You woke up at 7, after getting absolutely no sleep. When you would start dreaming, Hoya’s face would poke itself into your mind or him being buried would be what came into your head, and turn the dream into a nightmare. During the 3 seconds of sleep you actually got, Hoya would materialize in your head; pale face, hollow cheeks, chapped lips. And eyes open. Leaving you with no sleep.

You sat up and looked around. Infinite were all sleeping with pale faces and disturbed looks. Once in a while, one of them would toss and turn and then mumble something in their sleep. You sighed and got out of bed, removing the image of a dead Hoya from your mind.

L lived in a small two-bedroom house, which used to be his aunt’s. His parents were long gone and he had lived with his aunt for his whole life. She had raised him since he had been a baby. Until last year, when she died of cancer. It had been hard on all of you; she had taken care of you guys. When you and Hoya had moved here and she found out about your situation, she was so kind and sympathetic. She treated you like her own kids and made sure everything was in check (health, school, diet, etc.) No one could ever forget Ms. Kim. You were all devastated when she died, especially L. She was his mother, caretaker, and guardian. But most of all, she was his best friend. No guy, would ever admit that his mother was his best friend and the coolest person on earth. But L? He would prance around with her like she was his age and they were best buds  (which she acted like sometimes) and they would do whatever, whenever. They’d been that close. When she died, she left L this house (that was fully paid off, so it was now his) and an inheritance under his name.

You went into the bathroom, and looked for your toothbrush.

Before, you and Infinite had TONS of sleepovers at each other’s houses. So instead of lugging your toothbrushes around everywhere, you all had a toothbrush at each member’s house. It was so much more easier. You guys never had planned sleepovers, if you were all at one person’s house, someone would randomly decide to stay there and then everyone ended up staying. They all fit into each other’s clothes, so that wasn’t a problem. And you would wear their old clothes from when they were young.

Your eyes scanned the toothbrushes and they landed on a specific one. It was purple. And it was Hoya’s.

You froze, as your eyes went up and down the brush. More flashes of images of Hoya’s dead body went through your mind. You became rigid and threw it in the trash without thinking. You knew why L kept it. He felt like Hoya’s should be there; he was part of them after all. It showed that he would never leave everyone’s hearts. He was part of Infinite, and whatever they would do.

But you knew better, Hoya was gone. So why waste valuable toothbrush space on someone who’s never going to use it You were doing L a favour by throwing it away.

Well, that’s what your mind kept telling you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Are you sure you don’t need a ride?” L asked. Infinite had woken up shortly after you. They weren’t their cheery selves and judging by their looks, they had gotten less sleep than you had.

You nodded. Se Hun had left you 50 calls and texts. Each. He told you that the chauffeur would pick you up in a little while, he had missed you soooo much.

You suddenly felt guilty again, his wrist was broken. Who changed his bandages yesterday? What if he needed help with something and no one was around? And you hadn’t even asked how he was or if he slept well. Now you felt more horrible than ever.

L nodded and didn’t say anything else. All of you were silent. Infinite sensed that something was wrong with you. You had a different and more distant aura around you. But they didn’t know what to do to bring you back.

No one spoke as you all waited for the chauffeur to arrive. When he did, you said your goodbyes. Well, they did. You didn’t return the bye’s and just patted them once on the back as a hug.

You got in the car and rested your head against the window, closing your eyes. Infinite was watching you from L’s porch as you drove away.

You didn’t look back or show any sign of emotion throughout the whole ride. You didn’t even say thank you as the chauffeur opened the door for you as you got out of the car when you came home. You were a completely different person. 

You entered the mansion, emotionless and cold.
“Noona! Hi noona!” Se Hun said cheerfully running from the stairs, about to pester you with questions and concerns. But his speed decreased when he noticed your down mood.

You didn’t reply and just went straight to your room, shutting the door.

Se Hun glanced up the stairs, worried. *What happened to noona?! The guy that called only told me that she would be staying with them the night and that she was ‘healthy’. Not that they turned her into a lifeless zombie!*

You were sitting in your room, mindlessly unpacking. You put your things where they belonged and filled up the shelves and drawers. You found the picture of your family (the one with your mom, dad, Hoya, and you.). You also found a picture of you and Hoya, standing side-by-side and smiling at the camera while holding peace signs. You couldn’t even look at them, so you decided to leave them in the box they had been in. Maybe you’d take them out another day. Maybe not.

One box now remained.

It was your art box.

You walked slowly to it and bent down on two legs. You opened the lid and looked at the contents. Sculptures, paintings, drawings, artwork from school, and.... your sketchbook. Your sketchbook...... the reason Hoya was dead. You grew angry and sad (but mostly angry) at the same time. The object you were looking at right now had killed Hoya. *This. This stupid passion is what killed Howon oppa. This is the reason he's dead. No..... it's not the art's fault. It's mine. I killed him. I killed Howon oppa. My fault.*
And you dumped the contents of the box on the floor and began destroying every single thing, one by one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Se Hun was pacing downstairs, unsure of what to do. *What’s wrong with noona? Why is she so…. Depressed? She didn’t even say hi back, she always does. Even if it’s half hearted and she doesn’t really mean it, she still says it! It’s those guys! They did something to her! I know it! No good, old teenagers these days!* he thought angrily. His dad wasn’t in the house, he had to leave…. again. But he’d be back on Wednesday, in time for the business party on Thursday. He had also told the rest of EXO that he had a stepsister. They had all been like O.O and then started yelling at him for not telling them sooner. Then, when he told them about her, it turned out that D.O, Chanyeol, Baekhyun, Tao and Chen had her in their classes. Even Suho, since he was the peer tutor. Now they were even more eager to be your friend. Xiumin, Kris, Lay, and Kai had to wait until Monday to introduce themselves at school. And they seemed excited too.

Se Hun didn’t know what to do. He could call the guy that had called him and ask for an explanation.

Before he could make a decision, he heard a big BANG from upstairs.

His eyes widened and he sprinted up the stairs. He ran to your room and almost broke the door down as he went in.

Mess was an understatement.

What looked like art ripped to billions of pieces was scattered all over your room. There was an arm to a sculpture in one place, while the leg was on the other side of the room. Ripped paintings, sketches, and drawings were everywhere. Everywhere. Se Hun could barely see the floor. More ripped papers were here and there. Feathers, buttons, stickers, glitter, and beads were covering the ground.

And you were at the side of the room, crouching in front of a box with your hands around your knees. Se Hun saw an open sketchbook, with its pages half ripped and torn, on the floor by the side table. The lamp that had been on the side table was on the floor as well.

“Noona!” Se Hun cried as he ran to you, bending down to your level. There were dry tears on your face and you seemed to be in your own world, you hadn’t noticed Se Hun and were just staring; not even blinking.

“Noona?” Se Hun asked quietly, biting his lip. You were still in your own world, by yourself. Clearly, your world wasn’t a place you should be right now.

Se Hun fished his phone out of his pocket and scrolled to the ‘Recent Calls’ section. He found the number he needed and called.

“Hello?”

“Yes, hello. This is Se Hun……. What have you done to my noona?!” he practically yelled into the phone. Se Hun wasn’t a rude kid (normally), but the circumstances right now were different. These strangers had done something to his noona and he was going to find out.

“W-What do you mean?” he asked, his voice showed panic.

“Noona came home and just shut herself in her room! She was so unlike herself, and didn’t even say hi to me. Then I heard a BOOM from her room and I come here, and everything is a mess! There’s like art stuff everywhere. Except it’s ripped and broken! And now she’s just crouching in the corner with her arms around herself. She didn’t even notice me come in or reply when I called her! She’s so out of it! Like a zombie! What did you and your friends do to my noona?! TELL MEEEEE!” he demanded.

The sound of a phone being snatched away could be heard.
“Yah, L. I can handle this perfectly fine-”
“Give me the phone Sunggyu hyung!” another voice spoke. “Listen, kid. We didn’t do anything to her.”

“Yes, you did!” Se Hun accused. “Noona’s different now! She was happier before!”

“…. What do you mean?” he asked after a pause.

“She’s not herself.” Se Hun snapped. “And I demand to know what you and your friends did to my noona! I need to know so I can devise a plan according to that and make her happy again!”

“We didn’t do anything….” He said again, except not in such a snappy voice. “She just went through some stuff…..”

“What stuff?” Se Hun asked, refusing to accept an unclear answer.

He sighed, “Stuff you wouldn’t want to see. She saw her brother’s body. Dead body. I’m sure no one would be able to forget the face of a dead body, especially if it’s your big brother, who was killed right in front of you. Not died, killed.” He emphasized, with sadness in his voice.

Se Hun mouth opened in shock and he glanced at you, who was still staring at nothing in particular. *Noona............*

“Get it now, kid?” he asked.

“Yeah.....” Se Hun answered.

“Good. Now it’s up to you to make her happy and cheery again. You don’t seem so bad from what I’ve heard, so take care of her okay?” he said.

Se Hun nodded. “Got it. Thank you, mister!”

“It’s nothing. Just take care of Haerin, okay? Call me and tell me how she’s doing cuz whenever I ask, she says she’s fine when she’s really not. You give me updates, alright?”

“Okay.”

“My name’s L by the way. Just call on this number. It’s my cell phone.” He told Se Hun.
“L?” Se Hun said. “That’s an...... interesting name. I’m Se Hun~! Don’t worry, uh, L. Noona will be better in no time!”

“Good.” He replied. “I gotta go now, kid. Later."

“Goodbye~!” Se Hun put his phone back in his pocket after hanging up.

He looked at you, who could pass as a ghost with flying colours.

“Noona?” Se Hun called gently, tugging your arm. He glanced at the big mess in your room and wondered how on earth you did that in such a short amount of time. Anything that could be called art, was in your room all broken and ripped. From the bits Se Hun could make out and piece together in his mind, he could tell you were a great artist. He wondered why you would rip and destroy all of your great work.

“Noona.” He called again, a bit louder this time.

 You blinked and seemed to slowly come back to the present. You turned your head and looked at Se Hun. Se Hun tried not to step back at the dead look in your eyes.

"N-Noona.” He stuttered. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s my fault, Se Hun.” You said as tears squeezed out of your eyes. “My fault oppa’s dead. My fault. He probably hates me.... he should. But I still miss him...... I have no right to.... but I do. It’s my fault, Se Hun. I should go to jail. Actually........ I should be the one dead instead.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hello~!

Really really really really sorry for not updating before..... I’ve been quite busy.

But here’s a chapter~!

About the last line: NO! She’s not going to kill herself or die. Don’t worry... no more characters are going to die.

Awww L~ Him and his aunt were so close D:

Ohooo, L and Se Hun had a conversation! Se Hun called him mister.... I call people I don’t know mister/ ma’am as well xD

I couldn’t come up with a name for this chapter.... so excuse the lame title.

Oh and the business party is coming~!

Maybe in one or two chapters?

Keke, I can’t wait to write the business party. Those will a fun couple of chapters ^_^ (yes, it will be divided into different chapters (: )

EXO at a business party..... obviously, it’s not going to be a normal, professional one.

Soooo, that means those chapters won’t be sad~! YAYYY! Happy, funny chapters to come~!

Omg... these pictures... =DDDDDDDDDDD I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM THEM FOREVERRR!!!

omg KRIIIISSS =DD

AND KAI'S BRIGHT SMILLEEE

AND SE HUN'S ACTUALLY SMILING A TRUE SMILE (I noticed he doesn't smile a whole lot...)

AND SUHOOOO LOOKIN' SO AMAZIINGGGG

AND TAO DOESN'T LOOK HALF BAD EITHER~!

Kris and Tao look tired.... I think EXO-M's working really hard nowdays.

Poor them. D:

Okay, I’ll go now.

Once again, sorry for not updating.

BYEBYEE (: