"Jagi, what do you want to drink?" You looked up at Suho and pushed out a smile. It was still weird to sit here with the two of you together even though Suho had been on time for a date now much more often. But still, it was hard for you to get used to it, you couldn't let your heart get used to it because you were sure that one day things would change again. Suho wouldn't stay like this forever, one day he would go back to who he used to be and you were scared for that day.

 
"Jagiya, are you okay?" You blinked a couple of times and noticed you had been dreaming again, this now happened more and more often and you told yourself to stop it already but it was harder than expected. "Uuhm, yeah sure, I'm good." You said and shook your head, trying to act normal again because you knew you were behaving strange right now. Suho nodded, but you saw on his face that you had hurt him with being like this. You sighed and crossed the distance between your hands over the table. 

He seemed surprised by your sudden action and stared down on your hands before looking back up at you and shooting you a smile. "I just want some water." You informed him and then wanted to pull your hand back again but Suho's hand went on top of yours and held it in place firmly. Your eyes widened as you looked into his, which looked...sad. You felt a lump forming in your throat because of his look and you just had no idea what to say anymore. 

"We don't have to be here if you don't want to, we can go home." He suggested and you shook your head in the hope to convince him. "What makes you think I want to go home?" You asked and felt how his thumb caressed your skin. "Because you're not really paying any attention and you're always lost in your own thoughts." He was right and you knew it, but it still hurt to hear him say it out loud. You had never meant to be this far from earth all the time, but you just couldn't handle it anymore. It was all just getting a little too much at this moment and you needed to get some fresh air. 

You shove your chair back without giving your boyfriend any further explanation and walked out of the restaurant. You had no idea what was wrong with you these days, but it was a big deal for your relationship. Maybe you just had to end it, maybe that would still be the best for the both of you. You were walking down the street and breathed in the cold air, trying to get your thoughts back in order. "_______-ah!" Suho's voice rang through the air and you just stopped, your legs refused to move now you knew he had followed you all the way here. 

Two hands landed on your shoulders and turned you around so you came face to face with a clearly upset Suho. You stared at him as he tried to catch his breath and gave you a confused look. "_______-ah, what's wrong with you?" He asked as he slid his hands to your arms and held them there, not wanting not to make any physical contact with you. You just shrugged and pushed his arms away, like you had always done since the big fight you two had had. You saw on his face that he was turning desperate. You were always turning him down, you had changed. You didn't cuddle anymore, you didn't want him to touch you anymore and this was all worrying him. 

"Baby, just tell me, what did I do?" He asked and searched for your hand. You hesitated for a second but then decided that you would only make things worse if you would pull back so you let him grab your hand and felt how he squeezed it lovingly. "I just...I don't know or I can do this." You said and your heart broke when you saw the tears appear in his eyes. "Why? I changed right? Is there still something I'm doing wrong?" You hated to hear how he blamed all of this on himself while this time, it was you, it was all you. 

"No, it's not that you're doing something wrong, it's just...I don't know or I can do this." You said again and you saw the confusion travel over his face, it made your insides clench. "I can't get used to this Suho-ah, I'm just too scared that at one day everything will change again and that I'll get hurt again. I want to believe so badly that we'll stay like this forever but I'm afraid to do so. It's not that I don't trust you, but it hurts Suho and I don't want to get hurt again." A tear slipped down his face as he shook his head. 

You felt so bad for making him cry and suffer so you lifted your free hand and laid it on his cheek. "I'm so sorry for making you go through this. I was just scared to show you my love again because it might just turn back into how it used to be." Your heart felt a little lighter now you had said all of this and you hoped that he could understand. He opened his eyes again and looked straight into yours before circling his arm around your waist and pulling you against his chest without giving you the chance to pull back. 

"I won't hurt you again ______-ah, I made that promis to you and I'm going to keep it. You shouldn't be scared anymore because things will stay this way, like they are right now. They'll never go back to the way they were. I love you and I'm never letting you go again so please just..." He stopped when he saw your smile and you nodded, knowing that you had been wrong. if you wanted things to stay like this you had to show Suho how much you loved him and keeping everything inside wasn't going to help with that. 

"You're right, I'm sorry. Let's start over shall we?" Suho nodded and his eyes widened when you suddenly kissed him. But it only made him realise how happy he was for changing for you and not letting you walk away on that evening. Everything was going to be fine from now on and you two were going to love each other until the end of time.

Requested by worldunderwraps