutching the duvet while moving her head from left to right. Beads of sweat in her forehead. I immediately run to her and sit in the bed. But when I was about to hold her to wake her up my world collide. 

 

"Jiyong!" She whispers. I pull back my shaky hands and watch her. She keeps calling him. The way she says his name is like dagger stabbing my heart. I wanted to wake her up and stop her from calling his name but I can't move my body. I'm stuck in my place. My heart is beating fast and I feel like it wants to explode because of so many emotions.

 

With my remaining energy, I decided to stand up and walk away from her. I don't want to hear her talk again. It's not the first time she calls his name since our wedding. I crawled towards the window and hug my knees while covering my ears with my hands. I wanted to scream and tell her to stop but no words coming from my mouth.

 

I grab my phone on my pocket to call Minho but it fell from my hand.

 

"Baby don't leave me. I still love you!" She said. My soul literally diserted my body. My head automatically turn to her. Her eyes still close and there's tears running from her cheeks. I knew it right from the start but it's still hurts like hell. She's dreaming and it hurts to know that even in her dreams that guy is the one she trully loves. He's the one she's calling. 

 

I bit my lips tight that I get to taste my own blood. I cry so hard. My heart is beating so fast that any moment it will explore out of my chest. My whole body is shaking. I don't know how long I stayed in that position. Crying quietly nonstop as I watch my wife till my tears went dry. My wife? Is she really my wife? 

 

I gather all the strength I have and stand up. I walk slowly walks towards her and smile bitterly as I kiss her forehead. I make my way to the door. 

 

"Paul when Chelle wakes up and look for me tell her I'm going to be late. Tell her not to wait for me." I said. "And don't leave her alone. Here, call the restaurant and ask them to cancel my reservation." I hand him the calling card and walks out of the house.

 

I decided to use her car. I don't know where will I will go or what I will do. I just keep driving while thinking. Maybe I'll just keep driving till I run out of gasoline and stop in the middle of nowhere. Where I can't hear her say that name.

 

I keep driving and pull off the road when I spotted a convince store. I went in and buy some beer and drive again.  I found my self sitting in the hood of my car on the sides of Han River while drinking. I want to ease the pain for awhile. I want to pretend that I didn't tell her talk. My phone keeps on ringing but all I have to do is stare on the screen as it flashes my yeobo's name. 

 

"Yeobo!" I said to myself and smile bitterly. I decided to turn my phone off and drive to Gian's house. I'm in a mess right now and I'm a bit tipsy already. I went to a liquior store and buy more alcohol before heading to the penthouse.

 

"What are you doing here, Ilwoo-sshi? Where is Chelle?" Seungri ask me when he open the door. I just shrugged my shoulders and show him the bottle of wine that it's in a half as I made my way to their house. 

 

Seungri open the door wide for me to let me in. He help me walk into the couch and get the bottles of wine into my hands. Gian emerges from a room holding her daughter. 

 

"Ilwoo, my God what happen to you? Where's Chelle?" She ask worriedly.

 

"Why is everyone asking for her? Aren't you glad that I'm here?" I laugh a bit. Sure thing they really love my wife. And I love her. But she doesn't love me that much. "Here!" I hand her a some paper bags. "My wife went for a shopping when she founds out you're pregnant while where still in Japan. Come on let's drink! Call everyone. Celebrate with me. It's my wedding anniversary today." I continue and snatch the bottle to Seungri's hand and gulps it.

 

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I woke up at 5 in the afternoon and jump out of the bed then went straight to our bathroom to take a bath. It's our wedding anniversary today and I'm going to cook special dinner for me and my husband.

 

I went to the market this morning when my husband left for work. I bought everything I need and hid it on the storage room. After cooking I went to the gazebo and decorate it. Put flowers and prepare our table for tonight. 

 

After preparing the things I need I went upstairs took a quick shower and get dress. My husband will be here any moment. I went down and saw Paul passing from the kitchen.

 

"Hi Paul!" I greeted cheerfully.

 

He bow and smile at me.

 

"Uhmmm Mrs. Jung." He called. "Mr. Jung said he'll be late." 

 

"It's okay! I'll wait for him." I answered.

 

"But he said don't wait for him."

 

"Whaaaaaaaaat?" My voice echoed in the whole house. "It's our anniversary today. How can he forget about this day?"

 

He bow and excuse himself. I grab my phone and dial his number. I went to the gazebo and keep calling him but it just keeps in ringing. I waited and waited. I dial him again and to my surprise his phone is now turn off and my calls went straight to his voicemail. I started to get worried. I call Paul and Garyson when I decided to went inside the house. It's freezing outside.

 

"Did Ilwoo told you where he's going? Did he call?" I ask.

 

"No, Mrs. Jung. He was here this afternoon. But he went out again after telling us he'll be late. He used your car."

 

"What?" My knees went jelly. I found myself crying while staring at my phone in my shaky hands. "Find Ilwoo! I don't care where and how. Flip the whole country if you want. I want my husband back." I said to the security.

 

I was left alone crying in the living room. I can't call umma and appa because for sure they'll worry. I try to contact his manager but he said Ilwoo didn't go to work today. I called Minho but his bestfriend is not with him also. I don't know what to do. I grab my coat and went to the gazebo. I know he will come. It's our anniversary today. Our wedding anniversary. I will wait for him. I waited for him till I fell asleep.

 

 

 

 

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